Topping from the bottom-vs-ideas (Full Version)

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion



Message

dogobedience -> Topping from the bottom-vs-ideas (6/4/2006 7:50:58 PM)

I am constantly learning, I lead by example and seek out and accept ideas and comments FROM ANYONE. The other day a girl made a comment to me on an email, it was good advise, she then began to rant about topping from the bottom. To me it was like my PA saying something great, then becomming the boss........yea right! To accept advise is one thing, to let YOUR girl attempt to control you is another.

Many girls attempt this in one way or another, topping from the bottom. Doms who are weak/new/careless/stupid/in it for only kinky sex, will never know and or care!! 

I believe upon the first attempt to top from the bottom a good dom NEEDS TO TAKE CHARGE. The girls need that, otherwise you are shown to be weak.

Comments/ideas/rants/replies   



dogobedience -> RE: Topping from the bottom-vs-ideas (6/4/2006 7:55:00 PM)

To sum it up taking ideas is great, it is different than not being in control.



leakylee -> RE: Topping from the bottom-vs-ideas (6/4/2006 8:07:42 PM)

Maybe this is a no brainer, maybe not. But the whole topping from the bottom concept is one that I never truly got. Me thinks I might glean something on this one..

thank you
love and light
lee



CrappyDom -> RE: Topping from the bottom-vs-ideas (6/4/2006 8:21:39 PM)

If you are shopping for advice, try this free tidbit.  Try dropping the act...rather than sitting their sounding like a pompous ass and thumping your chest.  That works in chat rooms but you have people here who have been doing this since before you hit puberty and just might already know this simple minded prattle you keep posting.

Of course, I am just in this for the kinky sex and cheap thrills!



Tikkiee -> RE: Topping from the bottom-vs-ideas (6/4/2006 8:27:07 PM)

Well hell; the only reason why I am in it is for the kink.
 
/shrug
 
Such a shame that in the last 5 years Chris could not become a manly man like you and take charge of me.
 
What in the world were we thinking? [&:]



enigmabrat -> RE: Topping from the bottom-vs-ideas (6/4/2006 8:28:48 PM)

LOL
Topping from the bottom is one of the funniest things ever because it doesnt realy exist just because a sub says something or does something that may seem as takeing charge well.. Ill sbhut up befor I cause trouble



dogobedience -> RE: Topping from the bottom-vs-ideas (6/4/2006 8:40:59 PM)

I love a dom ATTEMPTING to top from the bottom as well.........nice



dogobedience -> RE: Topping from the bottom-vs-ideas (6/4/2006 8:46:18 PM)

Dom's what do you do when this is attempted on you. For most it happens only in the early stages, the trial part on both parties. If the girl has any experience she will try, even if by accident.

How do YOU take control. 



Lashra -> RE: Topping from the bottom-vs-ideas (6/4/2006 8:46:28 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: CrappyDom

If you are shopping for advice, try this free tidbit.  Try dropping the act...rather than sitting their sounding like a pompous ass and thumping your chest.  That works in chat rooms but you have people here who have been doing this since before you hit puberty and just might already know this simple minded prattle you keep posting.

Of course, I am just in this for the kinky sex and cheap thrills!

Wow and I thought it was just my nerves he was starting to get on with the girls this and the girls that. THUMP THUMP Glad I'm not alone [;)]

Gimme dat kinky sex and cheap thrills boys..

And yes you must teach boys not to attempt to Top from the bottom otherwise boys think they have the upper hand then you have to take a blackjack and pop the boys in the back of their damn head to get the boys attention and show him who the boss really is. Otherwise boys can be quite stubborn and boys well, they must be put in a boys place.

~Lashra



dogobedience -> RE: Topping from the bottom-vs-ideas (6/4/2006 8:50:29 PM)

Not sure if that was toward me, if so, oh well............if not, then he has a right to his opinion AS DO I.

Relax, smile, have fun, I DO.  



BitaTruble -> RE: Topping from the bottom-vs-ideas (6/4/2006 8:59:12 PM)

I've always been of the firm belief that if you can't take the whip out of my hand, I am going to beat you with it. Is that topping from the bottom? I guess it depends on perspective. If someone wants me to bottom to them, they'll need to get the permission of Himself (who won't give permission for that activity).. and I don't submit to anyone but Himself and while I truly believe he would be perfect if he were an S/m switch and an M/s Master, I accept his flaws [8D] and am content to practice my sadism on those who allow it. I'm what you could term.. spunky.. although not bratty in anyway because my spunky personality is all for his entertainment. As soon as the line is crossed, he pulls me back to exactly where he wants me and with him it doesn't take much pulling because I want him to be pleased with me. I keep him laughing, so I figure it's all good.

Celeste



Vancouver_cinful -> RE: Topping from the bottom-vs-ideas (6/4/2006 10:15:20 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: BitaTruble

I've always been of the firm belief that if you can't take the whip out of my hand, I am going to beat you with it. Is that topping from the bottom?


ROFLMAO You and me both. Anybody can claim to be a dom and bark orders, but I got the Teacher Look and that trumps Pompous Ass Bark anyday.



HarryVanWinkle -> RE: Topping from the bottom-vs-ideas (6/5/2006 12:45:12 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: CrappyDom

Of course, I am just in this for the kinky sex and cheap thrills!


Why is it that on a website for perverts so many people seem to have something against kinky sex and cheap thrills?



juliaoceania -> RE: Topping from the bottom-vs-ideas (6/5/2006 1:15:26 AM)

you know what gets on my nerves? Doms who bottom from the top....

Really people should just relax and enjoy their partner whether they be on top or bottom. Maybe some think this is a vanilla idea, but all this sooooo serious "I am the dom and you shall bow wow before me" is a little tiresome. I know my role, he knows his... this is a given... now lets just play and when we aren't playing then lets be there for each other. Gosh, it doesnt have to be analyzed like this does it?

I know this may sound strange, but some doms actually ask their subs how they feel, what they wanna do, what they think.. it isnt a sign of weakness for crying out loud,... it is how their dynamic works... If a dom likes his sub to top once in awhile from the bottom whats it to you? Are you the lifestyle cop? Does it make them any less D/s that they communicate differently than you chose to? Who decides when the line is crossed between giving ideas and topping from the bottom? Do you have some topping from the bottom checklist or something? Enough, I got an email to write before I hit the sack, peace.



irishbynature -> RE: Topping from the bottom-vs-ideas (6/5/2006 1:56:00 AM)

This has been an issue for me. In the past, I've attempted to "top from the bottom" to get my way and recognized that I was using it to be manipulative. Also, I recognized that perhaps my former did not realize my needs or else I wouldn't have been playing those kinds of games. I would hope that a (future)Dom would work with me on that issue. It me, it was a bad habit, period.[8D]
*smiles*
Irish 



timeoutgurlie -> RE: Topping from the bottom-vs-ideas (6/5/2006 2:05:41 AM)

I have no idea how you personally separate the two, what's your defining line in the sand?

I'd think with every person this standard would be different.

Personally, I know my place and would never step outside of it out of respect for him and the fact that he is my Master because he's earned that title.  However, if I ever feel that he is not working in my best interest and is not caring for & protecting me as I feel he should and as he promised to...I'm not going to abide by my promise to obey him.

As his slave, I've chosen to submit to him because I trust him enough to, and if I'd have to 'top' and take control...obciously that means I feel liek he's showing me he can't be responsible for me any longer.  I'd  head toward a release if the situation lasted more than I could tolerate; make my feelings known to him, see if things change, and either stay or leave.



Sirandlittle1 -> RE: Topping from the bottom-vs-ideas (6/5/2006 2:13:20 AM)

Well, he maybe spouting crap, but its commonly held crap. This sounds like its just out of a 'how to' book. What works in one relationship, is THEIR interpretation of D/s or M/s or whatever! It wont work that way for the next couple. Your knowledge is only current time period only.
So nobody, can say 'this is the true way' but they can share their own subjective experience of this lifestyle. It was once, with one particular couple, the right way.
little1



darkinshadows -> RE: Topping from the bottom-vs-ideas (6/5/2006 2:18:40 AM)

You say topping from the bottom like its a bad thing.
 
I would suggest you are confusing t-f-b with a submissive personalities testing of limits.  Yup - newsflash - even Dominants types have limits.  I often find that dominant personalities who profess to know 'Topping from below' are usually only doing so out of frustration at not being able to control the situation they are in themselves.  And they often define dominants who they assume are topped from below as weak or new or careless or 'just in it for the kink'.  So what if someone is in it for the kink... does that make them less of a person?
 
A good dominant personality doesn't need to take charge - a s-type will submit - pure and simple.  If your suffering from a lack of ability to control a person, it is because they haven't submitted to you.  That isn't a sign of weakness, thats just a fact.
 
Oh, and for your information, not all s-types are girls.  Many are women.  Many are Men.  And equally - there are some boys as well...
 
Peace and Rapture



timeoutgurlie -> RE: Topping from the bottom-vs-ideas (6/5/2006 2:18:50 AM)

Personally, I think he felt a lil emasculated (spelling, sorry [&:]) and now he's tripping on this like it's the girl's issue?

I don't personally believe he *should* feel this way, I believe a good individual is constantly learning and accepting, and to take advice or listen to others can only benefit you.  I can't explain it, I just get a vibe like it turned into a blow to the ego and the walls of defense came up ad turned it into a match of good sub vs. sub who wants to Top.



Reflectivesoul -> RE: Topping from the bottom-vs-ideas (6/5/2006 2:21:03 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: CrappyDom

If you are shopping for advice, try this free tidbit.  Try dropping the act...rather than sitting their sounding like a pompous ass and thumping your chest.  That works in chat rooms but you have people here who have been doing this since before you hit puberty and just might already know this simple minded prattle you keep posting.

Of course, I am just in this for the kinky sex and cheap thrills!



*applauds n exits*



Page: [1] 2   next >   >>

Valid CSS!




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy
2.929688E-02