RE: slave or sub

RE: slave or sub (Full Version)

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Focus50 -> RE: slave or sub (2/3/2012 3:40:27 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: curliesub I have been asked as to why I consider myself a slave and not a sub ( yeah I know my user name says otherwise) My reasoning is I don't have a natural submissive nature but I like to be MADE to serve my owner and wear my collar 24/7. How do you differentiate between the 2? I don't get hung up on any perceived differences. The main thing is how best our respective D & s energy complements each other. And besides, I consider all slaves to be submissive anyway; just that not all submissives are slaves. So the only unknown quantity comes back to what level we work best with and off each other.... Focus.

ChatteParfaitt -> RE: slave or sub (2/3/2012 4:19:37 AM)
This topic has been done alot, so I don't think Fornica's suggestion was snark; the CM archives are filled with great info. It took me years to accept my sub side, I finally allowed myself to be considered sub to that rare man who could engender that response in me. In time I accepted the term slave, then went back to considering that side of me "sub only." I too think sub is an umbrella term, found under bottom. All subs are bottoms, but not all bottoms are subs. All slaves are subs, but all subs are not slaves. Unfortunately, this tends to set up a hiearachy of bottom, sub, slave, and there has been a trend toward thinking being a slave is somehow better than being a "mere" sub. Or that being a sub is better than being a "mere" bottom. You are what you are, and I know from experience that tends to vary depending on the dominant you are with. Personally I don't get the I am a slave b/c I don't have a sub personality, as if there were some universal sub personality. When you are new, it's good to know how to categorize yourself. Once you settle in, you will (hopefully) become less hung up on labels.

Endivius -> RE: slave or sub (2/3/2012 10:19:36 AM)
I don't agree with the hierarchy bit, my perception is perhaps biased. I have noticed people often make attempts to define themselves as uniquely as possible; in order to sate thier egos regardless of what side of the coin they are on.

NiceButMeanGirl -> RE: slave or sub (2/3/2012 10:26:28 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: curliesub How do you differentiate between the 2? Another slave vs sub thread? Oh boy. We get one of these around here at least once or twice a month every month it seems. If you use the Search function, you will find that none of those threads really answered that question to everyone's universal satisfaction, so I don't hold a lot of hope for this one either. NBMG

Sizesub -> RE: slave or sub (2/6/2012 6:32:35 PM)
I agree a submissive nature but I am his slave. He owns me. My flesh is his.

LookieNoNookie -> RE: slave or sub (2/6/2012 6:45:29 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: NiceButMeanGirl quote: ORIGINAL: curliesub How do you differentiate between the 2? Another slave vs sub thread? Oh boy. We get one of these around here at least once or twice a month every month it seems. If you use the Search function, you will find that none of those threads really answered that question to everyone's universal satisfaction, so I don't hold a lot of hope for this one either. NBMG Oddly enough, I actually know everything. Go ahead....ask me anything....anything at all....go ahead....anything.....

JanahX -> RE: slave or sub (2/6/2012 6:48:12 PM)
oh god ... not this again

Morrgana -> RE: slave or sub (2/7/2012 10:43:51 AM)
To submit isn't equal of being subserviant. I prefer a man with a gentlemans approach in service combined with total submission when wanted/needed by me. The rest of the time I appreciate if he's able to take care of himself (and open my doors)

Petite4petite -> RE: slave or sub (2/8/2012 4:14:57 PM)
... How can you be "dominant bottom"? sorry i was trying to find the lady that said that on here but i seem to have lost it. This is my first time in the forums, sorry!

Petite4petite -> RE: slave or sub (2/8/2012 4:20:44 PM)
CASSSY: How can you be "dominant bottom?" Please explain this to me... thanks

searching4mysir -> RE: slave or sub (2/8/2012 4:26:22 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Petite4petite CASSSY: How can you be "dominant bottom?" Please explain this to me... thanks You can be a dominant bottom by being a masochistic dominant (instead of a sadist) and telling your sub exactly HOW to beat your ass.

Endivius -> RE: slave or sub (2/10/2012 5:58:35 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Petite4petite CASSSY: How can you be "dominant bottom?" Please explain this to me... thanks Just because you identify as a Dominant doesn't limit your ability to appreciate pain. Many masochists are dominants, and many submissives and dominants are comfortable topping them. Equally, a submissive can be sadistic.

womensitonmyface -> RE: slave or sub (2/21/2012 2:46:23 PM)
I consider myself submissive but they pretty much mean the same thing.

JeffBC -> RE: slave or sub (2/21/2012 3:07:09 PM)
For me, when someone says they are a sub, slave, dom, master, top, bottom, or any other BDSM label it means they have some definition in their heads about something related to BDSM and if I wait patiently I'll probably find out what it is. In my experience, none of the labels actually mean anything. Someone can be as "precise" as they want to be... I am a 24/7 TPE slave who is completely obedient and totally owned by her master. Seems pretty clear right? Except for you can't really define "24/7", "TPE", "total", "slave", "completely obedient", "owned" or "master". So the sentence actually comes down to: I have in some way or another... possibly completely in my own head... explored some aspect of the thing I think of as BDSM.

jennileigh8182 -> RE: slave or sub (2/21/2012 3:11:10 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Focus50 quote: ORIGINAL: curliesub I have been asked as to why I consider myself a slave and not a sub ( yeah I know my user name says otherwise) My reasoning is I don't have a natural submissive nature but I like to be MADE to serve my owner and wear my collar 24/7. How do you differentiate between the 2? I don't get hung up on any perceived differences. The main thing is how best our respective D & s energy complements each other. And besides, I consider all slaves to be submissive anyway; just that not all submissives are slaves. So the only unknown quantity comes back to what level we work best with and off each other.... Focus. I always find your posts so insightful and enjoyable. They just make sense. (Where else can that sentence be a lofty compliment? lol) It doesn't hurt, of course, that I generally completely agree with you, but you manage to say it better.

DennisNajee -> RE: slave or sub (2/22/2012 3:46:46 PM)
Few are worthy of the title slave. It is a mindset and one that few, in my experience, are able to attain. Too many want to degrade those who truly attain the title by self-naming. It is no different from those who claim to be masters. This is something that entails a great deal more than putting a capital in front of one's name.

OsideGirl -> RE: slave or sub (2/22/2012 3:51:40 PM)
[sm=beatdeadhorse.gif]

chatterbox24 -> RE: slave or sub (2/22/2012 4:02:32 PM)
In my journey and view i became a sub when my Master got thru to me and I actually starting listening, but still had alot of my own freewill and was not totally accepting still , I became a slave when I accepted and truly let him guide me, and wasnt just listening but performing consistantly without questioning. When I truly decided to give totally of my mind, body, soul and heart.

Casteele -> RE: slave or sub (2/22/2012 7:20:52 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: curliesub I have been asked as to why I consider myself a slave and not a sub ( yeah I know my user name says otherwise) My reasoning is I don't have a natural submissive nature but I like to be MADE to serve my owner and wear my collar 24/7. Which is precisely that. It's your reason. Isn't that all that really matters? If they ask because they are trying to determine if you and them have compatible views on the subject, take it as it is and answer plainly. If they ask for just about any other reason (such as the common "you call yourself a slave, so now you must obey me because I call myself a master!"), don't bother answering at all, just block them. quote: How do you differentiate between the 2? My way is different than your way, which are both different than his way, and those are all different from her way, and those are all different from their way, on so on. If you're asking if there is a communal agreement on how the terms are defined, the only agreement I have ever seen is "everyone has their own way." If you're just curious what others think.. For myself, I guess I'm old school; submission is 50-50, slavery is 100-0, and there are many infinite combinations in between the two.

hangemhigh1953 -> RE: slave or sub (2/22/2012 9:49:43 PM)
The way I see it... A submissive is a person who submits. A slave is a person who is property. You can be either one without the other, or both.

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