Study: Women satisfied when their partner experiences displeasure!

Study: Women satisfied when their partner experiences displeasure! (Full Version)

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Anaxagoras -> Study: Women satisfied when their partner experiences displeasure! (3/10/2012 8:02:17 AM)
The quote below is from a new US study reported in the Daily Telegraph: quote: Women can feel happy when they see their husband or partner is upset, new research has suggested. [...] Dr Shiri Cohen, the study’s lead author, said: “It could be that for women, seeing that their male partner is upset reflects some degree of the man's investment and emotional engagement in the relationship, even during difficult times. “This is consistent with what is known about the dissatisfaction women often experience when their male partner becomes emotionally withdrawn and disengaged in response to conflict.” [...] The study concluded: “Overall, the findings from this study suggest that men may be more satisfied in their relationships when they can accurately read their partners’ positive emotions, while women’s relationship satisfaction may uniquely benefit when they can accurately read their partners’ negative emotions The study leads to some interesting albeit controversial question: (a) do a significant portion of women possess a certain emotional sadism (defined in this case as feeling some degree of satisfaction from seeing displeasure in their partner) if that isn't too strong and prejorative a word (sort of fitting since this is a kink site IMHO), and (b) if so, is this necessarily a negative thing since the lead author believes it manifests due to a concern about the relationship in question, with the pain of the partner in a way validating said relationship...

tj444 -> RE: Study: Women satisfied when their partner experiences displeasure! (3/10/2012 8:28:59 AM)
see,.. its like this.. its a man's own fault for picking women that cant give a great bj (or refuse to learn how to).. or a woman that stops giving 'em once the ring is on her finger.. [:D] eta- This shall now be known as TJ's BJ Index of Relationship Satisfaction (tm).. [:)]

Kaliko -> RE: Study: Women satisfied when their partner experiences displeasure! (3/10/2012 8:41:13 AM)
The comments on that article are great. "Why do women close their eyes during sex? Because they hate to see a man enjoying himself." Obviously, it has a lot more to do with the way that women relate to people in general, not just men, and that we feel a connection when someone shows emotion in a manner similar to how we would. Same as men will feel a connection more with someone who displays emotion in a manner similar to himself. This study happens to be among male/female couples, but I think feeling more satisfied in a relationship after a display of emotion can cross gender lines dependent on the people and the relationship. No big shakes.

Kaliko -> RE: Study: Women satisfie." when their partner experiences displeasure! (3/10/2012 8:47:15 AM)
Oh my God, the comments! LOL "Don't listen to other women. One thing I do know is that women may hate men but they hate other women more." "You can have fun with the ladies without permanently entering the bizarre little world they occupy." (LOVE that one. I apparently have a bizarre little world. LOL - it's actually kind of accurate.) "Vindictiveness and psychological abuse is a standard trait in most women"

tj444 -> RE: Study: Women satisfied when their partner experiences displeasure! (3/10/2012 9:07:54 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Kaliko The comments on that article are great. "Why do women close their eyes during sex? Because they hate to see a man enjoying himself." Obviously, it has a lot more to do with the way that women relate to people in general, not just men, and that we feel a connection when someone shows emotion in a manner similar to how we would. Same as men will feel a connection more with someone who displays emotion in a manner similar to himself. This study happens to be among male/female couples, but I think feeling more satisfied in a relationship after a display of emotion can cross gender lines dependent on the people and the relationship. No big shakes. really? women hate to see a man enjoying himself so thats the reason they close their eyes? lol maybe they close them so they can image the man is Brad Pitt or someone like that.. [:D] I close my eyes when i suck cuz i want to be one with the cock.. i do like to open them at times to see the look on the guy's face.. priceless! :)))))) (goes back to my previous post on TJ's BJ Index of Relationship Satisfaction (tm)).. hehe Seriously, if women dont want to see a man enjoying himself then why would they let him have sex with her in the first place??? [8\|]

kalikshama -> RE: Study: Women satisfied when their partner experiences displeasure! (3/10/2012 9:27:41 AM)
Sunny! QOTD nomination: quote: I close my eyes when i suck cuz i want to be one with the cock

kalikshama -> RE: Study: Women satisfied when their partner experiences displeasure! (3/10/2012 9:36:11 AM)
Might want to read the APA article before forming conclusions from the Telegraph article: http://www.apa.org/news/press/releases/2012/03/women-happier.aspx Women Happier in Relationships When Men Feel Their Pain Believing your partner is trying to be empathetic more important to relationship than actual empathy, according to new study WASHINGTON—Men like to know when their wife or girlfriend is happy while women really want the man in their life to know when they are upset, according to a new study published by the American Psychological Association. ...

DesFIP -> RE: Study: Women satisfied when their partner experiences displeasure! (3/10/2012 11:11:21 AM)
So why does the op believe that a woman needing her partner to be empathetic means the woman is actually a sadist? Because there's zero relationship in that.

Anaxagoras -> RE: Study: Women satisfied when their partner experiences displeasure! (3/10/2012 12:18:47 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Kaliko Obviously, it has a lot more to do with the way that women relate to people in general, not just men, and that we feel a connection when someone shows emotion in a manner similar to how we would. Same as men will feel a connection more with someone who displays emotion in a manner similar to himself. This study happens to be among male/female couples, but I think feeling more satisfied in a relationship after a display of emotion can cross gender lines dependent on the people and the relationship. No big shakes. The primary contention of the article based on the study is that with regard to the feelings in their partners that in turn yield a greater sense of satisfaction in themselves, women find satisfaction in perceiving the opposite feelings to men, and that women can feel more satisfied in relationships when they see their partner unhappy, whereas men do not.

Anaxagoras -> RE: Study: Women satisfied when their partner experiences displeasure! (3/10/2012 12:20:05 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: DesFIP So why does the op believe that a woman needing her partner to be empathetic means the woman is actually a sadist? Because there's zero relationship in that. Not sadistic with respect to the common imagery the word conjures up but rather experiencing some positive feeling when their partner feels bad. To quote the article: quote: Women can feel happy when they see their husband or partner is upset, new research has suggested. BTW I'm not advocating the research. I don't really know enough about it but I just thought it posited some interesting and quite controversial ideas so I posted about it. [:)]

tj444 -> RE: Study: Women satisfied when their partner experiences displeasure! (3/10/2012 12:29:29 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Anaxagoras quote: ORIGINAL: Kaliko Obviously, it has a lot more to do with the way that women relate to people in general, not just men, and that we feel a connection when someone shows emotion in a manner similar to how we would. Same as men will feel a connection more with someone who displays emotion in a manner similar to himself. This study happens to be among male/female couples, but I think feeling more satisfied in a relationship after a display of emotion can cross gender lines dependent on the people and the relationship. No big shakes. The primary contention of the article based on the study is that with regard to the feelings in their partners that in turn yield a greater sense of satisfaction in themselves, women find satisfaction in perceiving the opposite feelings to men, and that women can feel more satisfied in relationships when they see their partner unhappy, whereas men do not. and do you believe that primary contention???.. cuz, for me,.. there is no greater satisfaction than hearing.. "omg, dont stop baby".. and "omg that feels so good, you give the best bjs i have ever had in my whole life!" and "omg, Im gonna cum, Im gonna cum! ohhhhh.. ohhh.. OHHHHHH OMG!" and then him sitting there all cute n bleary-eyed and unable to walk cuz his legs turned to jello.. [:)] Now, i suppose the sadist part comes in if we split up and he never gets that again.. or no where near as good... (snicker) [:D]

Anaxagoras -> RE: Study: Women satisfied when their partner experiences displeasure! (3/10/2012 12:40:00 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: kalikshama Might want to read the APA article before forming conclusions from the Telegraph article: http://www.apa.org/news/press/releases/2012/03/women-happier.aspx Women Happier in Relationships When Men Feel Their Pain Believing your partner is trying to be empathetic more important to relationship than actual empathy, according to new study WASHINGTON—Men like to know when their wife or girlfriend is happy while women really want the man in their life to know when they are upset, according to a new study published by the American Psychological Association.... Women experiencing this feeling of satisfaction was explained by way of it illustrating that their male partners showed empathy toward them, which the author of the report suggested as stated in the original article. That was one element but the recounted incidents that were analysed related broadly to incidents "with his or her partner over the past couple of months that was particularly frustrating, disappointing or upsetting" which to my mind wouldn't necessarily relate a majority of the time to situations where men expressed some empathy toward the women they are involved with...

Anaxagoras -> RE: Study: Women satisfied when their partner experiences displeasure! (3/10/2012 12:45:54 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: tj444 and do you believe that primary contention???.. Don't really know to be honest, there may be some truth in it but maybe more studies like it need to be done first... quote: cuz, for me,.. there is no greater satisfaction than hearing.. "omg, dont stop baby".. and "omg that feels so good, you give the best bjs i have ever had in my whole life!" and "omg, Im gonna cum, Im gonna cum! ohhhhh.. ohhh.. OHHHHHH OMG!" and then him sitting there all cute n bleary-eyed and unable to walk cuz his legs turned to jello.. [:)] Now, i suppose the sadist part comes in if we split up and he never gets that again.. or no where near as good... (snicker) [:D] [Quickly books a plane ticket to California...]

Winterapple -> RE: Study: Women satisfied when their partner experiences displeasure! (3/10/2012 12:53:01 PM)
FR I think what this study about more than anything is about how men and women see and express emotions differently many times and many ways. It's like a pot on the stove. Men want the lid to stay on the pot because if the lid comes off the stuff in the pot will come boiling out and you end up with a empty pot. Women get anxious about the lid staying on the pot. If it stays on maybe the contents in the pot are boiling away and you end up with a empty pot. Maybe it's a good idea to lift the lid a little, take a peek and stir things a little or loosen the lid to let a little steam out. It's just the old I need you to tell me you love me thing versus the I told you I love you if I stop I'll let you know thing. As for the closing the eye thing. If the fuck is going well my eyes are rolled back in my head and I begin speaking in tongues. I like that being at one with the cock.[;)] Men can want eye contact at the most bizarre times. Fucking or sucking let's become one with the cock. Seriously, dude don't crush our groove, we're connecting both on and above the earthly plane.

gigglecream -> RE: Study: Women satisfied when their partner experiences displeasure! (3/10/2012 12:53:13 PM)
oh the daily telegraph published some bullshit that infantilizes women. yes let us all discuss this issue with the gravity and dignity it deserves. farrrrttttttttttt

tj444 -> RE: Study: Women satisfied when their partner experiences displeasure! (3/10/2012 2:50:40 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: gigglecream oh the daily telegraph published some bullshit that infantilizes women. yes let us all discuss this issue with the gravity and dignity it deserves. farrrrttttttttttt lol They arent the only one, some are much more simplistic but sinister tho.. take Cosmo and their quizzes.. how many relationships have been destroyed by taking them and getting the wrong answers? [:D] [8\|]

PeonForHer -> RE: Study: Women satisfied when their partner experiences displeasure! (3/10/2012 5:11:43 PM)
FR Anax, you don't think that this research is suggesting that women can be nasty in some way, do you? Because I won't hear of that! Oh no! I read a feminist author some while ago. From what I could make out, she was opining that women, if they're baddie at all, are only baddie because men - being the brutes that they are - made them that way. Women are nice, and I won't hear it said otherwise.

tj444 -> RE: Study: Women satisfied when their partner experiences displeasure! (3/10/2012 5:37:41 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Anaxagoras quote: ORIGINAL: tj444 and do you believe that primary contention???.. Don't really know to be honest, there may be some truth in it but maybe more studies like it need to be done first... I think that most studies are of vanilla women and generally speaking, vanilla women are very different than bdsm/sub/slave women (imo).. Vanilla women arent usually open to "being trained" by their man (or bending to his wishes), their man tends to be the one that is trained.. that kinda thing can cause a lot of friction, imo.. once the guy realizes it, that is.. there are also games played, like using-no-sex-as-a-punishment thing.. etc.. But,.. isnt that why there are 10 guys here to every female? How many of the men here are mostly vanilla guys disillusioned with vanilla females??? I have run into a few of them here..

Anaxagoras -> RE: Study: Women satisfied when their partner experiences displeasure! (3/10/2012 5:42:37 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: gigglecream oh the daily telegraph published some bullshit that infantilizes women. yes let us all discuss this issue with the gravity and dignity it deserves. farrrrttttttttttt The Daily Telegraph merely wrote an article about the study in Harvard. Indeed it could have misrepresented the research but the piece quoted the primary author, and at least it seems it represented her views quite accurately if the other piece kalikshama cited is anything to go by. Anyone can take what they want from the study. It's by no means a definitive portrait of what women do in relationships, it just pointed to an interesting behaviour trait which doesn't seem to have been discussed much before. I probably shouldn't have used the word "sadism" in the OP as its way too prejorative but its too late to edit it out now!

PeonForHer -> RE: Study: Women satisfied when their partner experiences displeasure! (3/10/2012 6:09:24 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Anaxagoras quote: ORIGINAL: gigglecream oh the daily telegraph published some bullshit that infantilizes women. yes let us all discuss this issue with the gravity and dignity it deserves. farrrrttttttttttt The Daily Telegraph merely wrote an article about the study in Harvard. Indeed it could have misrepresented the research but the piece quoted the primary author, and at least it seems it represented her views quite accurately if the other piece kalikshama cited is anything to go by. Anyone can take what they want from the study. It's by no means a definitive portrait of what women do in relationships, it just pointed to an interesting behaviour trait which doesn't seem to have been discussed much before. I probably shouldn't have used the word "sadism" in the OP as its way too prejorative but its too late to edit it out now! Poppycock. You've introduced this so-called research here because you hate women, Anax. I think we all know your type, you bald Irish goose-stepper, you. Well, I know which side my bread is buttered and I want to get laid at least once again before I die, so I'm having none of it.

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