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Suleiman -> RE: "Protected" by someone not in RL? (10/25/2004 2:02:55 AM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: BeachMystress
I once "crossed" one of the women with an online "protector." (I refuse to do the whole capital letter thing.)
My dear, I continually refuse to make use of the online tradition of capitalization (or lack thereof). I have found, as I have spent more and more time online, that my writing style has become more and more prosaically purple, until now I sometimes need to keep a thesaurus handy just to make my point. Purely a reactionary effort on my part, as the need for such simpleminded conventions disappeared with the advent of unlimited internet access a decade ago.
It is very attractive, to be, or to have, a knight in shining armor, and the old world values of chivalry (and the chatelaine attitudes toward women) make an easy translation for those interested in dominance and submission.
Frankly, I find the phrase "protector" or "protected by" to be of immense value in this regard, inasmuch as it tells me what this person is looking for. I can appreciate it, although I do not tend to indulge in it myself, and I do like having some basis for communication with these souls, rather than having (for instance) some person with a laudable amount of experience in the scene (but only online by means of chat and similar circumstances) telling me what is or is not correct behavior for a real-world dominant or submissive.
Personally, I see nothing wrong with roleplay, so long as it is kept in mind that it is, indeed roleplay. I think most of our social interaction with others, whether online or in real life, is a form of roleplay. The word "persona" means mask, after all. Most of the time, we wear social masks based on what we do and whom we interact with. We do this in our relationships as well, even the vanilla folk do, and we of the BDSM community most assuredly choose roles to play, as top or bottom, submissive or dominant. Some actors seek to enhance their range, and so call themselves switches, but it is still, on some level, a form of roleplay.
Thus, the trick is, in my opinion, to know what game is being played. Any little thing that helps me to understand the unspoken rules of the person with whom I am communicating is therefore a boon to me. I may not play by their rules, but it still helps me to understand them to know what rules they are using.
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