Someone to 'play' with (Full Version)

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feedher2 -> Someone to 'play' with (3/19/2012 10:28:03 AM)

I want a sub to play with, 'play' in a similar context as 'i play Dungeons & Dragons' with them, or 'I play cards' I know some people are looking for a serious long term relationship, but i'm not.

I guess you could say i want a fuck-buddy who is into S&M.

Is there anyone like that out there? Or is everyone looking for someone to spend their life with?



mynxkat -> RE: Someone to 'play' with (3/19/2012 10:54:57 AM)

I don't doubt there are people out there looking for the same thing, but finding one, especially finding one even halfway local to you, is going to be rough.

Good luck, though.



DarkSteven -> RE: Someone to 'play' with (3/19/2012 11:10:13 AM)

Go to a play party. You will find women to play with, although sex will likely be off the table.

You also might be able to find a woman cheating on her husband who might be willing to entertain some kink.



MariaB -> RE: Someone to 'play' with (3/19/2012 11:23:55 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven


You also might be able to find a woman cheating on her husband who might be willing to entertain some kink.


Not sure I like the connotation behind that last remark. Are you relating fun play to desperate or deceitful promiscuous women?

To the op. I think there are plenty of people who think like you. Not everyone needs to be the 'Dom' or the 'submissive/slave'. Most who frequent the more elaborate fetish clubs tend to be thrill seekers with open adventurous minds but don't want to get stuck in any particular mind set.



IrishMist -> RE: Someone to 'play' with (3/19/2012 11:28:36 AM)

quote:

You also might be able to find a woman cheating on her husband who might be willing to entertain some kink.

Please tell me you did not just say that

[:o]




LaTigresse -> RE: Someone to 'play' with (3/19/2012 11:33:10 AM)

OP, I am going to suggest you get involved in your locale BDSM community. Less so as a horny troll looking to get laid but really get INVOLVED. You don't have to be in a relationship to be involved with a group. It's not likely to reap any 'fun' reward quickly, but will likely be more successful than........"Hi, I'm Dave, I want to beat, fuck and leave."

And I have to agree with Irish and Maria........rather beneath you Steven. At least I assume so.



LoreBook -> RE: Someone to 'play' with (3/19/2012 11:41:00 AM)

I am, or was (I think I found her!), looking for something along those lines - a regular long-term kinky FWB, or semi-casual setup. At this point in my life and exploration, play is really just a form of sex. At some point down the line I'll hope to find something more permanent, but just as I'm not really looking to get married right now, I'm not looking for a lifetime BDSM relationship either.

The preceding statement represents the views and opinions of the author and the author alone, and should in no way be considered an attempt by the author to define or determine anything for anybody but herself.




ProlificNeeds -> RE: Someone to 'play' with (3/19/2012 1:09:41 PM)

to the OP:
It is possible to find a long term relationship that is comprised of friendship, and play time, if you make it clear what you are looking for. I'm monogamous, but casual in almost all my relationships, and I make that clear to my partners. Most of them are perfectly cool with being relatively uncommited outside the bedroom.

You might want to re-evaluate what you want (and don't) and try to present that in a more attractive package and description other than, "I wanna fuck but not commit to you in any way". I am sure you can also provide friendship, and if you don;t intend to sleep around... then what is that other than a casual relationship? you fuck, you're friends... or do you just want a liscence to hop on multiple women? if so look for those in 'open relationships' meaning they are cool with you (and them) dating/playing with multiple people.

As always, best foot forward when seeking a play-mate or partner.



saltie -> RE: Someone to 'play' with (3/19/2012 1:12:19 PM)

Yes there is some who do just want to play. I am one of them. At first was kinky sex and now is just the kink.



Toppingfrmbottom -> RE: Someone to 'play' with (3/19/2012 1:41:27 PM)

When I was single I was into friends with benifits, they were fun while looking for a 24/7 partner. Now that I am in a commited long term relationship of 5 years , i'm not looking for anything other than good friends who like kink like we do, so that won't be a taboo topic an we can go to events together.



quote:

ORIGINAL: feedher2

I want a sub to play with, 'play' in a similar context as 'i play Dungeons & Dragons' with them, or 'I play cards' I know some people are looking for a serious long term relationship, but i'm not.

I guess you could say i want a fuck-buddy who is into S&M.

Is there anyone like that out there? Or is everyone looking for someone to spend their life with?




DarkSteven -> RE: Someone to 'play' with (3/19/2012 1:59:02 PM)

You folks are right. I laid an egg with this one. Misinformed AND unethical.

[sm=imsorry.gif]



IrishMist -> RE: Someone to 'play' with (3/19/2012 4:07:10 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

You folks are right. I laid an egg with this one. Misinformed AND unethical.

[sm=imsorry.gif]

[sm=applause.gif]
My faith in you has been redeemed
[:D]



RedMagic1 -> RE: Someone to 'play' with (3/19/2012 4:19:46 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: feedher2

I want a sub to play with, 'play' in a similar context as 'i play Dungeons & Dragons' with them, or 'I play cards' I know some people are looking for a serious long term relationship, but i'm not.

I guess you could say i want a fuck-buddy who is into S&M.

Is there anyone like that out there? Or is everyone looking for someone to spend their life with?

All long-term relationships start out as short-term relationships, unless you're in a culture that advocates arranged marriage. If women are 100% rejecting you, it may have more to do with your level of emotional maturity than the short-term you are offering.


Also, I thought DarkSteven's point was not far off the mark. There are a great many women who are married or otherwise attached to a vanilla, and they have his permission, or encouragement, to find a dom or a sub. That's definitely a pool one could date in "casually," and still be ethical.



kalikshama -> RE: Someone to 'play' with (3/19/2012 4:22:08 PM)

quote:

I guess you could say i want a fuck-buddy who is into S&M.


I did this when I lived in Florida and knew I was moving back to MA and didn't want any attachments. It was fun at first but I quickly got tired of driving home after a scene. Now I just commute from his bedroom to mine.



Alacrity -> RE: Someone to 'play' with (3/19/2012 5:07:43 PM)

Yes you can find what you are looking for, but the odds of finding that here is slim. Be very very very very patient, and always be clear what you are seeking. Beyond that do what another poster suggested and go to play parties, and other social events.

You might have better luck finding a vanilla fuck-buddy and [slowly?] introduce her to BDSM. This has worked for me.



TNDommeK -> RE: Someone to 'play' with (3/19/2012 5:28:17 PM)

Play parties are your friend.



hellionsLight -> RE: Someone to 'play' with (3/19/2012 5:58:30 PM)

I'm sure there is someone - good luck! :) Actually, I'm of mind that I can do 'play', non-sexually, with just a 'play partner'. We don't even have to be 'friends'. We can just see each other to play, and nothing else.




Baroana -> RE: Someone to 'play' with (3/19/2012 7:15:36 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: feedher2

I want a sub to play with, 'play' in a similar context as 'i play Dungeons & Dragons' with them, or 'I play cards' I know some people are looking for a serious long term relationship, but i'm not.

I guess you could say i want a fuck-buddy who is into S&M.

Is there anyone like that out there? Or is everyone looking for someone to spend their life with?


Hopefully you have something to offer tit for tat, because nobody gets something for nothing.



NiceButMeanGirl -> RE: Someone to 'play' with (3/19/2012 7:24:27 PM)

I used to have a kinky FWB when I was single, so I know it's possible. It might not just fall into your lap though and, to make it work, you both need to be on the same page as far as any rules go and both come out of each encounter satisfied.

NBMG



sunshinemiss -> RE: Someone to 'play' with (3/20/2012 5:49:40 AM)

It's not really difficult for women to find someone to get a little sumpin sumpin from. If you are looking for that, you may want to make sure you have something to grab her attention.

Playing can be different from sex for many people. Just bear that in mind.

And finally, come on. Lots of people have affairs. There are plenty of married women who would be interested in this. I expect the OP knows that. That doesn't really seem like a surprise to me. The only thing is that if one is having an affair, it can be dang difficult to play and leave no marks. I'm reminded of the scene in "Unfaithful" in which Olivier Martinez' character drew a tiny flower on Diane Lane's character's body. Tiny but caused some upset.

good luck,
sunshine



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