RE: "Not real Doms"

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RE: "Not real Doms" - 2/20/2012 6:17:02 AM

Buzzzz

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quote:

It's like someone who works in the paint department of Home Depot trying to tell Michaelangelo how to paint the Sistine Chapel.

^^^^^^^^this^^^^^^^^

you may also want to introduce her to gay male doms such as Him

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RE: "Not real Doms" - 2/20/2012 1:11:26 PM

SailingBum

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quote:

ORIGINAL: MDomCouple

How would you handle a situation like this? Would you, if you were in my shoes, tell Amanda about your own experiences and D/s lifestyle? Amanda is, and has always been, one of my closest friends. Other than this issue, I don't think we've ever really found something on which we disagree. To her children, I am "uncle," to her husband I am practically a brother. But, I do worry that she will, despite her experiences as a Domme, look down upon me, my partner, and any potential sub we find to join us.

Also, as a sidenote, are her attitude and view regarding BDSM common?

I dont get it if the 2 of you are so close how does she not know your gay? My dad always told me " your lucky if you have one real friend in through your entire life". Now that I am much older I see his wisdom. The point being she doesn't sound like a friend.

BadOne

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RE: "Not real Doms" - 2/20/2012 2:01:24 PM

tameeks

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I agree that we all have friends that we can share things with and those who may not understand or have an open enough mind to understand everything that we're into. Saying that, I don't think it's cool for her to tell you that you can/can't be a Dom or not just because you're gay. If that is how you identify yourself, and your partner identifies as the sub to your Dom, then that's all that matters. Maybe you should not talk to her about your experiences, or let her know how you feel and give her the chance to either change or not.

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RE: "Not real Doms" - 2/20/2012 4:15:52 PM

Kana

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1-It's just my experience, but lots and lots of modern BDSM owes a whole fucking lot to the gay community, especially any leather folks, so I don't hear much knocking of gay male doms within the community, and I've lived and played from Honolulu to NYC so I've been all over America doing kink.
2-IJMHO and all, but whenever a person makes broad generalities about a ethnic group or social subcategory, say racist or misogynist or anti-gay comments, they ain't telling them a damn thing bout the group in question but are revealing worlds about their own personal ignorance.
Just saying...

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RE: "Not real Doms" - 2/20/2012 5:10:14 PM

ProlificNeeds

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OP: I always bracket hard truths to my friends with "I love you BUT....."

I totally agree with Jeff, and honestly if this woman can't respect you, why would you give any thought to her advice or her stories? Hell I wouldn't waste a cup of tea on someone who openly slandered against same sex pairings in any context, and I'm not even gay. I just find bigotry of any form disgusting enough to punish with social shunning.

< Message edited by ProlificNeeds -- 2/20/2012 5:11:14 PM >

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RE: "Not real Doms" - 2/22/2012 3:56:50 PM

DennisNajee

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Sexual orientation has nothing to do with whether one is dominant or submissive. In the BDSM world, there is every combination possible....gay doms, straight subs, tgs switches. You name it, we have it.

That being said, I will agree with the sentiment that Pro Dommes can be in it for the money only. If it is a profession, I do not consider that part of the lifestyle. Of course, many of these people do have dominant or submissive partners (you would be surprised how many Pro Dommes are actually submissive) which means they are part of the lifestyle.

This is your path to walk. If your partner and yourself want to add in a sub, that is a perfectly acceptable dynamic. To be honest, it matters none what she thinks (or the rest of us). This is your life and you are free to live it how you see fit. If Amanda has a problem with what you are, then that is something that I would say needs to be looked at.

Good luck with it.

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RE: "Not real Doms" - 2/22/2012 9:58:27 PM

imdmb

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it would be best to not actualy read this post, just skip right over it, thank you, this warning to skip over it has been a public service announcement

ok, i tried my best, anger and sadness over the stupidity.... i just fucking cant.... no... just cant...

damn, i really wanted to be able to say somthing here... wow... just wow... eventualy i would like to .... wow... ok, later on im going to try to edit this to say exactly why i cant say it now

reminds me of somthing sheldon said, taken slightly out of context i think it applies "other people are stupid and it makes me sad"

off to try to think of happy things

edit starts here
l
v
ok, doing a bit better now, thought things thru and trying to be calm, first of all, she should realise that being as she never really dominated anybody she couldent be called a true dom, not when you consider the people she "dominated" really controlled everything, including her personal income, who really relied on who? ok, leaving that part of the topic for a second before it becomes a rant again. now, she realises that as a woman who was trained by a woman she is not really anywhere close to straight, right? i mean, at all, just, at all. wow, had to do major edits there, i just deleted four paragraphs worth of ranting so now onto another topic. ok, maby a parrallel topic but dammit if i want to call it another topic i will and off to delete more paragraphs, wow im saving you alot of reading, when you nope, did it again, alright, for another topic. im betting the hatred of the dominant male community at all is coming from the bitc..person who trained her *shifty eyes thinking nobody would notice* ok, simple economics, if you make money from temporarily submissive straight males, then anybody who didnt have a time when they were submissive wouldent be a person paying you, also the fact of the matter, sombody not attracted to you at all when youre selling your body (even without the actualy body being part of the sale, its still what to look at) if you dont care for what youre looking at then youre not going to pay to look at it, this amanda just seems to have twisted that around in a very stupid way, she doesnt seem to understand that by the exact same logic (for reference, my soon to be uttered 'no's are not compleat absolutes, i know there are those exceptions, but thats what they are, the exceptions that make the rule) NO gay male is ever going to take up her services, and going even further along the same logic NO straight woman would ever go for her services, so, because of her fucked up view of the world, how i do believe she twisted an economic stance into being her viewpoints, she should hate every gay man and every straight woman AND at every single person who isnt into the slap and tickle world that she could provide because they would never ask for her services either!

good luck reading that, actualy if you value sanity i would suggest NOT reading that, i know its full of spelling errors but if i spend any more time on this right now i WILL NEVER stop the ranting and raving

wow, you know if i were to count all the words i had to delete it would overtake all of the words in this thread, and probably several others, im off to look at pictures of kitty cats doing silly things or im either going to have an ulcer or beat something to death and i would much rather make myself happy by looking at silly kitties then sitting in a police station explaining the web forum made me do it

true dom my fucking asshat god dam the stupid what the fuck does the fuck god damn fucking ass

ok, screw it, im going to leave that one in, i was going to leave it in as my grumbling which it is, but its also a pretty accurate representation of part of what i had to edit out, most of what i had to edit out had to do with the particular stupids that were making me type out such obsenities, and there are MANY stupids that i barely even touched on in the ok... time for kitties, that, if you wanted to know, was three paragraphs of rant so yes, time for kitties, and feel compleatly free to ignore my post, in fact, im going to put that at the top and bottom of my post, yes, and then some time tomorrow ill probably straight out delete the entire thing, but for now, oh look kitty time

it would be best to not actualy read this post, just skip right over it, thank you, this warning to skip over it has been a public service announcement

< Message edited by imdmb -- 2/22/2012 11:11:36 PM >

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this is all my own opinion! dont take it as anything but what i have experienced personaly! this is what has happened to me! results may vary!
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