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angelikaJ -> RE: The thin line between trust and disobediance (2/9/2012 5:39:45 AM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: BoxwineForBrunch
you can't tell if a dude is a "remarkable man" in two weeks of long distance interaction. the fact that you say things like this is probably a red flag about your readiness to be emotionally entangled with anyone. this guy's behavior, as you describe it, is also full of danger signs. you may have just the right combination of personal dysfunctions to lead to an oldschool Internet Relationship Trainwreck. don't get me wrong, you two probably can't amp the passive aggression and the narcissism up all the way into one of those truly amazing Lifetime-is-calling-for-the-movie-rights deals, but it could definitely be respectably sized emotional disaster for both of you.
alternately, you two may manage to scratch out some kind of mutually fulfilling relationship. this is unlikely, but it becomes a total impossibility if you do things like convince yourself after a few days that you have found a Remarkable Man with whom you have a Deep and True Connection that Nobody Else Understands. if you keep thinking and acting like that, it is going to get messy and a few months from now you're going to be boring all your friends with stories about how much you hate the man who Wronged You on the Internet.
quote:
ORIGINAL: LilNewThing
Hi Fellow Subs/slaves,
I am quiet new to the BDSM scene and Dom/s relationships. I have met my first Dom and trust and like him so much it scares me a little. We live far apart but we speak on the phone, skype, chat, txt constantly and we have made, what i feel, is a rather unique connection. In fact it has been a soul touching experiance for me and he reiterates these same feelings.
He has never made me doubt his care for me. In fact I find him to be such a remarkable man i nearly dont believe he is who he says he is!!??
I've broached this with him and he says he is exactly who he says he is. He has asked me to trust him completely, which has always been difficult for me for personal reasons. He says everything he tells me is true and he has never given me a reason to doubt this, however i kind of want to tell him to 'prove it' but this would offend him deeply, maybe undermine him as a Dom and possibly risk the relationship, which i dont want. So, has anyone exoerianced this on online connections?? How do I trust him over my own personal (possibly irrational) insecurities...? Or, do i trust that instinct and ask him to share more with me?
thanks LNT
Listen, a guy might seem remarkable, or it might seem as though you have amazing chemistry.
You don't know if you trust him or not?
Of course you don't, it is only 2 weeks.
He doesn't know if he trusts you?
Of course he doesn't, it has only been 2 weeks.
You don't know if he is really who he says he is?
Of course you don't; you haven't met him yet.
The truth is you just don't know; you haven't met, haven't spent that much time together in the virtual sense and none at all up close and personal where it really counts.
Slow down!
You are brand new to this, enjoy the newness but don't lose your common sense.
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