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tolovetolaugh -> RE: Dom/sub master/slave horror stories (3/5/2012 4:01:39 PM)
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Closest I have ever come to a horror story was vanilla, but screw it, It feels good to share.
I dated the guy for 9 months and often tried to introduce him to BDSM, via my patented and highly effective technique that uses sex as a reward, but it was a no go.
The best I got was the "shut up rule" Where anytime he wanted me to stop talking, he told me to shut up, and I would. It was fun at first(someone telling-and enforcing- me what to do!) but when he started using it when I had a concern or something I wanted to talk about, it grew stifling, instead of the initial feeling of freedom it gave me.
Ironically, he had no problem with violence when we would get in a fight. Which irritated the hell out of me, how can you be unable to smack me in play, but be perfectly capable of shoving me around during a serious fight?
When we started dating he had a job, which he got fired from a few weeks later. His reason for why he got fired was a story about how he let a friend of his come in and see/get a feel for some engineering equipment so he could write a paper, he left the friend unsupervised, and said friend stole from the petty cash drawer.
I mainly remember this because at the time, he asked me to loan him money so he could hurry back and replace it before it was noticed missing. I turned him down, as I barely knew him, but my roommate at the time(nice guy I met off here as a friend) lent it to him.
Through the course of our relationship he got and lost several jobs, each with a great "story" as to why. He constantly borrowed money off me, using all sorts of reasons up to and including he needed to buy food for his weekend with his son.
He was a very charming guy, who could talk anything into making himself look good.
Long story short, right before I got a major surgery, he had a new job and it looked like he would be taking care of me for once- atleast through my recovery. Since my roommate was moving away for a new job anyways, I moved in with my father. Right after the surgery though, my bf claimed he had broken a valuable piece of equipment at work, and needed to pay for it or be fired. I loaned him the last bit I could, telling him he had to have it back by the end of the week or I was screwed. He agreed. I made it clear I had already dipped to far into the money I had saved for til I got back on my feet loaning him money over the months. I would loan no more.
He came back within the week, hung out with me a bit in the house since I couldn't leave the house without my wheelchair.
The next morning I was going through my purse and noticed my cards missing.
My whole body went hot, than cold, and I knew. I checked online and my credit card had been maxed at a casino. my debit had been emptied at a gas station on the way to his brothers house(where he was living, as I didn't have my own place anymore) My dad freaked out and checked the whole house and found his wallet(though thankfully not his cards!) had been emptied, and a set of valuable silver that had been entrusted to my father by a great aunt before she died for my wedding day was gone.
I sent angry "how could you!?" texts, and got denials in response. I pointed out ATMs have cameras, and so when I call the cops, I surmised it wouldn't be his picture then.
I got back-
"You want to know the truth? Honestly? I did take it Caroline. But only the money and the cards, I don't know anything about silver."
"Anyways, I have a gambling problem and need help."
He then proceeded to send out a mass text, and I proceeded to not care past the betrayal and broken heart.
I learned a lot from it though- mainly how to spot and avoid a con man. I can see all the red flags from it now, and still feel like an idiot to this day.
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