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another question regarding subspace... - 1/30/2012 10:23:25 AM

MyHazelLabyrinth

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Hello again :)
I seem to be posting alot of questions lately, but that's how i learn. I'm a thinker and when i can't or don't know something i will ask. So perhaps this question will be foolish, but let's just go with it.

Regarding subspace....i did ask a question quite recently regarding what it was, i now have a better understanding of what that is. So thanks those that read and responded, and also a tiny bit of first hand experience. As i had my first "scene" very recently (trust me the background info needs to be here)

The person i was with, i trusted and he was very receptive to how i was, as it was my first "scene" and it was all good etc. I chatted with him earlier tonight, to ask why is it important to bring me out of subspace when the scene is over? what bad would happen if he just left me there?

He explained it to me, as he takes the aftercare very seriously. But i'm asking you this aswell. It is important to have aftercare, sure. But what consequence would occur if you weren't brought out of it?

I don't know if i'm wording it alright, but i really want to grasp WHY it is so important. I'm not doubting that it isn't important i just want to know WHY. (i apologize if this is quite a foolish question)

If you could help me with this by sharing your thoughts/views i would greatly appreciate it :)

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RE: another question regarding subspace... - 1/30/2012 10:37:12 AM

OsideGirl

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quote:

ORIGINAL: MyHazelLabyrinth
I chatted with him earlier tonight, to ask why is it important to bring me out of subspace when the scene is over? what bad would happen if he just left me there?

He explained it to me, as he takes the aftercare very seriously. But i'm asking you this aswell. It is important to have aftercare, sure. But what consequence would occur if you weren't brought out of it?

You'd come out of subspace on your own as the endorphins stop flowing.

Master doesn't bring me out of it. He wraps me up to stay warm, makes sure that food and water is nearby for when I do come out of it.....and then just lets me float until I come out of it on my own.

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RE: another question regarding subspace... - 1/30/2012 1:47:03 PM

DesFIP

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You will eventually come out of it. If we don't have time for me to float and then fall asleep and come out normally, I'm a wreck. I can't be allowed near sharp knives or car keys. And I've been known to walk into walls and be unable to navigate steps.

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RE: another question regarding subspace... - 1/30/2012 2:33:11 PM

Alida

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it may not be. Everyone is different. you may need no care or tons of care, you won't know until you try.

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RE: another question regarding subspace... - 1/30/2012 4:50:28 PM

littlewonder

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not everyone does aftercare and it has nothing to do with bringing you out of it. When the endorphins wear you come out of it.

We do aftercare because along with the rush there is a crash and aftercare helps to soothe that crash for us both...making sure we talk, snuggle, show our love for each other, making sure I'm warm since with the withdrawal I'm usually cold and that I am hydrated.

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RE: another question regarding subspace... - 1/30/2012 6:40:54 PM

Aileen1968

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I never experience subspace which kinda makes me happy. I don't zone out and I get to feel every single thing he does to me.
I don't require after care. I usually am up afterwards getting him things or doing what he wants me to do.
If it's at night, we usually just cuddle up together. He likes to wrap around me or use me as a pillow and we go to sleep.

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RE: another question regarding subspace... - 1/30/2012 6:41:16 PM

mummyman321

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I agree with what others have said so far for the most part. You will come out of it on your own. For the novice these tends to be quick as you are not playing hard yet.

For the people who play harder and get more into the extremes aftercare can be needed. Mainly the aftercare is to make sure you do not harm yourself until you are completely out of the subspace. Things like dehydration, electrolyte imbalance may occur. Your motor functions may take a few hours to come back. So operating machinery or driving a car would not be recommended. So the aftercare really consists of making sure your are hydrated and allowing you to rest until your cognitive reasoning is back and so are your motor skills.

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RE: another question regarding subspace... - 1/30/2012 7:23:54 PM

OsideGirl

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quote:

ORIGINAL: mummyman321

Things like dehydration, electrolyte imbalance may occur.

Exactly. I sometimes also have my blood sugar do a sudden drop, so I need something to get that back up too.

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RE: another question regarding subspace... - 1/31/2012 3:57:44 AM

ProlificNeeds

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The only reason I could see for bringing you out intentionally is if you two are at a dungeon and he needs to take you home, or if he intends to leave you by yourself and is unsure of your state of mind.
For me subspace can sometimes be a bit like a mild form of shock, I feel disinclined to respond to anything except flood and fire sort of deal. While I like coming out of it on my own, and enjoying the high as long as I can, if I'm going to need my wits about me, a good cold rinse or a few minutes until I walk it off is usually in order.

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RE: another question regarding subspace... - 1/31/2012 4:39:18 AM

Buzzzz

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What the others say. You will come out of it on your own, and it all depends on each individual. From my experience, 30 minutes does it in general, that would be getting out of it, not still "groggy" or "floaty" and doesn't include subdrop the next day or two either :)

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RE: another question regarding subspace... - 2/1/2012 6:44:36 AM

fucktoyprincess

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I do think this is personal to each individual as it pertains to the specific nature of their subspace experience, and their endorphin experience.

My experience - after a really intense S&M session it can take as long as 24-48 hours for all of the endorphins to leave my system. I don't need a ton of aftercare immediately after play, but I do need some type of "aftercare" at that 24-48 hour point, otherwise I get quite despondent. This is usually something that I discuss up front with people who I get involved with. And then the aftercare, at that point, is usually more of a touching base. A phone call, e-mail, text - some kind of interaction with my Dominant, even if we are both in the middle of busy days.

I would never play with a Dominant who wasn't respectful of my needs on this front, because it is critical for me to have someone touch base as the endorphins reach their last stage. Again, personal to me. I don't expect others to have the same experience. But knowing myself as I do, I've had to set certain boundaries and expectations in order for things to work well for me with this type of play.

So as you continue to play, I would try to focus on understanding how you experience subspace during the session, how you feel immediately after, and then how you feel a day or two later. And then determine for yourself what you need at each stage. Every Dominant I've ever been involved with has completely understood my needs on this front, and have had no difficulty helping me in ways that I find useful. There is what the Dominant knows and has experienced, but then there is your experience as well. And only you can answer the question of what your subspace feels like, and what your needs are.

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