RE: Serious Political Difference (Full Version)

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candystripper -> RE: Serious Political Difference (5/27/2006 9:36:28 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Sunshine119

I have been in a D/s live in relationship with my Dominant for 1 1/2 years.  We are diametrically opposed politically and while we both enjoy a spirited discussion at times, at times he becomes overly "pushy" as to his political beliefs.  After a series of these incidents, we agreed to disagree and when one of us called for a "over", we would just stop our debates (or arguments).  He cannot seem to stop and starts to make his attacks personal.  Afterwards, he is always apologetic and  all is forgotten.  Last night, it happened again as we were going to bed.  I got up, out of bed, and told him when he wanted to end his discussion and bring me back to bed, let me know.  I ended up sleeping on the sofa.  I am now so mad and hurt that even though he has apologized, it doesn't mean much to me.  For me, a Master is not a Master if he can not control himself.

Is anyone else in this situation?  How do you make a situation like this work?



Sounds to me as if the political angle masks deeper relationship issues.  Personally, i do not care what my One's political/spiritual/etc. beliefs are so long as He has some, and look forward to intelligent debate. 
 
Is it possible this is some form of sadistic play for Him?
 
Personally, i would not surrender my right to think for myself, vote for the candidate of my choice, etc.  i would adhere to my One's dictates on my level of political activism, as it might harm me or divert time and attention from the relationship.
 
Best wishes.
 
candystripper



Dustyn -> RE: Serious Political Difference (5/27/2006 11:14:34 AM)

I'm purposely non political... it's always the lesser of two given evils to me... I generally try to avoid discussing it, as well, simply to avoid a potential fight...



LadiesBladewing -> RE: Serious Political Difference (5/27/2006 12:12:17 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Sunshine119

quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania

Perhaps you should not discuss politics?


We both enjoy it so......until it becomes nasty.  It rarely becomes nasty, but when it does.....!BOOM!  In our better moments we can both remind ourselves that James Carville and Mary Matlin have done it for many years.  That is....in our better moments only.



My advice may be useful or not, but the way we handle this in our household (with a very opinionated and quite diverse gathering who all love one another but who hold divergent opinions on a number of topics (inevitable when you're talking a household of a dozen or more people)) is to accept that we -enjoy- the spice of our vehement and passionate discussions, so we also graciously accept the fact that, at one time or another , someone may "bulldog" a topic... get his or her jaws locked around something and actually be -unable- to let go of it until the pressure lets off (sort of like a pressure cooker, where the lid won't come off until the pressure is released).

For us, this means that sometimes, we all just have to sit there and roll our eyes while one of our mates rants on about something. I have to admit that I have my pet areas, and can rant better than just about anyone, but all of us have to deal with this at some point or another, just because of the sheer mass of our family.

If you love your Master, and you want the occasional forays into political discourse, you may just have to accept that there will be times when he won't let go of something, and you'll have to just nod and sigh until he's gotten it out of his system. It doesn't make him a bad Master, any more than you discoursing passionately on your areas that disagree with his makes you a bad servant.

Da'Avatar ZWD


www.klashaan.org



BlkTallFullfig -> RE: Serious Political Difference (5/27/2006 3:03:15 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: littlesarbonn
I'm a political scientist with the graduate degree and all. Because of that, I avoid political conversations with partners like the plague. I'm a recipient of several national championships in debate, so "winning" a debate is quite easy for me. But there's no purpose behind it. If an issue is important, I will present what I believe to be the salient facts, and if that's not enough, I don't pursue it. If I'm involved in a political debate in the political arena, I'm very steadfast in my argumentation.

Unfortunately, in way too many "arguments" I've had with people about politics, the other side isn't actually arguing facts but putting forth an opinion and then a value judgment based on whether or not you agree with him. You never "win" in a debate like that; you just end up in a continuous loop where the other person is convinced that he has superior arguments because you can't refute them. Kind of like arguments involving Biblical pronouncements where the substantiation ends up being the Bible itself. You can't have a communication with someone who thinks on that level.
Why do you avoid political arguments here?
You could show off your skills, teach us some things we don't know, give people a peep into how you think/where you stand, and impress a few ladies in the process?  
As you haven't a partner, you wouldn't be hurting your partners' feelings in the process anyway?!    M



fullofgrace -> RE: Serious Political Difference (5/27/2006 3:26:37 PM)

politically, He and i are very much opposed. He's somewhat moderate but mostly conservative, and i'm very, very, very liberal, like socialist. we both dislike politics, however; i'm less interested in it than He is - He watches the news and writes political articles, etc. and i don't even watch the news unless i'm at His house, but we both really aren't all that interested in arguing over things we just don't agree on. most of our differences are economic - even though He is conservative, He is for legalized abortion (though doesn't personally believe in abortion) and thinks gay marriage should be legalized as it's a religious issue and not a church issue (and we're both buddhist - He gets sick of christian religious politics very easily). i feel the same on those issues...however, i'm more interested in social welfare, environment, etc. and He tends to be more conservative on those things. for the most part, we just go our separate ways where that is concerned...neither of us are particularly politically active, so if i want to do something on my end, usually it's helping out at the homeless shelter or something, which He's perfectly okay with. we very, very rarely even discuss the economic things we disagree on (i'm not even sure WHAT we disagree on, we discuss it so rarely) and i don't think we've ever truly argued about it.



Sunshine119 -> RE: Serious Political Difference (5/27/2006 3:40:50 PM)

An update:

After totally floundering through our workout last night at the gym, bumbling dinner becausing I was working on 2 hours of sleep and then falling asleep in his lap at 11 last night, when we woke, he asked me if I had "gotten it out of my system".  Of course, being the little bitch that I am, I couldn't leave it there.  Now with more energy, I explained to him how very, very hurt and angry I was.  He went on to tell me that he left me on the sofa because I had left our bed and he wouldn't respond to the ultimatim of calling me back when he was "done".  So, as he explained, he left me there to learn a lesson. 

More angry now, we began to wrestle around on the bed and I ended up biting him and leaving some serious nail marks on his back.  Afterwards, I felt much, much better.  Everything now was over and, IMHO, he was now forgiven (given I had drawn blood [sm=trident.gif]).  Even though I am 5'11", he is both physically taller and much stronger than me and he could have seriously hurt me at any time....but he didn't

Because this is Memorial Day weekend, we have people who will be here today and tomorrow.  But, when getting out of the shower, checking out the work I had inflicted upon his body, he growled that I would pay for this Sunday night after everyone leaves while kissing me passionately and calling me a dangerous switch.  It seems to me he knew he had crossed the line and let me work out the punishment (though he would never admit to it).  Of course, I will sustain anything that I deserve tomorrow night for my actions this morning.

But heck, it did really clear the air.  Maybe KofM has somethine there with his "kicking and fighting" scenes. 



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