Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

RE: Loyalty


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Submissive >> RE: Loyalty Page: <<   < prev  1 [2]
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
RE: Loyalty - 12/8/2011 4:41:29 PM   
LillyBoPeep


Posts: 6873
Joined: 12/29/2010
Status: offline 		No worries RL, it is hard to predict behavior, especially in high stress situations like that.

And I agree that "developed" is probably a better word than "earned." It's less about proving and more about helping something grow.

_____________________________

Midwestern Girl

"Obey your Master." Metallica


(in reply to RaspberryLemon)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Loyalty - 12/8/2011 5:14:46 PM   
littlewonder


Posts: 15659
Status: offline 		as for the view of medical stuff. I give Master medical advice on what I think he should do but then after that it's his decision on what to do. I don't ever tell him what to do. I look at him as an adult and he's able to make his own decisions on what to do. Yup there are times when he's stubborn lol but I can't force him to do anything.




_____________________________

Nothing has changed
Everything has changed

(in reply to LillyBoPeep)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: Loyalty - 12/8/2011 5:47:11 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		We didn't earn each others love, respect, loyalty, etc. We merited receiving it by virtue of who we are.

Have I ever disobeyed a direct order because I knew it was going to cause a problem if I obeyed? Sure. Just this week he was complaining of symptoms that I knew meant his blood sugar had dropped too far even though he kept saying that couldn't be it.. I went off and got him a power bar and opened it and then shoved it at him. But he can't think straight in a situation like that so I'm supposed to disobey in order to take care of him. And yeah, 20 minutes later when he wasn't shaky and jittery, he was grateful I didn't listen.

But I can't imagine a situation so dangerous that he shouldn't get out too. House on fire, all of us have to leave.

Some of those hypothetical situations they like to natter about in O/p just leave me cold. They aren't sensible or realistic.


_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


(in reply to RaspberryLemon)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Loyalty - 12/8/2011 6:05:24 PM   
Toppingfrmbottom


Posts: 6528
Joined: 6/7/2009
Status: offline 		And for some it is, there's no one way not way. It's all up to those doing it to define" what it is about "for them
quote:

ORIGINAL: tazzygirl

Some think its only about the sex.


_____________________________

One world under lube with vibrators and dildo's for all! quote from the sex toy 101 book

(in reply to tazzygirl)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Loyalty - 12/8/2011 8:39:59 PM   
FrostedFlake


Posts: 3084
Joined: 3/4/2009
From: Centralia, Washington
Status: offline 		My Sis asked Hubby, "Why are you lying on the floor?"

"Oh, just resting, It's cooler down here."

Sis said, "I'm calling 911."

Hubby said, 'No, don't, I'm fine."

In an hour he was fifty miles away and had a stent in his heart. This is total vanilla, but satisfyingly dramatic. Loyalty trumps obedience fair easily in moments of need.

Need loyalty be earned? Being a significant other has to be earned, and there are some things I wouldn't do for just anyone. There are other things I would. Which one is up? How much is my help needed, really? This is an instant judgment made based on what we can see of the situation at the moment of stress.

Example. Swimmer puts hand up. I can't swim. But I can send someone who can. So I did. Had there been no one, it would be me, and that might not have worked out so well. So what would I have done? I think I'd have gone for it and trust to luck, but that is thinking about it here, now, warm and dry. What would I have done with the fear in front of me? I didn't know Kareen at the time. But the rules say the guy goes to the rescue. Where would my loyalty and obedience take me? Hmm...

Maybe I haven't really addressed the question. Lily?

(in reply to Toppingfrmbottom)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Loyalty - 12/9/2011 3:02:36 AM   
Arienos


Posts: 161
Joined: 10/5/2011
Status: offline
quote:

I'm a super loyal person, so if that person has become Capital Such-n-Such to me, then he's got my loyalty, end of story.


LOYAL: My workout partner is a female, a lesbian, stunningly beautiful and feminine; we both ride Choppers and recently were in a biker bar. An argument started, I ask, no, I told her to get her ass out of there, she left but came back in carrying her side arm and handed me mine.(It was in my saddlebags) She said if you are going to morgue or jail, I will be lying on a slab or setting in the cell with you. Now in my opinion you cannot get much more loyal then that. By the way, she is also my secretary and has been for over 15 years...and, her life mate is a close friend of mine.


< Message edited by Arienos -- 12/9/2011 3:09:46 AM >

(in reply to LillyBoPeep)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Loyalty - 12/9/2011 5:42:07 AM   
LillyBoPeep


Posts: 6873
Joined: 12/29/2010
Status: offline 		Nah, you're making sese, FF, nno worries there. I agree with you. If your sister had just "obeyed" her husband, he might be much worse off, or dead. You know, in my own life, when the Fella had the accident that killed him, loyalty wanted me to jump in after him and try to save him, though I was definitely not a good swimmer or strong enough to fight the river.
Predicting what you'll do in situations like that is kind of impossible.

_____________________________

Midwestern Girl

"Obey your Master." Metallica


(in reply to Arienos)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Loyalty - 12/9/2011 6:45:25 AM   
LillyBoPeep


Posts: 6873
Joined: 12/29/2010
Status: offline 		Des (I missed your post earlier) - I agree that sometimes topics in that group are a little unrealistic. I still like to read it and see what I agree or disagree with, but I don't post much, all things considered.
Your example is a good one too - if he's out of his frame of mind, do you just let him hang there in interest of being a fully-obedient slavier-than-thou? :p of course not. Your example, and FF's, show that sometimes you have to act out of bounds. Real life has a way of causing that.

_____________________________

Midwestern Girl

"Obey your Master." Metallica


(in reply to LillyBoPeep)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Loyalty - 12/9/2011 9:42:04 AM   
lizi


Posts: 4673
Joined: 2/1/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Fornica

Agree with the others.
I wouldn't submit (or Domme) to someone I wasn't in a relationship with. I wouldn't be in a relationship with someone I wasn't loyal to. It's a circle. And part of being loyal, is standing by your Partner, and, like, Steven said, representing them well.
Sort of an offside, but, this is something I hold true in my life in a few different ways..I was married for more than 10 years, and I never spoke poorly of my husband (in front of him or behind) to others..it's just distasteful to me. We get a lot of notes on facebook from people noticing even how we interact with each other and our mutual kids on there (things like wow, I can't believe you two joke around, praise each other, etc). I think it's in part the way I was raised..we were told the way we behave is how we present ourselves, and our family. It's something I hold true, and make a pretty big priority in my life.
Sorry for the ramble.


Actually Fornica I think your example is a good addition to the topic. Just because the two of you aren't a couple anymore doesn't mean you don't respect him and his place in your life and the life of your children and then you show that respect in tangible ways. I have exactly the same kind of relationship with my own ex.

When I was looking for a current partner I had some men that were wary of my loyalty to the ex and questioned it, that was fine and it was their prerogative, but it meant they weren't right for me because I'm not giving up the ex.

(in reply to Fornica)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Loyalty - 12/9/2011 10:51:19 AM   
tazzygirl


Posts: 37833
Joined: 10/12/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Toppingfrmbottom

And for some it is, there's no one way not way. It's all up to those doing it to define" what it is about "for them
quote:

ORIGINAL: tazzygirl

Some think its only about the sex.



I didnt say it wasnt.

Some think its only about sex. And that is perfectly fine if you are with someone who has only that expectation.

For others, its not only about sex. The expectation changes.

< Message edited by tazzygirl -- 12/9/2011 10:52:45 AM >

_____________________________

Telling me to take Midol wont help your butthurt.
RIP, my demon-child 5-16-11
Duchess of Dissent 1
Dont judge me because I sin differently than you.
If you want it sugar coated, dont ask me what i think! It would violate TOS.

(in reply to Toppingfrmbottom)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Loyalty - 12/9/2011 11:16:06 AM   
HeatherMcLeather


Posts: 2559
Joined: 5/21/2011
From: The dog house
Status: offline
quote:

Do you believe your "captial letter person" has to earn your loyalty, or does s/he have it by virtue of being who s/he are in your relationship?
She wouldn't be my "capital letter person" if I wasn't going to be loyal to her.

quote:

Do you believe loyalty is even necessary? Why or why not?
Yes, of course its required, it comes with being in love.

quote:

Have you ever had an experience that put loyalty and obedience in conflict? Say a situation where you were told to do one thing, but your sense of loyalty caused you to disobey and remain?
I completely don't understand your example, and I can't think of a situation where loyalty and obedience could conflict. Part of being loyal to her is to obey. That's our arrangement, so by obeying I am being loyal.

(in reply to LillyBoPeep)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Loyalty - 12/9/2011 11:20:52 AM   
Fornica


Posts: 2986
Status: offline 		Exactly
quote:

ORIGINAL: HeatherMcLeather

I completely don't understand your example, and I can't think of a situation where loyalty and obedience could conflict. Part of being loyal to her is to obey. That's our arrangement, so by obeying I am being loyal



_____________________________

There is no spoon.


(in reply to HeatherMcLeather)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: Loyalty - 12/9/2011 11:22:26 AM   
HeatherMcLeather


Posts: 2559
Joined: 5/21/2011
From: The dog house
Status: offline
quote:

Well one of the chicks who posted there mentioned an incident where her O had told her to leave (I assume it was a dangerous situation) and she chose to disobey and stay because she didn't want him to face "whatever it was" alone.
Oh! OK, yes I understand now. That is a tough one. I really don't know what I'd do, I'd want to do both, for different reasons. I guess it depends on the situation and if my presence would be a hindrance or not.



(in reply to LillyBoPeep)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: Loyalty - 12/9/2011 11:23:13 AM   
LillyBoPeep


Posts: 6873
Joined: 12/29/2010
Status: offline 		Have you read any of the examples that have been provided?

_____________________________

Midwestern Girl

"Obey your Master." Metallica


(in reply to Fornica)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: Loyalty - 12/9/2011 9:47:42 PM   
LafayetteLady


Posts: 7683
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Northern New Jersey
Status: offline 		But do you believe your staying or going is a matter of "loyalty" or "obedience?"  I see it definately as an issue of whether or not to obey, but really nothing to do with loyalty.

Obedience is easy to define.  I say, you do.  I say, you don't do, you disobeyed.  Even when there are valid reasons like DesFIP's (although a simple blood sugar test definitively shows if low blood sugar is the case), there isn't a question whether or not she obeyed, she readily admits she didn't and with good reason.

I think the example is the same thing.  While it is a bit ambiguous, it is a decision (hopefully made using some common sense) of whether to obey or not. 

To be loyal to someone is to be "unswerving in allegience" to them.  Leaving doesn't negate that.  Neither does staying.

(in reply to RaspberryLemon)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: Loyalty - 12/9/2011 9:53:12 PM   
LafayetteLady


Posts: 7683
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Northern New Jersey
Status: offline 		But do you believe your staying or going is a matter of "loyalty" or "obedience?" I see it definately as an issue of whether or not to obey, but really nothing to do with loyalty.

Obedience is easy to define. I say, you do. I say, you don't do, you disobeyed. Even when there are valid reasons like DesFIP's (although a simple blood sugar test definitively shows if low blood sugar is the case), there isn't a question whether or not she obeyed, she readily admits she didn't and with good reason.

I think the example is the same thing. While it is a bit ambiguous, it is a decision (hopefully made using some common sense) of whether to obey or not.

To be loyal to someone is to be "unswerving in allegience" to them. Leaving doesn't negate that. Neither does staying.

(in reply to RaspberryLemon)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: Loyalty - 12/10/2011 5:01:19 AM   
fragilepieces


Posts: 416
Joined: 7/6/2008
Status: offline
quote:

Another woman (one date only) grabbed my crotch when we were in line. Nobody saw it, but she still got dumped heatedly as soon as we were not in public.
Steven you dumped her because she was so hot for you she could not wait to get out of the store?   


_____________________________

Me to Daddy: Now you'll think I'm a weirdo
Him: I love you BECAUSE you ARE a weirdo.

(in reply to DarkSteven)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: Loyalty - 12/10/2011 10:01:37 AM   
LafayetteLady


Posts: 7683
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Northern New Jersey
Status: offline 		Oops.  Just woke up and saw that my post posted twice.  Not sure why.  Perhaps a mod can remove one.

(in reply to LafayetteLady)
Profile   Post #: 38
Page:   <<   < prev  1 [2]
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Submissive >> RE: Loyalty Page: <<   < prev  1 [2]
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.094