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What to do? - 4/6/2012 11:22:06 AM

HorneyBetty76

Posts: 6
Joined: 3/25/2012
Status: offline

I met a guy on here who is listed as being a Dom. He said he isn't looking for a slave, it sounds like he is. We talked a couple of times, he asked if I would be willing to move in with him. I said no, he lives in another state, I need to stay near my kids. However, everytime we talk he ask's again for me to move in with him. Each time giving it as an order and not a question.
I am thinking that maybe I should just stop talking to him? Tell him to go away, he is generally a nice guy.
Am I being to parinoid, or is he being to pushy?
In our last conversation he asked if I could ask around for a woman willing to move in with a guy. This is raising flags in my head, why would he ask me? We don't know eachother that well. Lastly he did inform me that he has genital warts, he has asked me not to tell anyone else, this is also raising flags in my head.

Post #: 1

RE: What to do? - 4/6/2012 11:34:21 AM

OsideGirl

Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline

You're an adult. You know the answers to these questions already. He's a putz.

_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to HorneyBetty76)

Post #: 2

RE: What to do? - 4/6/2012 11:44:14 AM

TNDommeK

Posts: 7153
Joined: 3/13/2010
Status: offline

Wow, um...what OsideGirl said is about the right answer.

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Our snark-nado needs more cowbell

(in reply to OsideGirl)

Post #: 3

RE: What to do? - 4/6/2012 11:49:00 AM

poise

Posts: 9509
Joined: 7/3/2010
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: HorneyBetty76
I am thinking that maybe I should just stop talking to him?
Tell him to go away, he is generally a nice guy.
Am I being to parinoid, or is he being to pushy?

What's there for you to be paranoid about? He is just a man on the other end of an
internet connection. It's not as though he can force you to move in with him.
If you enjoy spending time with him, continue. If you don't, then quit responding to him.

_____________________________

When the path ignites a soul, there’s no remaining in place.

(in reply to HorneyBetty76)

Post #: 4

RE: What to do? - 4/6/2012 11:50:00 AM

JeffBC

Posts: 5799
Joined: 2/12/2012
From: Canada
Status: offline

I met a guy on here who is listed as being a Dom.
I'm listed as being a dom on here also. That's because I checked the little box thingie that says "dom". Some people here would agree with that assessment. Others would not. Being "listed as a dom" is meaningless. "Being a dom in your assessment" is what matters.

He said he isn't looking for a slave, it sounds like he is.
*laughs* ALL guys are looking for a slave... or they think they are... until they manage to get one. More seriously, I say I'm not looking for a slave. I cmail bunches of subs and slaves here for various reasons. I'd be willing to bet that not a one of them thinks I actually am looking for a slave. You already know why that is. You already know why "it sounds like he is" for him.

We talked a couple of times, he asked if I would be willing to move in with him. I said no, he lives in another state, I need to stay near my kids. However, everytime we talk he ask's again for me to move in with him. Each time giving it as an order and not a question.
So... to recap that... he has several times ordered you to leave your children? The number of things that are tragically wrong with that are too numerous to count. But since you have already rejected multiple commands of his I have to assume you're not very enslaved by him.

I am thinking that maybe I should just stop talking to him? Tell him to go away, he is generally a nice guy.
Wait... you think a generally nice guy orders mothers to leave their children? Tell me about this word "nice" in whatever language you speak.

Am I being to parinoid, or is he being to pushy?
You're both being... uh.... Look, if you look at this story more closely you'll know what's going on... with both of you.

In our last conversation he asked if I could ask around for a woman willing to move in with a guy. This is raising flags in my head, why would he ask me? We don't know eachother that well.
I can speculate. It seems to be a mark of a male's dominance to be too wimpy to go find a woman on his own. The classic uber-master move is to get one slave to find other slaves for him. To me, it looks rather sad.

Lastly he did inform me that he has genital warts, he has asked me not to tell anyone else, this is also raising flags in my head.
So let me get this straight, you took on a personal confidence of another human and you were asked not to share it (which I'm presuming you agreed to), and now here you are telling us this? THAT is raising red flags in my head. Seriously? I cannot even imagine how angry, shocked and disappointed I'd be in Carol if she did that. As OsideGirl said, he's a putz. You, on the other hand... I could drag up some unfortunate words to describe what you just did. The fact that you didn't include his name, address and photo in your post doesn't change anything for me.

_____________________________

I'm a lover of "what is", not because I'm a spiritual person, but because it hurts when I argue with reality. -- Bryon Katie
"You're humbly arrogant" -- sunshinemiss
officially a member of the K Crowd

(in reply to HorneyBetty76)

Post #: 5

RE: What to do? - 4/6/2012 12:16:00 PM

ProlificNeeds

Posts: 1061
Joined: 5/19/2007
Status: offline

FR~

Triple what Oside said. He's a twit, move on to more sane prospects.

Also.. because I don't say it often enough: The internet is full of wankers.

(in reply to JeffBC)

Post #: 6

RE: What to do? - 4/6/2012 12:43:57 PM

DomMeinCT

Posts: 2355
Joined: 5/5/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: HorneyBetty76

I met a guy on here who is listed as being a Dom. He said he isn't looking for a slave, it sounds like he is. We talked a couple of times, he asked if I would be willing to move in with him. I said no, he lives in another state, I need to stay near my kids. However, everytime we talk he ask's again for me to move in with him. Each time giving it as an order and not a question.
I am thinking that maybe I should just stop talking to him? Tell him to go away, he is generally a nice guy.
Am I being to parinoid, or is he being to pushy?
In our last conversation he asked if I could ask around for a woman willing to move in with a guy. This is raising flags in my head, why would he ask me? We don't know eachother that well. Lastly he did inform me that he has genital warts, he has asked me not to tell anyone else, this is also raising flags in my head.

In real life (i.e. face-to-face) meetings you probably set limits to what you tolerate from people, so why are you having problems setting limits with an ONLINE STRANGER? Would you let someone who knocks on your door order you around?

Tell him (nicely) to knock it off and that you're no longer going to discuss moving to him nor finding him a woman now that you are ineligible due to distance. See how "nice" he is after that.

In our last conversation he asked if I could ask around for a woman willing to move in with a guy. This is raising flags in my head, why would he ask me?
Because he's a lazy shit and since he can't get you to move to him, he might as well ask you to find someone else for him.

Can you remind me again what part of this guy is "nice"?

With ALL the doms on this site, it seems you could do much better.

< Message edited by DomMeinCT -- 4/6/2012 12:45:18 PM >

_____________________________

The meeting of two personalities is like the contact of two chemical substances:
if there is any reaction, both are transformed.
~ Carl Jung

(in reply to HorneyBetty76)

Post #: 7

RE: What to do? - 4/6/2012 2:05:06 PM

risktaker9

Posts: 197
Joined: 3/10/2010
Status: offline

He sounds like someone I'd be completely uninterested in and would find laughable but that doesn't matter...what do you think? Is someone who is 'generally a nice guy' adequate enough for you or do you want something more?

Yes, to me, he raises several serious red flags, it's bizarre to say the least to think he'd be interested in moving in with a stranger and to push for it constantly. Finding other women for him is incredibly lazy and the warts thing- well I don't think it matters much who you tell on the internet, like they're going to connect it to him in real life, but do you want a case of genital warts? It is transmissible to yourself.

(in reply to HorneyBetty76)

Post #: 8

RE: What to do? - 4/6/2012 3:02:26 PM

littlewonder

Posts: 15659
Status: offline

Would you jump off a bridge if he told you to?
Would you look for someone else to jump off the bridge if he told you to?

Seriously? <shakes head>

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Nothing has changed
Everything has changed

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Post #: 9

RE: What to do? - 4/6/2012 3:03:28 PM

mnottertail

Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
Status: offline

Well, I goddamn sure aint jumpin off the bridge, so I guess I would throw somebody else off if it had to come to that....

Jus sayin

_____________________________

Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30

(in reply to littlewonder)

Post #: 10

RE: What to do? - 4/6/2012 3:08:00 PM

JstAnotherSub

Posts: 6174
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: HorneyBetty76

I met a guy on here who is listed as being a Dom. He said he isn't looking for a slave, it sounds like he is. We talked a couple of times, he asked if I would be willing to move in with him. I said no, he lives in another state, I need to stay near my kids. However, everytime we talk he ask's again for me to move in with him. Each time giving it as an order and not a question.
I am thinking that maybe I should just stop talking to him? Tell him to go away, he is generally a nice guy.
Am I being to parinoid, or is he being to pushy?
In our last conversation he asked if I could ask around for a woman willing to move in with a guy. This is raising flags in my head, why would he ask me? We don't know eachother that well. Lastly he did inform me that he has genital warts, he has asked me not to tell anyone else, this is also raising flags in my head.

I don't mean to be rude, but how old are you?

Read your post, and, if the answer does not become clear to you, well....the voices in your head are smarter than the twitching of yer vagina.

_____________________________

yep

(in reply to HorneyBetty76)

Post #: 11

RE: What to do? - 4/6/2012 3:27:47 PM

risktaker9

Posts: 197
Joined: 3/10/2010
Status: offline

Ok, I went to your profile and I have to say....I'm confounded as to why you are even here asking about him. For instance you list on your profile that the person you are looking for should be drug and disease free....then why are you even talking to a guy with g. warts? You also state that the two most important things in your life are your kids and finishing school...then why even talk to a guy who wants you to move immediately? I honestly don't get it, why even consider someone who fails the only two criteria that you list? And you say your'e not looking for a master?

Let me turn it around...why would you ever be interested in this guy at all? He isn't right for you in anything that you want, and he sounds like a noodle head to boot. Are you honestly that desperate? It seems like it, I'm not being rude but it truly seems as though you are grasping at anything here that shows interest. I'd say you could find a much better match than this, heck according to what you say you want, there should be tons of guys who would fit the bill better.

(in reply to HorneyBetty76)

Post #: 12

RE: What to do? - 4/6/2012 3:38:21 PM

kalikshama

Posts: 14805
Joined: 8/8/2010
Status: offline

quote:

I am thinking that maybe I should just stop talking to him? Tell him to go away, he is generally a nice guy.

Wait... you think a generally nice guy orders mothers to leave their children? Tell me about this word "nice" in whatever language you speak.

Ya, I would have chalked him up as a twit not worth the pixels awhile ago.

(in reply to JeffBC)

Post #: 13

RE: What to do? - 4/6/2012 3:39:36 PM

Baroana

Posts: 1480
Joined: 11/13/2011
Status: offline

Sorry to be so harsh, but uh.... the fact that the OP is a non-custodial mother trips my mental instability detector.

Well, that, and the rest of the insanity contained in the post.

< Message edited by Baroana -- 4/6/2012 3:43:35 PM >

(in reply to risktaker9)

Post #: 14

RE: What to do? - 4/6/2012 3:45:31 PM

kalikshama

Posts: 14805
Joined: 8/8/2010
Status: offline

I've noticed my bias in this area - I judge non-custodial women more harshly and custodial men more positively.

(in reply to Baroana)

Post #: 15

RE: What to do? - 4/6/2012 3:49:02 PM

Baroana

Posts: 1480
Joined: 11/13/2011
Status: offline

If a mom doesn't have at least 50% custody of her kids, there's usually something quite wrong with the picture. The same may or may not be true of the father, but many states do not yet give them equal consideration in these matters.

(in reply to kalikshama)

Post #: 16

RE: What to do? - 4/6/2012 3:50:30 PM

tsatske

Posts: 2037
Joined: 3/9/2007
From: Louisville, KY
Status: offline

And yet, just like men, women can lose custody for all kinds of reasons, even simply - they ex had a better lawyer. But, the OP says she is un-relocatable due to her children. She should quit talking to anyone who orders her to move in with him, copletely ignoring her needs. Then an order to 'find me a woman', along with being lazy and stupid, further re-inforces that he doesn't care at all about your needs, or any woman's needs - doesn't even care if he is a good match for the woman - as long as he gets his needs met. No, he doesn't sound like an all around nice guy.

_____________________________

“If you never did you should. These things are fun and fun is good”
~Dr. Seuss quote

(in reply to kalikshama)

Post #: 17

RE: What to do? - 4/6/2012 4:47:34 PM

RedMagic1

Posts: 6470
Joined: 5/10/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Baroana

If a mom doesn't have at least 50% custody of her kids, there's usually something quite wrong with the picture. The same may or may not be true of the father, but many states do not yet give them equal consideration in these matters.

Completely off topic, but, Baroana, who is in your avatar, if you don't mind?

_____________________________

Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

(in reply to Baroana)

Post #: 18

RE: What to do? - 4/6/2012 4:50:11 PM

Baroana

Posts: 1480
Joined: 11/13/2011
Status: offline

It's a painting of a Romanian baroness.

(in reply to RedMagic1)

Post #: 19

RE: What to do? - 4/6/2012 5:03:32 PM

DarkSteven

Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline

OP, I counted three red flags in the post you wrote. Why wait for more to show up?

_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to Baroana)

Post #: 20

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