Doesn't it get dull?

Doesn't it get dull? (Full Version)

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becca333 -> Doesn't it get dull? (6/5/2006 6:38:57 AM)
In my never-ending quest for knowledge: I've been reading up on aspects of BDSM that I haven't got round to trying yet. I've had great fun with some of the noisier, busier activities (sitting carefully at the moment - gotta love that cane!), but when I read about ropes and tying up, I have a few questions. I read (on another site) about bondage activities, and the fun of being tied up. The person who posted was tied up in what sounded to me like a rather awkward position, and.... left there. Um.... doesn't that get dull? I mean, being tied up or handcuffed while other delicious things are done to you - that's fun. But what's the attraction about being tied up, or put in a cage, and just left there? It just sounds boring to me. So what am I missing?

enigmabrat -> RE: Doesn't it get dull? (6/5/2006 6:41:02 AM)
I love beeing tied up and havething things done to me though I would never let a Dom tie me up and just leave me there I am tied up while in play no other time

kittensmailbox -> RE: Doesn't it get dull? (6/5/2006 6:43:42 AM)
NO ONE should ever be left alone while in bondage, NEVER EVER... that is huge red flag if it happens....

LuckyAlbatross -> RE: Doesn't it get dull? (6/5/2006 6:44:51 AM)
Nothing. If it's not for you, it's not for you. Personally I find most needle scenes I see to be pretty dull. http://www.collarchat.com/m_353503/mpage_1/key_process%252Cbound/tm.htm#353815 Japanese Rope Bondage The act of the tying IS the scene for me. It's using your skill and your hands to directly connect and bind someone into your bonds. It can be a slow long sensuous process, feeling the rope slither, slide, burn, tighten, and take the submissive away from the normal world and into the bound world. It's like anything- some people really get into it and some people don't. As Bita said- it doesn't HAVE to take a long time, depending on what you're going for. Not all scenes are about having access to their sex parts or their physical body. http://www.collarchat.com/m_380593/mpage_1/key_serenity%2Cbondage/tm.htm totally bound and free Reposted: Some people, especially women, need to feel like they are either forced into something, unable to resist, or completely out of control, BEFORE they can allow themselves to truly "let go" inside and do what they really enjoy without the burden of guilt. Bondage is a ready made device for this sort of thing. I do feel free in bondage, but it's more just a serenity. It's a feeling of "this is where I need to be right now and all is well with the world." It's actually one of the worst ways to get me turned on as it calms me down so much!

LuckyAlbatross -> RE: Doesn't it get dull? (6/5/2006 6:46:23 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: kittensmailbox NO ONE should ever be left alone while in bondage, NEVER EVER... that is huge red flag if it happens.... As usual you are being hyperbolistic. It's up to everyone what risks you take, but I've been in cages for awhile alone, I've been in chains and left alone, I've put bottoms in manacles and left them alone. I don't recommend leaving someone alone for a long time, and I don't recommend leaving them alone if they are being suspended or severly mummified...but as always there's a level of reasonability.

fullofgrace -> RE: Doesn't it get dull? (6/5/2006 6:46:48 AM)
He would not restrain me and leave me for prolonged periods of time, i don't think; He never has and He doesn't show any proclivity towards it. if He chose to, i'd do it, but the thought doesn't excite me. and i'm not a cage kind of girl...they freak me out, though i'd do it if i was asked. maybe a dom or master who enjoys tying women up or caging them and leaving them for a bit can explain why they enjoy doing so...as well as submissives who enjoy it. because now you've got me curious about it :) i know for some submissives and slaves, though, it's something they'd be willing to do because it's what their dominant or master wants. and then, some negotiate this as out of the question from the get go.

mnottertail -> RE: Doesn't it get dull? (6/5/2006 6:50:12 AM)
One of the aspects that is found pleasant is the swaddling feeling. Many like to contemplate at these moments. The other class that likes tying and left alone are the eels (little houdini wannabes, who enjoy trying to escape....) Many things in the hearts and minds of women............ The Shadow knows........... Ron

kittensmailbox -> RE: Doesn't it get dull? (6/5/2006 6:52:26 AM)
Wow luckyAlbatross, nice personal attack on me, for whatever reason.... it is my belief and how i was trained for the past 15 years... But thank you so much for making my training and beliefs less meaningful then yours...

trippingdaisy -> RE: Doesn't it get dull? (6/5/2006 6:52:59 AM)
i have been tied and left, and i can try to explain why i enjoyed it. [:)] (As a side note: i wasn't actually 'left'. i was blindfolded, and i had earplugs in. i could not see or hear if i was alone or not. It certainly felt like it, even though i never truly was.) If you like feeling helpless, then you may enjoy it. That was the thrill of it for me...the act of the tying itself, then the knowledge that i had no idea how long i'd be left, what was going to happen to me (if anything)...things like that. i was utterly helpless, and that was actually one of the very first times i slipped into sub-space. It may be something you might want to try, just to see if it sparks something in you, but it doesn't for everyone. Just for clarification...is this just a binding situation you're asking about, or is it binding and suspension?

becca333 -> RE: Doesn't it get dull? (6/5/2006 6:53:40 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross It's up to everyone what risks you take, but I've been in cages for awhile alone, I've been in chains and left alone, I've put bottoms in manacles and left them alone. I don't recommend leaving someone alone for a long time, and I don't recommend leaving them alone if they are being suspended or severly mummified...but as always there's a level of reasonability. What do you do while you're there alone? Are you supposed to think about something, or do you go into some kind of subspace?

sweetbbwsub31 -> RE: Doesn't it get dull? (6/5/2006 6:54:32 AM)
Being in bondage and left for short periods of time excites me. When is he coming back? What is he doing? What will he do to me when he returns? I am utterly helpless and at his mercy. Delicious! If I were left for long periods of time I suppose I would feel very differently about it. But who knows.. I may be missing something. sub tara

becca333 -> RE: Doesn't it get dull? (6/5/2006 6:55:51 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: trippingdaisy Just for clarification...is this just a binding situation you're asking about, or is it binding and suspension? I don't think I'm brave enough for suspension. I'd spend the whole time worrying that it was all going to go horribly wrong.

kittensmailbox -> RE: Doesn't it get dull? (6/5/2006 6:56:24 AM)
See now that would be a cool thing, that i can agree with and has done as well... It is a thrill...

ownedgirlie -> RE: Doesn't it get dull? (6/5/2006 6:57:57 AM)
It depends on how you are left, for how long, and what it does to your mind. Sometimes being placed in a difficult position or scenario (not necessarily bondage) and left alone in it can be incredibly difficult, and the slave must remain put to work through the places her mind takes her. If she depends on her Master as intensely as I depend on mine, for example, she may have to draw on her inner strength to get her through this, thus realizing how strong she is to begin with. He isn't there to give her comfort or reassurance, and she must look into herself to feel him for such things. What if you don't know how long it will be until he returns? This can get a little scary, and you will have to draw on your trust for him. You may even question it. You may be bored at first...then frustrated...then angry...then frightened...then horribly uncomfortable yet unable to do a thing about it...only to come to a place where you feel your submission more deeply than ever. We see here all time where people respond differently from one another to different scenarios. What is effective for some is ineffective for others. A good Dom/Master will probably know in advance how his sub/slave will react and will choose to do something like that based on his knowledge of her.

trippingdaisy -> RE: Doesn't it get dull? (6/5/2006 7:03:55 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: becca333 I don't think I'm brave enough for suspension. I'd spend the whole time worrying that it was all going to go horribly wrong. Haha, i totally understand that. i'm utterly TERRIFIED of heights and falling. i couldn't ever, ever do suspension. However, i've seen a few scenes that included subs that were new to suspension, and very nervous...the Dom actually adjusted the scene to make her feel more comfortable, and lifted her off the ground only about a foot. She felt more secure in not being hurt if she indeed did fall. If you ever DO decide to try suspension, i highly suggest doing it with Someone who is willing to do just that for you. :)

twicehappy -> RE: Doesn't it get dull? (6/5/2006 7:06:56 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: enigmabrat though I would never let a Dom tie me up and just leave me there I am tied up while in play no other time While it may not be for you and the Dom/Domme should be keeping an eye on you for safety reasons, being tied up and ignored is a form of play. As to your "i would never let" comment; you had better be damn sure about the dom as once that final shackle is locked what you are going to allow is out of your control. You might also consider the fact that submitting has a lot to do with doing as the Dom wishes, not him doing what you want(with of course regards to hard limits and safety or health issues).

LuckyAlbatross -> RE: Doesn't it get dull? (6/5/2006 7:11:47 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: becca333 What do you do while you're there alone? Are you supposed to think about something, or do you go into some kind of subspace? Most of the time it was that they either had to go to the bathroom, go grab something that was somewhere else, or an objectification scene (ie you're my property and I'm putting you on the shelf now that I'm done with you). Sometimes it's exciting, sometimes it's serene, and sometimes it IS boring (but only in cages, never been bored in rope bondage).

becca333 -> RE: Doesn't it get dull? (6/5/2006 7:12:57 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: trippingdaisy quote: ORIGINAL: becca333 I don't think I'm brave enough for suspension. I'd spend the whole time worrying that it was all going to go horribly wrong. Haha, i totally understand that. i'm utterly TERRIFIED of heights and falling. i couldn't ever, ever do suspension. However, i've seen a few scenes that included subs that were new to suspension, and very nervous...the Dom actually adjusted the scene to make her feel more comfortable, and lifted her off the ground only about a foot. She felt more secure in not being hurt if she indeed did fall. If you ever DO decide to try suspension, i highly suggest doing it with Someone who is willing to do just that for you. :) One of the reasons I'm wary of things like suspension is that my Dom is kind of challenged when it comes to tools and such. He's wonderful in so many ways, but if I'm going to be tied up I'd feel safer on the ground.

CrappyDom -> RE: Doesn't it get dull? (6/5/2006 7:34:47 AM)
There are many great posts about why bondage is hot. If you have ever seen good Japanese style bondage it can make a person (especially with verbal cues from the top) feel like a giant beautifully wrapped present. Combine that with the sensuousness so clearly described in LA's post, the constant feeling of your masters ropes around you like his arms encircling you, his stepping back and looking at you admiringly, and when you see yourself in those lovely bonds, you have a visual representation of both him, his love/lust for you wrapped around your body.

CrappyDom -> RE: Doesn't it get dull? (6/5/2006 7:40:12 AM)
Bondage safety - Jay Wiseman's book on bondage spends almost a third of its length on safety. Why? Because Jay has a fetish for safety, Midori's book which has far more strenous positions in it, spends a page or two. The only common injury in S&M are broken hearts and way down the list, STDs. Now I wouldn't tie someone up for the first time and leave them, too many chances of hidden emotional landmines and or the need for common reassurance. However, if it is someone I either know to be very experienced or whom I have experience with, I can and have left them alone.

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