Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

RE: my sub harrassed by another master's sub


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Master >> RE: my sub harrassed by another master's sub Page: <<   < prev  1 [2] 3 4   next >   >>
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
RE: my sub harrassed by another master's sub - 2/27/2012 1:26:36 PM   
MissImmortalPain


Posts: 2440
Joined: 4/1/2011
Status: offline 		I am tempted to ask what you would do if this weren't a sub. What if it were just a friend or a little sister. Wouldn't you tell her to deal with it in the same way anyone else would. Wouldn't you suggest to the young woman that it is most likely in her best interest to cut communication with said other person. That if she feels she is being harrassed to report it to the proper people. I would also hope that at your age you would remind her that if you break rules(as you implied she did) that sometimes you pay for such behaviours.

_____________________________

It is always by way of pain that we arrive at pleasure.

We must all go through a right of passage,and it must be physical, it must be painful,and it must leave a mark.

(in reply to SoftBonds)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: my sub harrassed by another master's sub - 2/27/2012 1:53:49 PM   
JstAnotherSub


Posts: 6174
Status: offline 		They are adult women and can not control them selves any better than this?

I say let them fight to the death.

Bless their lil hearts.

edit to remove cafeteria reference, after reading another thread

< Message edited by JstAnotherSub -- 2/27/2012 2:14:30 PM >

_____________________________

yep

(in reply to SoftBonds)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: my sub harrassed by another master's sub - 2/27/2012 2:08:35 PM   
BurntKitty


Posts: 3340
Joined: 9/7/2010
From: Here To Eternity.
Status: offline 		Is this a real life relationship or a cyber one?

_____________________________

Cat Quotes

Count Boogie's Foot Fetish Anti Creepy Training video


(in reply to SoftBonds)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: my sub harrassed by another master's sub - 2/27/2012 4:45:13 PM   
lizi


Posts: 4673
Joined: 2/1/2009
Status: offline 		I'm allergic to drama, this is way too much drama. You've only been on the site for 10 days and I'm positive you didn't have a sub when you joined as you were looking for information about what to do when you found someone, so this relationship is literally days old. Days old and already she's needing you to defend her against horrible people and threats to her peace of mind? It's not that I don't believe her story, it's just kind of crazy to be engaged in this type of thing with someone you just met. I have to say, what does it say about her common sense if she's going around getting involved with strangers that try 'topping' her (at school?) and then tell their Master that she is a unicorn for them. Is this a fantasy novel? Honestly, how could this level of stuff be happening already? What the hell kind of world does this woman live in?

For the record, no one at my school knows I'm submissive and doesn't try anything involving intimate acts with me or they'd find that I'd take appropriate steps taken to keep them from me speaking to them again, if that didn't work I'd go to the teacher, if that didn't work I'd talk to the college, and if that didn't work they'd find my shoes down their throat. I'm not going to have anyone in any walk of life speaking to me about something I consider private, and certainly not starting a drama filled mini-series and making threats on my person. This whole story is absolutely bonkers.

For someone who just started out, this wacky story seems a trifle overboard, is this what BDSM means to you? Is this woman you've known for days really that much of a catch if this is what she brings to your doorstep almost immediately within starting with you? I'd be wondering if it was all worth the trouble.

For the record you've always struck me as a well-intentioned person with a brain which is why this all just seems so weird.

As far as help, she can go to the college, they'll have their own campus security department and nothing BDSM need ever be mentioned. If the other woman brings it up, your partner can look appalled and be indignant at the suggestion. If either of you learns anything from this it might be that no one ever need know of your BDSM interests, and if they didn't, this whole thing wouldn't have started.

(in reply to SoftBonds)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: my sub harrassed by another master's sub - 2/27/2012 5:03:21 PM   
Killerangel


Posts: 1169
Joined: 8/3/2010
Status: offline 		Is this like a kinky soap opera? I never meet people and have them claim me as some kind of prize for their bedroom games and then get threats when I don't go along.

OP, read what you've written here on this thread and tell me it doesn't sound like the craziest thing you ever heard. Lol...people into kink are just people, they're not running around with nets trying to capture poor unawares college students as property. This all sounds fishy to be honest. It's a little too bonkers to be real. I've been kinky for a long time and I've never known anyone be interested in another if they didn't think they were on board with things. That's another thing, why did this other woman think she could somehow claim the woman you know as a third? What did this woman you know do that sent the wrong signals? If it's even all true...

I think this is either a complete fabrication or you're not being told the whole truth.

(in reply to SoftBonds)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: my sub harrassed by another master's sub - 2/27/2012 6:36:51 PM   
Fornica


Posts: 2986
Status: offline 		Is this online?
Is she is grade 10?

_____________________________

There is no spoon.


(in reply to Killerangel)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: my sub harrassed by another master's sub - 2/27/2012 7:07:10 PM   
NiceButMeanGirl


Posts: 2756
Joined: 11/4/2011
From: Bellingham, WA U.S.A.
Status: offline 		OP, as much as you want to save her from being picked on by this other woman, she's an adult. She can, or should be able to, fight her own battles. Can't she tell that other woman herself to stay the hell away from her and, if she doesn't, report her to the school authorities for harassment, sexual or otherwise, whatever kind it is? She doesn't have to bring up the BDSM aspect of it all.

Just because she's a sub, it does NOT mean she's unable to take care of herself. If you feel you absolutely need to get involved, tell the other woman's Dom that he needs to instruct his girl to stay away from yours or else <whatever you decide to do in case she doesn't step off>. If it were me and I were being harassed by someone who would not listen when I tried to be reasonable with her, there are such things as No Contact and Anti-Harassment Orders and I'd be headed in that direction.

NBMG

_____________________________

I'm now SweetlySadistic1 on CollarSpace. NBMG is an old profile, please see my new one.


(in reply to Fornica)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: my sub harrassed by another master's sub - 2/27/2012 7:12:28 PM   
Aileen1968


Posts: 6062
Joined: 12/12/2007
From: I miss Shore, New Jersey
Status: offline 		This sounds so ridiculously far fetched.
If there is even one speck of truth in all of this then teach her two words. Fuck off.

_____________________________



(in reply to SoftBonds)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: my sub harrassed by another master's sub - 2/27/2012 7:20:49 PM   
littlewonder


Posts: 15659
Status: offline 		Tell her it's time to grow up because that's what you do when you leave high school and move onto college....welcome to the real world!

If she can't even do this how is she ever going to survive in the world? Always hide behind you? What happens when you aren't around and she has to rely on herself?

Nevermind, I don't even wanna think about that. It's just too gruesome.


_____________________________

Nothing has changed
Everything has changed

(in reply to Aileen1968)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: my sub harrassed by another master's sub - 2/27/2012 9:45:09 PM   
Alecta


Posts: 1355
Joined: 1/19/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl


quote:

ORIGINAL: Alecta
If this was happening at kin club or similar, however, I'd just grab the other sub by the roots of her hair and haul her ass off in front of her Master


Which isn't kosher either and would be considered physical assault.



Granted, but I've got a temper and aren't always the most legit cookie ;)

(in reply to OsideGirl)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: my sub harrassed by another master's sub - 2/28/2012 6:01:28 AM   
risktaker9


Posts: 197
Joined: 3/10/2010
Status: offline 		OP, take the kink out of it- do what they do in elementary school when it's time for the word problems in math. Take out all the extraneous information. What you have then is a woman you just barely met having some high drama involving jealousy and threats with people she supposedly hardly knows. If she truly feels threatened she should go to the authorities which it seemed like she was doing by your last posting here. Problem solved.

Btw, this just doesn't seem normal in my opinion even if you throw the kink back into it. Craziest thing I ever heard. Remember, this is her account of what has happened, you are missing the other half. The actual truth is somewhere in between.

(in reply to SoftBonds)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: my sub harrassed by another master's sub - 2/28/2012 6:19:34 AM   
Englishcrumpet


Posts: 43
Joined: 2/28/2012
Status: offline 		it seems obvious to me that she has to be pretty new to all of this too - so shes in some sort of sub frenzy, all over the place, 'girls just wanna have fun' and 'protect me daddy' type of stuff.

personally id let her have her fizzy moment and learn from it - tell her you dont do 'drama' and see whether she picks her own tail off the floor and deals with this all by herself - what would she do if you werent there getting all protective about this.

(in reply to risktaker9)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: my sub harrassed by another master's sub - 2/28/2012 6:23:02 AM   
fucktoyprincess


Posts: 2337
Status: offline 		FR

You are allowing this other couple to hold the two of you hostage because of the BDSM aspect of your respective relationships - i.e. you are scared to go to the authorities because you don't want to be "outted". It is still harassment. Go to the school authorities. Just say there was a misunderstanding and that misunderstanding is causing behavior that is interfering with your gf's work.

If discussing this with the authorities requires you to go into detail about the relationship dynamics going on then do it in vanilla terms. If you do not want to discuss BDSM, then you can discuss the entire scenario in vanilla terms - threesomes and poly exist in the vanilla world. I highly doubt this other couple is interested in the details of their relationship dynamics being public either.

p.s. If this is a school, and this person is underage, please just remove this thread. If the reason you are not able to go to the authorities is because she is underage, then there is a whole other issue going on here, about which there is only one piece of advice to give.

_____________________________

~ ftp

(in reply to risktaker9)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: my sub harrassed by another master's sub - 2/28/2012 8:41:59 AM   
Missokyst


Posts: 6041
Joined: 9/9/2006
Status: offline 		wow. Sounds like this girl is much younger than the one you discussed a few days ago.. you know, the one who was not your sub yet. This kind of drama is very HS. Or.. it might be that she is a clever cookie who is stringing along an older man who is still too new to find out not everyone is as they seem. Have you actually met in person yet?
In the event you have and this threat to her is real, hasn't she figured out yet that the other girl also claims to be sub?
No threat exists if it can be flipped back on the accuser. And if as you suggest later in this thread, the threat is regarding her behavior at school then I say WTF... do you want someone who is unethical?
It amazes me what some men put up with to have a piece of tail

< Message edited by Missokyst -- 2/28/2012 8:42:12 AM >

_____________________________

pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding ~Gibran, Kahlil

“The truth is, everyone is going to hurt you. You just got to find the ones worth suffering for.”
― Bob Marley


(in reply to SoftBonds)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: my sub harrassed by another master's sub - 2/28/2012 9:14:00 AM   
SoftBonds


Posts: 862
Joined: 2/10/2012
Status: offline 		OK, so I've been talking to folks who post here offline, hoping the thread would just die.
Here is "the rest of the story," or at least, what I'm willing to share.
1. I have a "white knight complex." She didn't ask me to help, she wanted someone to vent to. I went into overprotective mode, which some folks mentioned. Hopefully I can learn from my mistake.
2. She is dealing with it herself. I was thinking of getting involved, but the combined wisdom of the boards has convinced me otherwise. I am confident that with the college officials she will handle it.
3. She is of age. I think I made her seem younger by my overprotective attitude, which again is my fault, not hers.
4. She did not do something wrong at school, someone else started rumors that she had done something wrong. She can prove that she didn't do it, but how do you stop a rumor, right? Folks still think Obama wasn't born in the US.
Conclusion: I goofed, I'm sorry, can we drop the thread?

_____________________________

Elite Thread Hijacker!
Ignored: ThompsonX, RealOne (so folks know why I don't reply)

The last poster is often not the "winner," of the thread, just the one who was most annoying.

(in reply to Missokyst)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: my sub harrassed by another master's sub - 2/28/2012 10:22:38 AM   
lizi


Posts: 4673
Joined: 2/1/2009
Status: offline 		Thank you for the explanation.

(in reply to SoftBonds)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: my sub harrassed by another master's sub - 2/28/2012 1:01:25 PM   
SailingBum


Posts: 3225
Joined: 12/10/2007
From: Sailin the stormy sea
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SoftBonds

OK, so I've been talking to folks who post here offline, hoping the thread would just die.
Here is "the rest of the story," or at least, what I'm willing to share.
1. I have a "white knight complex." She didn't ask me to help, she wanted someone to vent to. I went into overprotective mode, which some folks mentioned. Hopefully I can learn from my mistake.
2. She is dealing with it herself. I was thinking of getting involved, but the combined wisdom of the boards has convinced me otherwise. I am confident that with the college officials she will handle it.
3. She is of age. I think I made her seem younger by my overprotective attitude, which again is my fault, not hers.
4. She did not do something wrong at school, someone else started rumors that she had done something wrong. She can prove that she didn't do it, but how do you stop a rumor, right? Folks still think Obama wasn't born in the US.
Conclusion: I goofed, I'm sorry, can we drop the thread?


Actually no. What you have is a need to grow the fuck up complex

BadOne

_____________________________

The beatings will continue until morale improves.

According to SwithNSpanky
We are all so very lucky to have you with us to impart your great wisdom.

(in reply to SoftBonds)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: my sub harrassed by another master's sub - 2/28/2012 4:59:34 PM   
Focus50


Posts: 3962
Joined: 12/28/2004
From: Newcastle, Australia
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SoftBonds

my sub harrassed by another master's sub


Seems like a whole bunch of teenage melodrama so I'm just gonna give the simple answer to the subject title.

If my sub is getting harassed by *anyone*, then damn straight I'm gonna get involved. It'll be polite and maybe even passive - AT FIRST - as long as that's sufficient to resolve the problem.

One thing I won't tolerate of my girl is her being stressed and distracted by outside influences - because that affects her inside the relationship, making her problem mine!

Focus.

_____________________________

Never underestimate the persuasive power of stupid people in large groups. <unknown>

Your food is for eating, not torturing. <my mum> (Errm, when I was a kid)

(in reply to SoftBonds)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: my sub harrassed by another master's sub - 2/28/2012 6:17:32 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		The problem here is that you're trying to fix the problem without getting the other girl in trouble. What you don't get is that the other girl should be getting consequences for her action.

If this was a guy she had turned down doing this shit, is there any reason she wouldn't have already made a formal complaint?

If you were working in an organization and somebody was making it impossible for you to do your job because you had turned them down for sex, wouldn't your first response be to walk into HR and file a formal complaint?

Same here. This is what she needs to do. And not feel guilty about getting the other girl in trouble because the other girl caused this trouble and deserves to receive a consequence for it.


_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


(in reply to Focus50)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: my sub harrassed by another master's sub - 2/28/2012 6:29:00 PM   
SailingBum


Posts: 3225
Joined: 12/10/2007
From: Sailin the stormy sea
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Focus50


quote:

ORIGINAL: SoftBonds

my sub harrassed by another master's sub


Seems like a whole bunch of teenage melodrama so I'm just gonna give the simple answer to the subject title.

If my sub is getting harassed by *anyone*, then damn straight I'm gonna get involved. It'll be polite and maybe even passive - AT FIRST - as long as that's sufficient to resolve the problem.

One thing I won't tolerate of my girl is her being stressed and distracted by outside influences - because that affects her inside the relationship, making her problem mine!

Focus.


Yer kidding right? ppl are affected by outside stresses all the time job, family friends the list goes on. Call me crazy but the girl I choose to hang with would be able to handle the stress in their life without coming to me every day and saying fixit.

BadOne


_____________________________

The beatings will continue until morale improves.

According to SwithNSpanky
We are all so very lucky to have you with us to impart your great wisdom.

(in reply to Focus50)
Profile   Post #: 40
Page:   <<   < prev  1 [2] 3 4   next >   >>
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Master >> RE: my sub harrassed by another master's sub Page: <<   < prev  1 [2] 3 4   next >   >>
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.109