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WestBaySlave -> RE: Begging & Ownership (5/24/2012 5:33:29 PM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: LadyPact
quote:
ORIGINAL: WestBaySlave
I ask stuff in an earnest way all the time. I honestly can't remember that ever being begging.
This is going to sound ridiculous, but by any chance, did you happen to look up the definition of the word? I know, I know...... It's a three letter word (beg) and everyone knows what it means, but did you notice that Webster's gives that very definition? To ask in earnest.
Not ridiculous at all! Getting at the root of meaning is a big part of the debates around here. We're often using different definitions as well as different intent.
Going to Miriam Webster:
http://oaadonline.oxfordlearnersdictionaries.com/dictionary/beg
quote:
1
: to ask for as a charity
2
a : to ask earnestly for : entreat b : to require as necessary or appropriate
For the most part, I see begging as one. While two is also accurate, there is something of the emotional tone of it that makes in inappropriate as a description for the times I ask earnestly.
Compare:
"I asked my manager when we'd be getting paid, and when he said Wednesday, I asked for a Saturday appointment with my hairdresser, and that night, asked for my favorite sashimi plate at Jo's Sushi."
Versus:
"I begged my manager as to when to we'd be getting paid, and when he said Wednesday, I begged for a Saturday appointment with my hairdresser, and that night, begged for my favorite sashimi plate at Jo's Sushi."
And no, I'm not saying that those who beg would say or use it this way, but as an example of how begging implies a certain urgency and desperation of tone beyond just sincerity. Or, as the Oxford American Dictionary defines it:
http://oaadonline.oxfordlearnersdictionaries.com/dictionary/beg
quote:
1. [intransitive, transitive] to ask someone for something, especially in an anxious way because you want or need it very much.
2 [intransitive, transitive] to ask someone for money, food, etc., especially in the street.
Though, their third definition is something I may well engage in. [;)]
quote:
3 [intransitive] if a dog begs, it sits on its back legs with its front legs in the air, waiting to be given something.
There is something of a Catch 22 when it comes to me and begging ( outside of play scenarios ). Unless something is really dire, I'm likely to submit to most things a partner desires and would rarely push for something unless it's urgent. If I bring up something that is truly urgent, e.g. "Honey, I need to go to the hospital." Well, I really wouldn't be with a good match for someone who I'd have to beg for something fundamental like that.
So, it's not that I won't beg in any scenario, it's that my threshold for having to beg is so extremely high, that if crossed, it signals at best a red flag, and at worst, something rather serious ailing the relationship.
As for serious commitments, like ownership, marriage, or having kids, these are not things I would beg for - I would discuss, and in in an ownership situation, my owner would have the final say.
quote:
ORIGINAL: Marini
quote:
ORIGINAL: LadyPact
quote:
ORIGINAL: WestBaySlave
I ask stuff in an earnest way all the time. I honestly can't remember that ever being begging.
This is going to sound ridiculous, but by any chance, did you happen to look up the definition of the word? I know, I know...... It's a three letter word (beg) and everyone knows what it means, but did you notice that Webster's gives that very definition? To ask in earnest.
LadyPact, I enjoy listening to a variety of opinions, but I have been on these boards long enough to know, that many people that post here are a long, long, long way of being accepting of different "ideas", "choices" and "kinks".
You asked why many of us prefer to post in politics and religion, this thread is an example of why I primarily stay, and ESPECIALLY post down there.
[sm=hippie.gif]
All I can is as usual, to each their own!
Peace out
I don't really see how many more disclaimers I can put in my post to indicate that I'm fully accepting of others ideas, choices, and kinks. If you go back through the thread I don't see where you'd find one whiff of disapproval of how others manage their lives.
Accepting your kink does not mean it has to be my kink or apply in my relationships. Nor do I expect vice versa.
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