RE: BDSM vs D/s

RE: BDSM vs D/s (Full Version)

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LadyAngelika -> RE: BDSM vs D/s (10/27/2004 5:08:53 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: topcat It's either amusing or horrorifying to see the number of people that cannot define their needs or desires or even what exactly they think this stuff is about. In all fairness, occasionally I meet a seeker who promptly answers with a well though out, clearly spoken, self aware assesment of who they are and what they want and often, how they got that way- These are the ones I want in my scene. Know thyself. Thats the best place to start, and it's the best way to have a chance of finding a partner who can meet your needs, fufill your desires. Lawrence, As usual, you said it so eloquently. This is one of the reasons I have a hard time going to munches, clubs, etc. and much prefer interacting with people who are not in "the scene". - LA

NoCalOwner -> RE: BDSM vs D/s (10/27/2004 10:26:55 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: GoddessDustyGold Very good! May I quote you? Everyone's more than welcome to quote me at any time, all I ask is that you make no attribution when I've said something stoopid. [&:]

susannah -> RE: BDSM vs D/s (10/27/2004 4:05:18 PM)
I think it's all pretty relative, too, and have loved reading this thread. I think NoCaLOwner and topcat, Goddess Dusty, and Lady Angelika, really hit some wonderful points for me today, as did everyone else, (I just got up from a brief nap, so hope I'm not leaving anyone out - I find reading these boards incredibly valuable). It's nice to realize I can update my profile anytime, and add an avatar or a pic, because I am relatively new to all of this, too. Have to spend some time fiddling w/my computer and figuring out what I want to say and how to change my profile so it fits my situation, what I am seeking, and what I offer (it could take a few weeks or days, depending on my other responsibilities, and mood I guess). I am so glad these boards exist! - sussanah

SherriA -> RE: BDSM vs D/s (10/28/2004 8:01:59 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: OMC In my experience Ds was not incorporated into BDSM until about 8-10 years ago. It seems the advent of online exploration brought about Ds becoming a subset of the previously accepted Bondage/Discipline/Sadism/Masochism acronym. That differs from my experience. I originally heard BDSM as the trilogy concept (b/d; d/s; s/m), and that was significantly more than 8 or 10 years ago. I hadn't heard d/s broken out of it until it became popular online. For me BDSM included d/s.

IWantYou -> RE: BDSM vs D/s (10/30/2004 9:22:21 PM)
Interesting I well remember hearing about BDSM as a lifestyle <geeeeeee> 35+ years ago, it wasn't until a few years later that I heard the term D/s which was what two people who practiced it. LOL My slave likes to be bound and disciplined<well ok not disciplined every time [8\|]> but it were the acts sadism and masochism of which gave me an a look at which side of this life I might enjoy at that time and still do today. There were small newspapers and then some small magazines in the adult stores mostly, sometimes in a no-name variety store maybe. I have have learned over the years how to better live enjoying this practices and even better yet... with a submissive who chose to be a slave to me. She was the icing on the cake of trying to live this life. [sm=tongue.gif] I am glad I was curious enough when I was young to never stop learning about the practice of living but just conitinue to do the things time and time again that work. Rob

ThornBlood -> RE: BDSM vs D/s (10/30/2004 10:44:00 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LadyBeckett It would be kinda like breaking down blood...you've got white cells, red cells.... Thinks about this and shudders a lil... too close to needles.. Would rather keep mine all mixed up and inside.

Sinergy -> RE: BDSM vs D/s (10/31/2004 7:18:30 AM)
Hello, I have to agree with the posters who stated that many in the lifestyle have no idea what they really want, and further, lack the ability to articulate it. I found most I ran into immediately wanted to discuss beating techniques, sexual positions, and the like. Perhaps it was just me, but I have spent most of my adult life reading everything I can get my hands on, and thinking deeply about both myself and my relation to the world around me. Additionally, I have been engaged in numerous schools of philosophy and reasoning both Eastern and Western, and what has always driven my emotions has been my thoughts. What I found in my search was very few people were able to stand outside themselves (to paraphrase Dorothy Parker) and laugh at what they see. To further paraphrase Buckaroo Banzai, No matter where you go, there you are, and I found that most people I encountered did not know where they are. Im not sure what it all means, but it certainly qualifies as a.... Just me, could be wrong, but there you go. Sinergy

NoCalOwner -> RE: BDSM vs D/s (10/31/2004 12:20:26 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Sinergy What I found in my search was very few people were able to stand outside themselves (to paraphrase Dorothy Parker) and laugh at what they see. To further paraphrase Buckaroo Banzai, No matter where you go, there you are, and I found that most people I encountered did not know where they are. Im not sure what it all means, but it certainly qualifies as a.... It's funny, we decide that taking a vanilla, sheeplike posture towards sexuality is wrong for us, and yet as a subculture we follow a lot of the same tendencies that vanilla culture does -- like how we deal with conformity and non-conformity. If we don't recognize the name of a prestigious single-tail maker, the model number of a chastity device, or make of electrical toy, people wonder what cave we've been hiding in. We tell people to find their own kink, yet if someone expresses ideas about kink which are very different from ours, acceptance is hardly guaranteed. Some people will always do things because they're what some other people are doing, and others will do things because they aren't what some other people are doing. But what percentage of the time are we doing things only because it's our nature to do so? Take leather, for example. There are perfectly logical reasons for it being part of our subculture, it comes from gay, BDSM bikers with military backgrounds wearing bomber jackets to protect themselves from road burns. And yet, decades after WWII, kinky hetero folks who have never ridden a motorcycle consider leather to be a part of their lifestyle. Why? Per the definition of "fetish," leather qualifies as a fetish all by itself. But does it really have anything to do with pain, domination or bondage? Wouldn't a collar made of, oh, I dunno... denim work just as well? I'm not saying that it's wrong to remember and respect where your group came from, not at all, but like you said, it certainly qualifies as a....

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