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Humiliation Play - 2/21/2012 11:10:19 AM   
sub1986katsu


Posts: 35
Joined: 6/24/2006
Status: offline 		Hello I’m interested in a Mistress’ point of view of humiliation. Is it just laughs or is there more to it?
I know there is chastity and there are denial of several types, but I’m just curious to know.. :P
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Humiliation Play - 2/21/2012 11:26:34 AM   
NiceButMeanGirl


Posts: 2756
Joined: 11/4/2011
From: Bellingham, WA U.S.A.
Status: offline 		I'm not into humiliation, so I couldn't really say. Plus, I don't consider chastity and denial humiliation. I think if you wanted to slap another label on those two things, I think they're more related to low-level sadism than humiliation because, being in chastity and having a hard-on try to happen, it would be painful. Of course, a sub may feel humiliated by it, but that's not my intention. Then there's my partner who said he could consider it a form of CBT. I guess there's any number of interpretations.

NBMG

< Message edited by NiceButMeanGirl -- 2/21/2012 11:27:35 AM >

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(in reply to sub1986katsu)
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RE: Humiliation Play - 2/21/2012 12:02:58 PM   
sub1986katsu


Posts: 35
Joined: 6/24/2006
Status: offline 		agreed nicebutmean, i think i have you as a friend on the other BDSM site. ;) haha ironic eh? lol i think i do anyways, but i guess you can consider Chastity or denial any of those things... I've seen it in stories as humiliation and i have seen it used as CBT as well as sadism.. hrmmm :P interesting way to look at it though... :P

(in reply to NiceButMeanGirl)
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RE: Humiliation Play - 2/21/2012 1:40:40 PM   
NiceButMeanGirl


Posts: 2756
Joined: 11/4/2011
From: Bellingham, WA U.S.A.
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sub1986katsu
i think i have you as a friend on the other BDSM site. ;)

Yes, we are. lol

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RE: Humiliation Play - 2/21/2012 1:50:13 PM   
sub1986katsu


Posts: 35
Joined: 6/24/2006
Status: offline 		yay :) *blushes for you nicebutmeangirl. :) im just really interested in Humiliation as of late. :P

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RE: Humiliation Play - 2/21/2012 4:01:07 PM   
MissToYouRedux


Posts: 867
Joined: 1/23/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sub1986katsu

Hello I’m interested in a Mistress’ point of view of humiliation. Is it just laughs or is there more to it?
...



There are many things I have my submissives do simply for my amusement that they process as humiliating (go figure lol), but that's never really the intent. The focus is always on *me*, my entertainment, as opposed to their humiliation.

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RE: Humiliation Play - 2/21/2012 4:09:14 PM   
sub1986katsu


Posts: 35
Joined: 6/24/2006
Status: offline 		I agree on that, and it is true it is for your enjoyment :D:D I like your idea Miss Marie, it is always a pleasure :D:D a pleasure for your enjoyment that is haha :)

(in reply to MissToYouRedux)
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RE: Humiliation Play - 4/12/2012 2:56:59 PM   
DominaCeleste


Posts: 33
Joined: 5/13/2007
Status: offline 		Very rarely will I do something simply for the humiliation factor... Like Miss Marie it's more for my enjoyment.

(in reply to sub1986katsu)
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RE: Humiliation Play - 4/12/2012 4:04:30 PM   
LittleMsMary


Posts: 63
Joined: 3/24/2012
Status: offline 		For me there's always more to something that just embarrassing or humiliating someone just for the sake of that alone. Not to say that the boy might not be embarrassed, but I don't like separating that act out from everything else. I do things that might be embarrassing but it's within a bigger "goal" or plan or part of play and I try to always keep that in mind since I don't get off on debasing people (others do, and that's their business, just not a trigger for me).

For example, I had one boy who I was friends with and who was totally, 100% inexperienced when it came to anything even slightly non vanilla. I swear he thought that if he was in a pair of fuzzy pink wrist cuffs, in a windowless basement in the middle of the badlands, that somehow EVERYBODY would instantly know he was a "pervert" and sick blah blah blah. He could get flop swear just from someone saying the word "paddle" around a ping pong table. I finally convinced him to let me run a little experiment. Long story short, I "made" him strip in the middle of the room and then I put him in a pair of panties. After a few minutes I let him put his jeans and tshirt on and we walked around the block. By now his face was bright red and he kept tugging on the hem of his tshirt to try and have it cover as much as possible even though absent X-ray vision you wouldn't ever have known what he was wearing underneath. I don't think he said more than three words in the first couple minutes but by the time we got back to the house he regained the power of speech and was more relaxed (though not entirely "relaxed" judging by how the panties were strained in front) and once he got through it he realized he had built up the fear and embarrassment was way more than the reality. Awesome guy and he finally kinda got it that embarrassment isn't always a "bad" thing...plus he looked adorable in panties I have to admit lol

(in reply to DominaCeleste)
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RE: Humiliation Play - 4/17/2012 8:30:24 PM   
AAkasha


Posts: 4429
Joined: 11/27/2004
Status: offline
I think my earliest memories of actually "getting off" on seeing a guy humiliated were when I was around 18, messing around with truth or dare or whatever at parties. Maybe even 16. The point of Truth or Dare after all is to get a person to do something embarrassing. Or to get your friend to make out with that guy she likes.

I realized that I got excited to see a guy "uncomfortable" or shy, ashamed, embarrassed. "Humiliated" is a pretty strong word because it kind of implies malice, which, while true sometimes, the malice is in a sense of spice or intensity but not true desire to harm. I like *shame* more than I like humiliation. The "crack cocaine" of sadism/femdom for me is male vulnerability, and there is nothing more vulnerable than a man who is very embarrassed, ashamed of himself but cannot escape. And feels objectified.

And, when you add on top of that the fact that he KNOWS the woman is getting off on it or entertained by it, then on top of it that HE is getting aroused by it and can't hide it, this just adds to the intensity and turns it into a snowball effect. Playing with these types of emotional buttons can be highly electric.

I like group humiliation situations - where women gang up on a guy, or a guy is embarrassed by women he doesn't know - because again, the vulnerability becomes authentic. Humiliation or shame are things that lessen in impact sometimes once a deep level of trust is built up. A man isn't that embarrassed in front of me if we have shared everything. If I blindfold him and bring him to a party and he knows no one, then finds himself in pink panties and bra and forced to dance on a stripper pole, then I get to see that vulnerability all over again.

Akasha

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(in reply to sub1986katsu)
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RE: Humiliation Play - 4/21/2012 9:23:59 AM   
Mistress4Sissy1


Posts: 3
Joined: 4/9/2012
Status: offline 		I think that for many femdom's it's different. I really liked what akasha said about male vulnerability. For me I don't humiliate or embarrass the man for the sake of doing it like domina Celeste said. However the fact is that the humiliation of a male, his embarrassment is what gives me enjoyment. For example when I send one of my sissy's out shopping ( always some of my favorite tasks) and have them get measured by an associate at Victoria's secret, well that's definitely massively embarrassing and humiliating for him, and that's what turns me on, that's what I just love. The fact that he/she would out themselves out there for me is just, well awesome. That's why I loves sissy's so much. Not to mention I get to groom them into the little girls they wish they were.

I guess with me, ( as I am both new and young) the idea of female domination started at a young age,perhaps unconsciously.Due to my beauty (not trying to sound bitchy) I always had boys in my school fawning for me. It was great, it still continues today. At a young age though it started as simply as "tommy, go get that for me" then as I got older and enjoyed males preforming tasks for me it moved to dong my homework if I didn't want to, picking me up lunch. Bringing my coffee order every morning. As vanilla as those may sound thats wha started me down the track to more and more deeper tasks moving to what i do to sluts now. And as far as how that developed in real life, well I have one slave who I've know virtually for ever and is my personal real life sissy. I love the little slut!

Sorry to get off topic from humiliation but I thought that might help explain the root of it and as to why it excites me.

(in reply to AAkasha)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Humiliation Play - 4/21/2012 10:29:21 PM   
LookieNoNookie


Posts: 12216
Joined: 8/9/2008
Status: offline 		Gawwwwd......you wimmens must think we're just weird fucked up sons of bitches.

You have such incredible power....why the hell are you all freaking in the streets as to "Men control us.....men have the power....women make less...."

WTF?

Seriously....ya'll own the fucking game.

(in reply to Mistress4Sissy1)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Humiliation Play - 4/21/2012 10:40:22 PM   
LadyHibiscus


Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline 		Yanno, JJ, one of these days you will say that and some woman will slap your face off.

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RE: Humiliation Play - 4/22/2012 5:55:25 AM   
ProlificNeeds


Posts: 1061
Joined: 5/19/2007
Status: offline 		FR~

Humiliation is a tool, a means to an end, sometimes sadism works better, sometimes other tactics, but the end game is to reach vulnerability, mentally and emotionally. To destroy the normal and automatic facades we put up every day to shelter the more fragile core of the ego.

Not to wound the inner self, but to see it, touch it. There's nothing more awesome than making someone cry, out of sheer over whelming experience, and at the same time have them look to you to make it better again, even though you were the one who brought them there.

It's not well described but, I don't know how else to put it. It's about wanting to witness and experience extream self realization and ultimately in the end, acceptance of self, and all the flaws we encompass, seeing them not as flaw but simply unique characteristics of self.

(in reply to LadyHibiscus)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Humiliation Play - 4/22/2012 2:40:07 PM   
Alecta


Posts: 1355
Joined: 1/19/2010
Status: offline 		I dislike the term "humiliation play", it's too subjective. Humiliation is in the eye of the beholder, after all.

There are some things that I expect that the sub/slave may find humiliating, but I do not consider it so for them. For example, acting as a footstool may be humiliating to some people, and in this instance I don't care because I'm not making you be my footstool to humiliate you, I just want a footstool.

Some people find certain levels of control humiliating, such as needing to seek permission to use the bathroom. To me, that is protocol and enforcing manners. Or maybe I took away your privilege to do certain things of your own judgement because I do not trust your judgement on it. While i understand this can be humiliating to some people, that isn't my objective when I set out those rules, therefore I am indifferent to it as a humiliation.

When I do deliberately humiliate a slave/sub, however, it's more than "oh that's funny", it's vindication, as well, and an emotional release; and while I try to only do this with due cause as punishment, sometimes I fail.

(in reply to ProlificNeeds)
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RE: Humiliation Play - 4/22/2012 3:59:26 PM   
LookieNoNookie


Posts: 12216
Joined: 8/9/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus

Yanno, JJ, one of these days you will say that and some woman will slap your face off.


I'm usually available after 4:00 in the afternoons.

(in reply to LadyHibiscus)
Profile   Post #: 16
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