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submissive to slave transition - 5/30/2006 7:33:03 PM

genvieve

Posts: 228
Joined: 5/14/2005
From: SF Bay Area
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i knew a submissive who had been in the lifestyle for years, proudly submissive, never wanting to change... then met a Gorean Master and fell head over heels. This was all well and good until it was time to meet Him and she was frustrated when He demanded things of her or didn't feel the need to appologize for certain things.

So, i got to wondering... since she could not possibly have been the only submissive in the world who later decided to go the kajira route... did any of you ever have troubles with the transition? What were those troubles? How did you deal with them?

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RE: submissive to slave transition - 5/30/2006 9:43:41 PM

SweetEscravo

Posts: 193
Joined: 12/17/2005
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I actually first found out about bdsm through gor, so I guess I came from the other side. At first I was so sure I wanted to become a kajira, but as I found out more about both myself and that lifestyle I decided it really wasn't for me. It was never a big deal to me because many things about my submissive side have evolved over the years. You just need to decide what is right for you and then find the person that fits that. Maybe if I found the right gorean master I could be a kajira? You never know what is around the corner in life.

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RE: submissive to slave transition - 5/30/2006 9:51:54 PM

impishlilhellcat

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Joined: 3/26/2006
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I'm not going to get back into the age old debate of difference between submissive and slave.. I am one of those people that do believe there is a difference. With that being said I will say this... I am one of those people working on making the change from submissive to slave... I'm doing it for someone else not myself because it is he I wish to please. It's a daily struggle for me and sometimes I feel like I am doing it alone... Every once in awhile when I feel like I am making progress I find myself falling ten steps back in the wrong direction. It certainly doesn't happen overnight nor is it an easy transition.. I keep trying to think about the results it will bring and how happy it will make him when it's complete. I read often and try to learn as much as I can. I also wish often I had more help and guidance in making that transition, but keep moving in a general forward direction. Often even though I know of the results it could bring I do find myself frustrated and confused and I look at that as simply finding my way. I often wonder if some of the frustration and confusion could be allevated and if y'all have any advice on the transition I'd appreciate it. :)

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RE: submissive to slave transition - 5/31/2006 5:41:27 AM

cillydom

Posts: 332
Joined: 3/3/2006
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My explanation of a slave is a submissive that comes to a time in the relationship that the relationship is more important to her than anything he wants her to do.

When she needs the relationship so much that she is willing to do anything for him rather than loose the relationship, she is a slave.

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RE: submissive to slave transition - 5/31/2006 6:30:25 AM

LuckyAlbatross

Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: genvieve
So, i got to wondering... since she could not possibly have been the only submissive in the world who later decided to go the kajira route... did any of you ever have troubles with the transition? What were those troubles? How did you deal with them?

I think it's much the same as any growing pains a person has when they try and transition into a new aspect of themselves.

They give it time to see if their expectations are realistic, and whether this new choice is what will really fulfill them. Doing something just because you fall head over heels is usually a very bad indicator of whether it's actually a good choice in the long term or will work well for you. Time will show you more than anything.

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RE: submissive to slave transition - 5/31/2006 7:00:05 AM

littleone35

Posts: 2828
Joined: 2/17/2005
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I also came from Gor i found it a big change from kajira to submissive but i am happier as a submissive because my Gorean Master died. It was a big change but it was eaiser for me because he died just take it as it comes it was your choice so hope all goes well for you.

Matt's littleone

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RE: submissive to slave transition - 5/31/2006 3:02:12 PM

genvieve

Posts: 228
Joined: 5/14/2005
From: SF Bay Area
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Thank you all for your input. Please, let me clarify...i am not intending to begin the "difference between slaves and submissives" speech. Honestly, i believe there to be little difference. i simply was wondering about the transition and it's applications thereof.

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RE: submissive to slave transition - 6/3/2006 9:47:45 AM

daddysprop247

Posts: 1712
Joined: 6/24/2005
From: DC Metro area
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first, a submissive and a slave can be one and the same. imo, submissive (yes, even "a" submissive, the noun version) is a personality trait, how you are born. while slave is a status/station in life...something you become. i define slave pretty simply: one who is owned. i am a submissive who is owned, i am a slave. i did not stop being submissive simply because i became someone's property. i look at it this way...a woman who obtains a medical degree has earned the status of "doctor"...however, she is not only "doctor" from that point on and no longer woman. she was born female, that is what she will be til the day she dies.. it is the same with being submissive.

so, i cannot speak on making the transition from submissive, to slave, as i am both. however i can speak on making the transition from unowned submissive, to owned submissive (slave). despite knowing that slavery was the only true path for me...my only potential for fulfillment and joy, it was still a long, arduous, often excruciatingly painful (in every way one can experience pain) journey. and that journey was the journey to acceptance. for me, becoming a slave was not a process. one day i was unowned, the next day i was property. it was instant. sort of like when one buys an appliance and immediately pays for it in full...from the second you hand that money over and take your receipt, it's yours. however, unlike a television or washing machine, i happened to be human with all the emotions and trials that entails. so, it took me some time for me to accept that i was no longer a free person...that my Master had paid in full, and i was his until he sold me, destroyed me, or threw me out. it's all very heartfelt and romantic to realize that that is what one needs...it is quite different when faced with the cold reality of the situation.
but, if it's truly your rightful place, you eventually get through that transitional process, and come out on the other side with a sense of peace, which is a far greater thing than happiness imo.

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RE: submissive to slave transition - 6/3/2006 2:37:52 PM

MLskajira

Posts: 275
Joined: 2/17/2006
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this girl avoided Masters for years, she had no desire to be someone's slave ... until she met her Master.
the transition was not easy, only because she was not really sure what was expected of her but the desire to please Him was definitely there.
this girl will not be slave to anyone else, unless her Master tells her to behave in that manner for Another, but that is temporary and she and her Master both know who she really belongs to. by serving Another at her Master's command, she is serving her Master, and this kajira will always serve her Master to the best of her abilities in any capacity He wishes.

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