No sex please, we´re British (Full Version)

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MissKittyDeVine -> No sex please, we´re British (2/8/2012 2:01:00 PM)

Check out the birdcage in the second pic. Awesome!

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2098362/New-Forest-swingers-club-fighting-closure-complaints-noisy-sex-parties.html



LadyHibiscus -> RE: No sex please, we´re British (2/8/2012 2:36:23 PM)

LOVE the birdcage! Too bad they don't have a bigger one for cage dancing...



ladynlord -> RE: No sex please, we´re British (2/8/2012 2:47:47 PM)

Wow. Nice set up. But I don't believe the statement "that it was not primarily a club but a home." With 95 parties a year?? If there really has not been any complaints this far along, then they can't be getting too rowdy!



PeonForHer -> RE: No sex please, we´re British (2/8/2012 3:04:40 PM)

To the horror of the residents, it was discovered recently that their neighbours are Daily Mail readers. I think something should be done.



mnottertail -> RE: No sex please, we´re British (2/8/2012 3:11:02 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

To the horror of the residents, it was discovered recently that their neighbours are Daily Mail readers. I think something should be done.


Cor Blimey, guv....the blighters are living next door to YANKS???



LadyHibiscus -> RE: No sex please, we´re British (2/8/2012 3:15:44 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

To the horror of the residents, it was discovered recently that their neighbours are Daily Mail readers. I think something should be done.


As soon as I saw this was a story from the Mail I started to giggle!



PeonForHer -> RE: No sex please, we´re British (2/8/2012 3:26:25 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus
As soon as I saw this was a story from the Mail I started to giggle!


I see no cause for mirth, Lady Hib.

There you are, enjoying a perfectly wholesome rogering of your husband with your strap-on up his khyber over Sunday lunch, only to look out of the window to see some rancid, overly-made-up old bat in a Laura Ashley dress through the window opposite, with a lemon-sucker's expression on her face as she reads the latest looney headline about Polish immigrants or one-parent families. Personally, I think that kind of filth destroys the traditional fabric of English country life.



LadyHibiscus -> RE: No sex please, we´re British (2/8/2012 3:28:09 PM)

Darling! Sex AFTER lunch, never during! All that bouncing is a sure path to indigestion.



LadyHibiscus -> RE: No sex please, we´re British (2/8/2012 3:31:24 PM)

And, there's the danger of biting your tongue while trying to chew.



kalikshama -> RE: No sex please, we´re British (2/8/2012 3:38:52 PM)

Next time I'm in the UK...



PeonForHer -> RE: No sex please, we´re British (2/8/2012 3:42:07 PM)

You know, I have a little hobby? If I'm standing behind someone in the queue at the newsagent's with a copy of the Mail, I'll tut. Tut, tut, tut. Because that's the average Mail reader's own favourite pastime. "Tut. Immigrants, again. Tut. Single mothers. Tut. Men who don't part their hair properly and refuse to wear Brylcreem. And never wear hats. Women with bare arms. Tut. Sex before death. Tut, tut, tut."

Revolting people. You know, there was an urban myth once that the Mail was going to bring out a new paper called the "Young Mail", for the under-70s? It's as stupidly right wing as the Sun, but has none of the Sun's tits and bums. I would honestly rather be seen reading a porny mag than a copy of the Mail.



poise -> RE: No sex please, we´re British (2/8/2012 5:24:21 PM)

I can see them nit picking on the dungeon equipment, and perhaps the beds pushed
together, because you know, vanilla people sleep in seperate rooms and all. [8|]
But to draw attention to the fact that they, God forbid, have a hot tub?
My favorite is how pitiful they make the living room appear to be when they
quote "Inside the living room there is very little furniture other than several leather sofas.
Ayyayayyy!



amaidiamond -> RE: No sex please, we´re British (2/8/2012 6:21:29 PM)

Well damn I wish my living room had "several" sofas...



LookieNoNookie -> RE: No sex please, we´re British (2/8/2012 6:25:03 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus

Darling! Sex AFTER lunch, never during! All that bouncing is a sure path to indigestion.


Lunch is rather sacrosanct.



LookieNoNookie -> RE: No sex please, we´re British (2/8/2012 6:26:34 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus

And, there's the danger of biting your tongue while trying to chew.


Chewing and biting....takes a bit of math.



LadyHibiscus -> RE: No sex please, we´re British (2/8/2012 6:26:41 PM)

It really is, JJ. May be sex BEFORE lunch, if it's not hot food...



txstranger -> RE: No sex please, we´re British (2/8/2012 6:27:48 PM)

My house is like that: several sofas. Well, two.



Hillwilliam -> RE: No sex please, we´re British (2/8/2012 6:36:34 PM)

"It looks like a very sordid and tacky looking house, perhaps if the owner kept his garden well, put curtains at the windows and cleaned up the grounds the neighbours might not mind so much."

I LOVE that comment at the end of the story.



LadyHibiscus -> RE: No sex please, we´re British (2/8/2012 6:39:04 PM)

There was a story? I just looked at the pictures! Whoops...



PeonForHer -> RE: No sex please, we´re British (2/8/2012 6:45:49 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Hillwilliam

"It looks like a very sordid and tacky looking house, perhaps if the owner kept his garden well, put curtains at the windows and cleaned up the grounds the neighbours might not mind so much."

I LOVE that comment at the end of the story.


That, HW, is the very essence of the UK's beloved Daily Mail.



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