How do you get inside a sub's head?

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How do you get inside a sub's head? - 2/20/2012 6:59:59 AM

rikkki

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Joined: 2/20/2012
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Pro-dommes will obviously encounter a lot os subs with an infinite variety of fantasies and desires.
How do you find the right 'triggers' that turn the session from the mundane to the deeply and richly satisfying?
Are there techniques, signs, hints - can you do it just by chatting?
Or perhaps, to turn it on its head - as a sub, what should I do to make sure I get the experience I crave - especially if it's something beyond what I've had before - something an experienced domme can add to the mix?

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RE: How do you get inside a sub's head? - 2/20/2012 7:18:46 AM

chiaThePet

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Joined: 2/4/2007
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For starters, the DEWALT Bare-Tool DC3855B 18-Volt Cordless Reciprocating Saw can be a mind blowing experience.

Afterward, attach the Great American Challenge Dildo to get inside other places as well.

Oh, and all that protesting and whining you'll hear, just turn up the saw to drown it out.

Enjoy the buzz.

chia* (the pet

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Love is a many splendid sting.

You can stick me in the corner, but I'll probably just end up coloring on the walls.

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RE: How do you get inside a sub's head? - 2/20/2012 10:49:35 AM

GloriousMorning

Posts: 171
Joined: 3/18/2009
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quote:

ORIGINAL: chiaThePet

For starters, the DEWALT Bare-Tool DC3855B 18-Volt Cordless Reciprocating Saw can be a mind blowing experience.

Afterward, attach the Great American Challenge Dildo to get inside other places as well.

Oh, and all that protesting and whining you'll hear, just turn up the saw to drown it out.

Enjoy the buzz.

chia* (the pet

bwahahahah.. oh the funny!

(in reply to chiaThePet)

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RE: How do you get inside a sub's head? - 2/20/2012 11:16:04 AM

GloriousMorning

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Joined: 3/18/2009
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My answer is, get to know them a bit. Talk to them first, ask them what they love, what they hate, see how they react when you interact with them or when under certain circumstances. Find out if they enjoy being controlled, forced, coerced? Do they enjoy fear, how do they generally respond to fear, pain, bondage or humiliation?

I am no longer a professional, but when I was, I catered to the needs of my client. My job was to find out what those needs and wants were, and act on them. I went by intuition, cause and effect, and a whoooole lot of acting to convince them that this was authentic domination.

I think for me, the key is communicating with and about my partner and what makes them tick. For instance, if I am with some one who gets off on feet (example), I might use this knowledge to coerce them into doing what I want in order to get what they want (even though if as a pro, what I wanted was usually still what they wanted). They feel as though they are accomplished at pleasing you (perhaps through pain, discomfort or humiliation), thus in a way earning their own pleasure, which is sometimes something deeply engrained in the heart of a submissive.

(in reply to GloriousMorning)

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RE: How do you get inside a sub's head? - 2/20/2012 12:07:16 PM

Rochsub2009

Posts: 2536
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The best way to get inside a sub's head is through lots of conversation. Communication is key in any relationship, but it's doubly so in a D/s relationship.

Remember, D/s is primarily a mental endeavor. All of the cages, ropes, cuffs, etc., are just props. Real submission is mental, just like real dominance is mental. If you dominate your sub's mind, the body will follow.

One of the biggest mistakes that I see "bad" Doms/Dommes make is only focusing on what they want, and not gaining an understanding of what their sub/slave wants and/or needs. The term "It's all about me" may sound Domly, but it really isn't. It's just stupid. You would never own a dog, plant, or hamster without first learning how to take car of it. So why would you do any less for a human being? Learn how to take care of your sub/slave, and they will happily serve you for as long as you'll have them.

ETA: I just noticed that the OP seemed to be asking about pro domme sessions. My answer was geared more towards lifestyle D/s relationships. Sorry about that. I didn't notice the pro-Domme focus of the question until after I posted my comment. But in hindsight, I think the same answer applies to pros just as much as it does lifestyle Dommes.

< Message edited by Rochsub2009 -- 2/20/2012 12:10:40 PM >

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RE: How do you get inside a sub's head? - 2/20/2012 5:15:16 PM

ProlificNeeds

Posts: 1061
Joined: 5/19/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: chiaThePet

For starters, the DEWALT Bare-Tool DC3855B 18-Volt Cordless Reciprocating Saw can be a mind blowing experience.

Afterward, attach the Great American Challenge Dildo to get inside other places as well.

Oh, and all that protesting and whining you'll hear, just turn up the saw to drown it out.

Enjoy the buzz.

chia* (the pet

This was close to my initial response.

Once you break through the skull, it's not so hard.

(in reply to chiaThePet)

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RE: How do you get inside a sub's head? - 2/20/2012 6:03:11 PM

LookieNoNookie

Posts: 12216
Joined: 8/9/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: chiaThePet

For starters, the DEWALT Bare-Tool DC3855B 18-Volt Cordless Reciprocating Saw can be a mind blowing experience.

Afterward, attach the Great American Challenge Dildo to get inside other places as well.

Oh, and all that protesting and whining you'll hear, just turn up the saw to drown it out.

Enjoy the buzz.

chia* (the pet

I'm with this.

(Unless there's a 4 volt lithium that comes out before I make my final purchase).

(in reply to chiaThePet)

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RE: How do you get inside a sub's head? - 2/20/2012 6:30:45 PM

LadyHibiscus

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From: Island Of Misfit Toys
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You can also get in via the sinus cavity, or behind the eyeball.

Or you can just talk to them. Men love to talk! Of course you have to *listen* in an active fashion.

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RE: How do you get inside a sub's head? - 2/20/2012 9:25:11 PM

MistressDarkArt

Posts: 5178
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Have them fill out a bdsm checklist. Bingo, triggers galore.

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RE: How do you get inside a sub's head? - 2/20/2012 10:19:15 PM

PrincessDonna11

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When we go to eat I hand him a pair of sexy panties to go to the bathroom to put on under his clothes. That is the very first chance you'll get to see weather the submission is going to be a challenge from the start. Then from there feel free to experiment . And when he/she hollars.... just smile

(in reply to MistressDarkArt)

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RE: How do you get inside a sub's head? - 2/20/2012 10:22:31 PM

crazyml

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Joined: 7/3/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: chiaThePet

For starters, the DEWALT Bare-Tool DC3855B 18-Volt Cordless Reciprocating Saw can be a mind blowing experience.

Afterward, attach the Great American Challenge Dildo to get inside other places as well.

Oh, and all that protesting and whining you'll hear, just turn up the saw to drown it out.

Enjoy the buzz.

chia* (the pet

If the whining is really loud, pop some Tchaikovsky on (try his sixth).

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Remember.... There's always somewhere on the planet where it's jackass o'clock.

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RE: How do you get inside a sub's head? - 2/21/2012 8:43:26 AM

Rochsub2009

Posts: 2536
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quote:

ORIGINAL: PrincessDonna11

When we go to eat I hand him a pair of sexy panties to go to the bathroom to put on under his clothes. That is the very first chance you'll get to see weather the submission is going to be a challenge from the start.

I don't mean to derail the thread, but this brought back memories. One of the first Dommes that I ever served used to make me do this. She'd make me go to the men's bathroom and slip on the panties that she had brought (they were always pink or purple). Then she'd make sure that I left my zipper open when I came out of the bathroom. That way, anyone looking would get a glimpse of my silky pink panties.

Ahhhhh, memories.