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Pet Peeves of the online community - 10/23/2004 12:24:57 PM

strongnsubmissiv

Posts: 197
Joined: 9/8/2004
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For a lot of us, the internet has been the virtual key to the closet door. An all too familiar story I hear, is that if it weren't for the internet BDSM community, most kinklings would still be thinking that they are the only one for miles around who has this kinky affliction.

In an effort to learn more about myself, I use the internet as a great portal for BDSM resource material. It's a great place where you can read about or chat with like minded folk, in an effort to learn more about ourselves.

What I quickly realized over the last 8 or 9 years of online activity, is that even though most of us are like minded, we are not all exactly the same. (a topic all of its own) However in my internet travels I've tried tirelessly to keep an open mind. That being said, I have to admit, that there are some things about the online lifestyle that drive me absolutely batty. Pet Peeves of the online BDSM community that even though I've tried to tolerate with an open mind, I just shake my head every time I see them. I though maybe you'd get a chuckle or perhaps a nod in agreement by me posting a few of my "Online BDSM Pet Peeves" and perhaps add a few yourself.

- The use of the word "one" or "one's" when people try to describe a persons actions or feelings. "It all depends on how it affects one's feelings..." This conotation pops up all over the place and it drives me crazy.

- At some point, in every BDSM story, you'll read this sentence "I stepped back to admire my handiwork."

- Political correctness gone bezerk when P/people decide that it's appropriate to make sure T/they don't offend O/others by using ambiguous C/capital and S/small letters. Give it a rest, we get the point.

- The need for people to try and impress by using old victorian English while in chat. "How art thou this eve?" Please folks, Hamlet has left the building.

- Mistresses seeking financial slaves. Enough said.

- BDSM preachers who claim that their views are the way it should be, and you should share in that opinion.

- People that don't know where to use the words Dominant and Dominate appropriately. For the love of GOD people, you can't BE a Dominate.

- Any nickname with "4u" in it.

- The most overused term in BDSM personals: BBW. Not all BW's are B if you know what i mean.

I'm sure there are more. Hope i didn't offend but rather got a chuckle. Any more to add?

sns

< Message edited by strongnsubmissiv -- 10/23/2004 12:26:45 PM >

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RE: Pet Peeves of the online community - 10/26/2004 5:29:58 AM

Thanatosian

Posts: 765
Joined: 5/10/2004
From: New Castle, PA
Status: offline

quote:

- The use of the word "one" or "one's" when people try to describe a persons actions or feelings. "It all depends on how it affects one's feelings..." This conotation pops up all over the place and it drives me crazy.

I will admit to being an offender witht his one - but until the english language comes up with a gender neutral pronoun, I find the use of 'one' less annoying than typing he/she or s/he or (s)he or hyr or some of the others I have seen

Just my tuppence.

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RE: Pet Peeves of the online community - 10/26/2004 9:13:18 AM

strongnsubmissiv

Posts: 197
Joined: 9/8/2004
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LOL Thanatosian...

I know what you mean. I'm no grammar expert but...

How about... someone's.. or a person's... your.... they... anything but ONE! LOL

I suppose it all depends on how one chooses to explain it. :P

sns

< Message edited by strongnsubmissiv -- 10/26/2004 9:21:50 AM >

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RE: Pet Peeves of the online community - 10/26/2004 9:59:22 AM

sweetpleaser

Posts: 689
Joined: 8/5/2004
From: Florida
Status: offline

quote:

- Political correctness gone bezerk when P/people decide that it's appropriate to make sure T/they don't offend O/others by using ambiguous C/capital and S/small letters. Give it a rest, we get the point.

Actually this is not as bad as slaves who write in third person. I don't care if they talk that way 24/7 but it is difficult to read their posts. Too much translation.

(I know, I know, it is important to their hardcore beliefs but just airing my pet peeve)

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~ann~

It's not the men in my life that count, it's the life in my men.--Mae West

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RE: Pet Peeves of the online community - 11/4/2004 12:00:58 PM

Shdw3507

Posts: 13
Joined: 8/19/2004
Status: offline

Personally I hate it whene people try to correct grammar, not everyone is good with it. though i do admit i find it funny when they type stuff wrong when correcting stuff.
I am also annoyed with people refering to other as "peeps"(Dont see it as much on this site though) or using a 0 (zero) in stead of o, But that is my opinion. :P

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RE: Pet Peeves of the online community - 11/4/2004 2:05:43 PM

proudsub

Posts: 6142
Joined: 1/31/2004
From: Washington
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I hate it when someone new enters a chat room and the first thing they say is "asl ev1". When that happens in one of my regular rooms in pogo there's one guy there that always says "this is a non asl room, read our profiles!"

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proudsub

"Without goals you become what you were. With goals you become what you wish." .

"You are entitled to your own opinions but not your own facts"--Alan Greenspan

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Post #: 6

RE: Pet Peeves of the online community - 11/4/2004 3:52:35 PM

blushes4u

Posts: 278
Joined: 10/20/2004
Status: offline

OMG i'm one of strongnsubmissiv 's pet peeves!!!!! I so sorry but i do blush for everyone

quote:

- Any nickname with "4u" in it.

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Post #: 7

RE: Pet Peeves of the online community - 11/4/2004 3:59:34 PM

Suleiman

Posts: 1127
Joined: 9/9/2004
Status: offline

While some may find it annoying, the useage of 'one' so cited is, in fact, a correct (if slightly archaic) form. It predates PC-speak by about a hundred years. I have had people get annoyed with me for correctly using 'whom', so I am afraid ireally can't offer you any sympathy here.

When I first came to this site, I had not bothered with the online BDSM scene for a while. For a brief instant, I thought the malapropic use of 'dominate' was some new PC fad meant to do away with the whole dom/me mess. Then, as I continued reading, I realised that the only people who did that, didn't know any better. I suppose it's just as well, I can't bring myself to add an unnessesary 'k' to the end of magic, either, and that's damned near mainstream now.

As to the whole third person thing, for a while I was surprised at how offenseive I found it, until I realised that in all my years, the only people I had ever encountered who were absolutely insistant on referring to themselves in the third person were all really pretentious artists. Thanks to them (and I've had my fill of them over the years, living in california), there is absolutely nothing humble in the act of using a third person self referential.

There are times when I feel obliged to ask someone to use clearer language, but only when they are talking to me and actually expect me to reply to them. I certianly don't object to misspelled words (typographical terrors fairly haunt my keyboard, and I frequently miss their handiwork), but I will occasionally twit my friends over some word they insistantly misspell (then again, they do the same to me - we are friends, after all).

Some of these peeves, of course, can not be commented upon by me, simply because I refuse to be bothered with chat, where apparantly many of the worst offenses occur.

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Think of my verbosity as a sort of litmus test for our relationship. I write in a manner identical to how I speak and how I think. If you can not cope with what I have written here, it is probably for the best if we go our separate ways.

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Post #: 8

RE: Pet Peeves of the online community - 12/13/2004 11:33:19 AM

dally

Posts: 108
Joined: 10/27/2004
Status: offline

lol, love this thread....got a good belly laugh reading the initial post. I have several pet peeves, i hate to admit it but spelling is one of them, not that I am not guilty of it myself, but when it's someone who constantly mispells, it can irritate the hell out of me.
the " how R U?" I can't stand, or "CU Later" of course a/s/l is annoying ... I also hate the assumption that just because I am a sub they can instant message me with a "On your knees bitch!" or "Do you want to be my slave?" The whiny sub, the overly arrogant "Lord Master" the bitchy slave who will stomp down your throat if you don't say A/all or use any other form of nonsense chat room protocol. Then there's the "mystical" dom, the one who tries to hypnotize you in chat, who thinks he can read your mind without even knowing your real name lol.....ah well, never a dull moment online with all these colorful "peeps" lol...

I will say this however, I have met tons of real losers online, but I have also met many who are amazingly bright and have truly left a lasting impression and some who have even helped form part of who I am today.

Attachment (1)

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Post #: 9

RE: Pet Peeves of the online community - 12/13/2004 12:12:56 PM

Mercnbeth

Posts: 11766
Status: offline

sns,
here's a few that are equally as frustrating and annoying:

people who insist that their "version" of proper english grammar is the "one true version" and that if it is not used by others in chat rooms or message boards then there is some sort of sin committed against the English Language Gods.

people who assume that one's ability to manipulate the english language "correctly" is an indication of one's sincerity, experience or value to the online community.

people who cannot bring themselves to respect or even read another's posted opinion unless it is written in the first person singular and only using what they deem to be "proper" english grammar and spelling.

big egos attached to small minds.

(in reply to strongnsubmissiv)

Post #: 10

RE: Pet Peeves of the online community - 12/13/2004 2:05:20 PM

rubytuesday

Posts: 180
Joined: 10/22/2004
Status: offline

I guess Im too new to be overly peeved by much - I still find the way different people use the language interesting.

But I am guilty of the BBW thing - now why do I use it - becuase its understood by the majority of people and I am tired of people finding out Im not a small person and then deciding they really wanted petite or slim - by using the term BBW there are no surprises :-)
And as for the beautiful part of BBW - to me (and after all Im the one that counts) I am just that - and Im proud of it.

sorry sns for getting on my soapbox - too mouthy for my own good sometimes *smiles*

ruby

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Post #: 11

RE: Pet Peeves of the online community - 12/13/2004 3:10:32 PM

dally

Posts: 108
Joined: 10/27/2004
Status: offline

personally, it's not that I dislike the "c u l8r" type thingy cause it's not "proper english" I just think some get carried away with it, and also it just gives me the impression the person is too lazy to just spell out the word, plus, it can just get annoying. That get's on my nerves a lot more than the whole Y/you and M/me thing....even if that also can be irritating and just plain silly.

(in reply to rubytuesday)

Post #: 12

RE: Pet Peeves of the online community - 12/13/2004 3:29:40 PM

perverseangelic

Posts: 2625
Joined: 2/2/2004
From: Davis, Ca
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: strongnsubmissiv
The use of the word "one" or "one's" when people try to describe a persons actions or feelings. "It all depends on how it affects one's feelings..." This conotation pops up all over the place and it drives me crazy.

I honestly admit I don't get this one.

It's considered proper form for the essays I write for my classes, so it by nature carries over. As long as the numbers are in agreement, I don't see why this is a bad thing. It's correct usage. Personal pet peeve maybe?

My pet peeve along this line? Plurals for singulars.
Ex
Speaker 1: "I have a new friend"
Speaker 2: "Who are they?"

not a good example, but I see it all the time. Individuals are talking about one person but use "they" instead of he/she. Drives me up the wall.

< Message edited by perverseangelic -- 12/13/2004 3:30:03 PM >

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RE: Pet Peeves of the online community - 12/13/2004 9:21:42 PM

SentForu

Posts: 303
Joined: 3/23/2004
From: Middle Tennessee
Status: offline

quote:

- Any nickname with "4u" in it.

Hey now... Well, at least, I don't have the number "4" in there

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Myra

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Post #: 14

RE: Pet Peeves of the online community - 12/16/2004 1:12:29 PM

alwayzron

Posts: 234
Joined: 9/23/2004
Status: offline

quote:

Any nickname with "4u" in it

Hey!!! That's part of my Yahoo address!

I thought it was original at the time ... by the time I found out it wasn't, it was too late.

quote:

slaves who write in third person

Ugghhh! THis annoys me! As sweetplea said .... it makes reading their posts very frustrating. I usually skip them ...

quote:

I have had people get annoyed with me for correctly using 'whom',

That's a personal quirk of mine as well. Most people use who when they should use whom. One lady in this group (please don't be offended at me for saying this) uses whom and never who.

quote:

say A/all or use any other form of nonsense chat room protocol,

THANK YOU !!!!!!!!!

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Post #: 15

RE: Pet Peeves of the online community - 12/16/2004 5:51:40 PM

SentForu

Posts: 303
Joined: 3/23/2004
From: Middle Tennessee
Status: offline

I will shamefully admit to this one. I can't stand it when someone uses "then" instead of "than". I don't say anything about it. I'm guilty of about every grammer error you could imagine. It's just that, I've seen SOOO many do that. It drives me up the wall.

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Myra

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Post #: 16

RE: Pet Peeves of the online community - 12/17/2004 6:13:11 AM

smile2cu

Posts: 265
Joined: 7/21/2004
From: Dayton, OH
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: blushes4u
OMG i'm one of strongnsubmissiv 's pet peeves!!!!! I so sorry but i do blush for everyone
quote:

- Any nickname with "4u" in it.

Well, I'm pretty close to his pet peeve as well. If its true, I wouldn't worry about it. Stop over and blush 4 me sometime.

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Post #: 17

RE: Pet Peeves of the online community - 1/15/2005 12:34:19 AM

txparanoid

Posts: 31
Joined: 12/31/2004
Status: offline

quote:

- The use of the word "one" or "one's" when people try to describe a persons actions or feelings. "It all depends on how it affects one's feelings..." This conotation pops up all over the place and it drives me crazy.

To be fair, that's the formal version of the word "you." Most copy editors would change "You should always" to "One should always"

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RE: Pet Peeves of the online community - 1/17/2005 4:33:31 PM

liltxsubby

Posts: 328
Joined: 11/18/2004
From: TX
Status: offline

I used to be guilty of the nonsense chat room protocol, only because i had been in a few chat rooms where everyone seemed ot get offended if it wasn't used. first time i saw that it's not requried here, i remember thinking "WOOHOO" and haven't done it since. Cant' say it really bugs me when others do it, i figure they're just trying to be unoffensive (if that's even a word). What irks me is people that over-abbreviate to the point you have to decipher what it all means. Oh, and the whole "you're a sub, i've never spoken to you before and have no idea who you are but do what i say and NOW" that some overbearing Doms seem to have."

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Post #: 19

RE: Pet Peeves of the online community - 1/18/2005 12:13:31 AM

FelinePersuasion

Posts: 4792
Joined: 11/20/2004
Status: offline

Hi my name is... but you may call me Sir or Ma'am or Master lol. That is really pretentious to expect someone not yours or under consideration address you as such titles.

I also hate the ones that hit on anything remotely female, or think that cause they're male an you're female, smacking her ass or coping a "tit" feel would be alright, I had someone turn cyber bday spankings into a sex scene an he left when I refused to let him feel me up.

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Post #: 20

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