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aldente -> Hello all (5/2/2012 1:32:52 PM)
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i've been a member on collarme for 6 years now.... so this being my self-introduction is probably a little past-due.
i'm in Malaysia (which probably explains the 6 years) and when i started looking for a BDSM partner i was a young, unattached man. i'm not so young or unattached anymore but i'm still looking! i'm neither Master nor sub and i'm all for equality between partners in the home.
However there is this contradicting urge to dominate a willing slave or surrender totally to a Domme who has won my respect and admiration. i have no desire to be my wife's Master, and no desire for her to be my Domme.... and while 24x7 power exchange for a period of time would be great, i don't want to live the rest of my life that way.
Schizophrenic? Maybe... but i am what i am and i can't change that. i apologize if this offends anybody's sensitivities but i've lost 6 years trying to find a balance and there isn't one.... and i'm done stifling either one part or the other of myself for no other reason than some would find it offensive.
Apart from an online BDSM relationship with a Domme halfway across the world who disappeared into the internet one fine day, i have no experience whatsoever..... and i do know that former subs who have paid their dues make the best Masters..... so yeah... creaky and old as i am nowadays, i guess i'm still looking for a Domme who can gain my respect and take me has Her own and train me so we can both find fulfillment that way...... and see where it goes. Maybe it lasts a while before we both move on.... or maybe i'll be Hers for so long as i can bend over without popping a hip..... it goes where it goes.
Anybody seen anyone like that lately? All help much appreciated!
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