lizi
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Joined: 2/1/2009
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Clickofheels
An entirely new thread could be started just on the way people gang up on others for what they type throughout this forum. Sometimes it gets so bad, I don't know if I should throw a piece of raw meat into the circle before adding my opinion. (LOL) Consequently, I agree with Toppingfrmbottom without singling anyone out.
When I read the profiles of those who regularly post here, I find you to be (for the most part) an intelligent, knowledgable, and humorous group! So essentially you're destroying your OWN "image" to a larger extent, than the person on whom you are attempting to tear a new a**hole!
I don't pretend to be lily-white myself on this issue, although more times than not I don't post what I'm thinking. However, unlike a certain group of posters, I usually know when to quit...usually in one or perhaps two postings.
So many people come to this site as newbies. And, although you may have been more well-read on the subject or did a bit of trial-and-error before you arrived, it doesn't cancel out the fact that you were new here once too. Perhaps if we (all) will consider that fact, we'll keep our profile images true.
Respectfully submitted,
Ms Clickofheels
I agree with some of your points here and not so much with others. Every forum has it's own personality, and like groups of friends- like attracts like. Therefore those people out there that have a penchant for honest speaking instead of coddling are drawn to this particular forum, and those who find it too aggressive for their liking leave. It's like personality...some of it is genetic, some is environmental. Our genetics lay the groundwork, but our environment can sway things one way or another. I think as a whole there is a base personality here comprising the CM forums, you pointed out several traits yourself. Then according to who is posting at any particular time the flavor can swing one way or another, but you have to be amenable to honesty to even want to be here at all. Yes, the direction can swing into bitchy territory, but isn't it like that in life as well? Is this place some magical place that is above the usual human foibles?
I for one have to watch myself that I don't drift over too far into snark territory, I do that at times and am never happy with myself when I do. It's a constant thing that I watch though, maybe some of the other posters have the same battle and don't care so much about being bitchy or not and that's their prerogative. Mostly, CM is a place of honesty and if that comes with a price of sliding over into the negative then I'll accept that, because overall the honesty appeals to me. To me, this is real life, it's not hand holding. If your mama and your first grade teacher thought you were a special snowflake and you have that opinion of yourself, then I don't see anything wrong with being confronted with reality. Better to have it happen sometime.
I don't think ganging up really happens, what I believe it is that many people with the same opinion are giving the same opinion - which is instructive in the end. If large numbers of people feel the same way then that is a point all by itself. I mean just because 5 people before you had the same opinion does that mean you shouldn't post yours? I don't think so. Sometimes seeing the same thing come up over and over will really make a point clear, and I dont think that should be censored.
I don't agree with what TFTB did here. She resurrected a dormant thread to point fingers, and she used inflammatory terms and descriptions while supposedly taking a higher moral ground; she came back several times to make her point again with pointedly aggressive behavior. She could have come back with something like what you typed above COH, and made her point without modeling the behavior she is supposedly up in arms about. It's like having the old school nuns preach that God is love all the while smacking your fingers with a ruler or a bazillion other examples of do as I say and not as I do. It always comes off as childish to point fingers at others and act like you are above something that you are pointedly doing with a vengeance.
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