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money issues - 5/16/2012 4:11:46 PM   
GoreanLadycat


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I have been approached by several men recently who seem to want to pay me to own them. My philosophy is that if I take money from you, that makes you my boss, so it's NOT going to happen....but why are they even offering?
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RE: money issues - 5/16/2012 4:24:13 PM   
Lockit


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They want to be your kinky boss, pretending you are their boss. OR They want to get you excited about getting some money so they can get something you wouldn't normally do before paying.

Silly, but I happen to think most things they do are silly. I just laugh and block, no need to understand them... its all about their excitement.

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RE: money issues - 5/16/2012 4:31:20 PM   
littlewonder


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my experiences when men on here approached me in that fashion?

They see women on a bdsm site as prostitutes who they can pay to fuck them.

Like I said, that's just been my experience in the past when such men replied to me.


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RE: money issues - 5/16/2012 6:21:47 PM   
DesFIP


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Ii wish I could link you to Rochsub's amazing post on this subject.
However, in a nutshell, money is power. By giving you money, they feel they are giving you their power.

As you don't share this viewpoint, you aren't compatible with them.

< Message edited by DesFIP -- 5/16/2012 6:22:45 PM >


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RE: money issues - 5/16/2012 7:50:18 PM   
GoreanLadycat


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Thank you all. I was pretty sure there was an incompatibility, but was trying to understand. I
want devotion, not denominations.....

(in reply to DesFIP)
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RE: money issues - 5/17/2012 1:35:32 AM   
bostondom55


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well, if you take money from them and have anything resembling a sex act with them you are technically a prostitute and in most places that is against the law...

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RE: money issues - 5/17/2012 4:36:43 AM   
Greta75


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quote:

ORIGINAL: bostondom55

well, if you take money from them and have anything resembling a sex act with them you are technically a prostitute and in most places that is against the law...

What are housewives then? They take money from their husbands and have sex with them.
So what if the domme is a full time stay at home, and her sub works to feed both of them?

< Message edited by Greta75 -- 5/17/2012 4:37:48 AM >

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RE: money issues - 5/27/2012 8:47:42 AM   
Travelinman


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People need different things. If someone offers money and you need it, and are willing to do what the offerer wants, then everyone is ok. Whether it is a marital situation, dating, or an escort is only a label for the context. It is the agreement that counts.

Now if you do not want money, then simply say so. While this may change the dynamics, it does not change the people involved. Before being offended by an offer of money, ask what was the reason for the same. It may only be an attempted act of generosity.

(in reply to Greta75)
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RE: money issues - 5/27/2012 10:17:49 AM   
TNDommeK


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quote:

ORIGINAL: bostondom55

well, if you take money from them and have anything resembling a sex act with them you are technically a prostitute and in most places that is against the law...

Did you come up with that all by yourself???




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RE: money issues - 6/5/2012 5:11:32 AM   
Master2811


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quote:

ORIGINAL: GoreanLadycat

I have been approached by several men recently who seem to want to pay me to own them. My philosophy is that if I take money from you, that makes you my boss, so it's NOT going to happen....but why are they even offering?


That is a new fashion. Moneyslaves. They seem to like it to pamper a Domme or Mistress. Some of them are willing to spend a substantial amount of their monthly paycheck with or without gifts such as jewelry, flowers and so on. Some Dommes/Mistresses achieve it to live totally on money from different moneyslaves. It's reasonably harmless if the moneyslave only spends the money he can actually afford to miss and does not overdo it like with gambling.

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RE: money issues - 6/5/2012 7:02:35 AM   
Master2811


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Greta75

quote:

ORIGINAL: bostondom55

well, if you take money from them and have anything resembling a sex act with them you are technically a prostitute and in most places that is against the law...

What are housewives then? They take money from their husbands and have sex with them.
So what if the domme is a full time stay at home, and her sub works to feed both of them?


That is an odd comparision. Normally the housewife cooks, cleans, does the laundry, goes shopping and so on. If she gets money it is salary.

(in reply to Greta75)
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RE: money issues - 6/5/2012 12:53:57 PM   
kalikshama


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quote:

ORIGINAL: TNDommeK

quote:

ORIGINAL: bostondom55

well, if you take money from them and have anything resembling a sex act with them you are technically a prostitute and in most places that is against the law...

Did you come up with that all by yourself???


We say that slavery has vanished from European civilization, but this is not true. Slavery still exists, but now it applies only to women and its name is prostitution.

VICTOR HUGO, Les Misérables

To the moralist prostitution does not consist so much in the fact that the woman sells her body, but rather that she sells it out of wedlock.

EMMA GOLDMAN, Anarchism and Other Essays

What is marriage but prostitution to one man instead of many?

ANGELA CARTER, Nights at the Circus

Marriage is for woman the commonest mode of livelihood, and the total amount of undesired sex endured by women is probably greater in marriage than in prostitution.

BERTRAND RUSSELL, Marriage and Morals

There are 80,000 prostitutes in London alone and what are they, if not bloody sacrifices on the altar of monogamy?

ARTHUR SCHOPENHAUER, "On Women," Studies in Pessimism

Prostitution exists today because women are objectified sexually, and because it is considered more permissible for men than for women to have purely sexual experiences.

RUTH MAZO KARRAS, Common Women

If nobody wants to sell sex, it is a crime to force anyone to do so. But when men or women do want to sell their bodies, they should have that full right without encountering punishment or discrimination. If the client behaves decently, the relationship between the sex buyer and the sex seller must be considered a purely private transaction.

NILS JOHAN RINGDAL, Love For Sale

I'd rather be in Las Vegas 104 degrees than New York 90 degrees, you know why? Legalized prostitution. In any weather that takes the edge off.

RAY ROMANO, Dr. Katz, Professional Therapist

Grown men should not be having sex with prostitutes unless they are married to them.

JERRY FALWELL, Crossfire, May 17, 1997

Prostitution is criminal, and bad things happen because it's run illegally by dirt-bags who are criminals. If it's legal, then the girls could have health checks, unions, benefits, anything any other worker gets, and it would be far better.

JESSE VENTURA, Playboy interview, Nov. 1999

Butterfield 8, with its call-girl heroine working her way down the alphabet of men from Amherst to Yale, appeared at a very formative moment in my adolescence and impressed me forever with the persona of the prostitute, whom I continue to revere. The prostitute is not, as feminists claim, the victim of men, but rather their conqueror, an outlaw, who controls the sexual channels between nature and culture.

CAMILLE PAGLIA, Vamps and Tramps

Prostitution will always lead into a moral quagmire in democratic societies with capitalist economies; it invades the terrain of intimate sexual relations yet beckons for regulation. A society's response to prostitution goes to the core of how it chooses between the rights of some persons and the protection of others.

BARBARA MEIL HOBSON, Uneasy Virtue

Nowhere is woman treated according to the merit of her work, but rather as a sex. It is therefore almost inevitable that she should pay for her right to exist, to keep a position in whatever line, with sex favors. Thus it is merely a question of degree whether she sells herself to one man, in or out of marriage, or to many men!... The economic and social inferiority of woman is responsible for prostitution.

EMMA GOLDMAN, Feminism

Prostitution is not just a service industry, mopping up the overflow of male demand, which always exceeds female supply. Prostitution testifies to the amoral power struggle of sex.... Prostitutes, pornographers, and their patrons are marauders in the forest of archaic night.

CAMILLE PAGLIA, Sexual Personae

Prostitution reinforces all the old dumb clichés about women’s sexuality; that they are not built to enjoy sex and are little more than walking masturbation aids, things to be DONE TO, things so sensually null and void that they have to be paid to indulge in fornication, that women can be had, bought, as often as not sold from one man to another. When the sex war is won prostitutes should be shot as collaborators for their terrible betrayal of all women.

JULIE BURCHILL, "Born Again Cows," Damaged Gods

The only way to stop this trafficking in and profiting from the use of women's bodies is for prostitution to be legalized. Legalization will open it up to regulation; and regulation means safety.

JEANNETTE ANGELL, Callgirl

Prostitution, when unmotivated by economic need, might well be defined as a species of psychological addiction, built on self-hatred through repetitions of the act of sale by which a whore is defined.

KATE MILLETT, Sexual Politics

When prostitution is a crime, the message conveyed is that women who are sexual are “bad,” and therefore legitimate victims of sexual assault. Sex becomes a weapon to be used by men.

MARGO ST. JAMES, San Francisco Examiner, Apr. 29, 1979

I had never been with a woman for longer than a night, and they had always been whores. And while throughout each of these speedy encounters I tried to maintain a friendliness with the women, I knew in my heart it was false, and afterward always felt remote and caved in. I had in the last year or so given up whores entirely, thinking it best to go without rather than pantomime human closeness.

PATRICK DEWITT, The Sisters Brothers

Prostitution requires for its diminution not only laws, well enforced, to abolish the traffic in womanhood; not only better social protection against harpies who seduce young girls seeking an honest livelihood; not only better chaperonage of young girls in exposed occupations; not only better opportunities for natural enjoyment of youthful pleasure under morally safe conditions; not only these—but most of all, greater power on the part of the average young girl to earn her own support under right conditions and for a living wage.

ANNA GARLIN SPENCER, Woman's Share in Social Culture

(in reply to TNDommeK)
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RE: money issues - 6/5/2012 1:27:13 PM   
fetisheden


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that is quite impressive but really has nothing to do with the original post. being a prodomme IS sex work but definitely not prostitution(when done by an actual domina instead of an escort with a whip)

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RE: money issues - 6/5/2012 3:11:49 PM   
kalikshama


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You are correct that I was not replying to the OP. I was responding to posts 6 and 9.

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RE: money issues - 6/5/2012 4:14:45 PM   
TNDommeK


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In response to the OP, it only makes them your boss, if you allow it. I am given money on a regular basis, and no one is My boss. It's all about how you run things, how you choose to allow your subs to act.

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The working Fin Domme
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Our snark-nado needs more cowbell


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RE: money issues - 6/5/2012 5:27:31 PM   
DesFIP


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From: Apple County NY
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Kalikshama, that's an impressive list of quotes. All of which ignore the reality of the situation. The overwhelming majority of prostitutes, male and female, were sexually abused from an early age onward and taught their only value was in the use of their bodies by someone else without their consent.

If you're being raped nightly by the one male who ought to protect you, you might as well be paid for that nightly rape and deny it to your long term abuser. And that's the reality of teen aged runaways who turn to prostitution.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


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RE: money issues - 6/6/2012 6:03:17 AM   
kalikshama


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I see the problem - I left out the post about housewives/prostitutes - that's why y'all aren't seeing the connection I made, which was no, that was not an original thought.

ps - I'm not taking a stand on any of those quotes - it's interesting to me to read different views on women/wives/prostitutes from different countries and different eras.

(in reply to DesFIP)
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RE: money issues - 6/6/2012 6:15:04 AM   
Hillwilliam


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quote:

ORIGINAL: fetisheden

that is quite impressive but really has nothing to do with the original post. being a prodomme IS sex work but definitely not prostitution(when done by an actual domina instead of an escort with a whip)

OK, what's the difference between a "Pro Domme" with a whip where there is no sexual contact and an escort with the same whip doing the same thing?

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RE: money issues - 6/6/2012 6:55:43 AM   
crazyml


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quote:

ORIGINAL: GoreanLadycat
I want devotion, not denominations.....


<tips hat> I see what ya did there.

I love a good pun.

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RE: money issues - 6/6/2012 7:38:47 AM   
LadyHibiscus


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Hillwilliam


quote:

ORIGINAL: fetisheden

that is quite impressive but really has nothing to do with the original post. being a prodomme IS sex work but definitely not prostitution(when done by an actual domina instead of an escort with a whip)

OK, what's the difference between a "Pro Domme" with a whip where there is no sexual contact and an escort with the same whip doing the same thing?


Speaking as a former pro dom... first, skill. Not that every pro dom has skills but the successful ones actually learned their stuff in real life, not from watching a porn clip. Second, escorts fuck and suck, don't they? And we didn't.

Overall, if you can stand the strangers-touching-you thing (SHUDDER) you can make much better money as a fetish escort. Bless their hearts.

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