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Researching Cheating Online !! - 6/6/2006 3:25:30 PM   
dave1212


Posts: 158
Joined: 1/2/2006
From: Lancashire UK
Status: offline
Greeting's,
i would like to throw an intreresting though of mine into the "crowd" so to speak for Your opinion's and thought's....to both Dominant's and sub/slaves.....
i quite recently have had the humble pleasure of becoming an O/L slave to my beautiful Owner Haya Sierra of Ka' Azdor ....and as a part of my research and study's i would like if i may to ask Your thought's on this........The main reason for this particular post is that during one of Our discussion's the topic of "cheating" online was raised, as were the particular punishment's available..and given..
The amount of control my Owner uses to train and guide me by various method's is such that "cheating" in any way is virtually impossible ....and i was wondering how it is with other's here ?
The particular Dynamic's are not relevant but of course You may mention this if You so wish...so to make it easier for You to list Your answer's i will write it in a sort of questionarre form....
(1) What were the main reason's why You decided to choose the O/L way to serve...?
(2) Did You choose/find Your Owner or did they choose/find You....?
(3) What step's if any did Your Owner/ You take to ensure compatibility...?
(4) How difficult was it/has it been for You with regard's to Dicipline/Training if any ......?
(5) How is communication used to control You ie: online/via web cam/ phone etc...?
(6) Have You as a Dominant ever caught any in Your service "cheating" and if so how did You deal with such an occurence..?
(7) Have any of the sub/slaves in or out of sevice ever thought of how they could get away with "cheating" ?......"this is of course theoretical"
(8) Is there a greater reward waiting for You further down the road ie: relocation and such...?
The answer's given are purely to help me with my research and study's and of course to help my Owner also research the "completeness" of her method's of training..........
Please feel free to leave any question's un-answered as i do not wish to get anyone into any trouble...

i would like to thank You for taking the trouble to read and answer if You are allowed to do so and of course thank You to my Owner Haya Sierra for allowing me to post.............
abdo dave




_____________________________

~Discomfort, endlessly has pulled itself upon me~
~Distracting/reacting~
~Against my will i stand beside my own reflection~
~It's haunting how i can't seem to find myself again..
"Linkin Park"
TSR-560-087-333
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Researching Cheating Online !! - 6/6/2006 3:28:52 PM   
juliaoceania


Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline 		Ok.. this is about serving someone online without any interaction real world and not cheating on a spouse?

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to dave1212)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Researching Cheating Online !! - 6/6/2006 3:31:24 PM   
irishbynature


Posts: 551
Joined: 5/11/2006
Status: offline 		Me thinks so, Julia!

_____________________________


What seems nasty, painful, or evil, can become a source of beauty, joy, and strength, for those who have the vision to recognize it as such. Henry Miller


(in reply to juliaoceania)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Researching Cheating Online !! - 6/6/2006 3:45:05 PM   
LaTigresse


Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline 		online relationships other than friendship do not make any sense to me anyway.........

(in reply to irishbynature)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Researching Cheating Online !! - 6/6/2006 3:47:30 PM   
Tikkiee


Posts: 1099
Joined: 4/6/2006
Status: offline
quote:

The amount of control my Owner uses to train and guide me by various method's is such that "cheating" in any way is virtually impossible ....

I am sorry but I am having an extremely hard time understanding this?

_____________________________

~~@ cass @~~

(in reply to dave1212)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Researching Cheating Online !! - 6/6/2006 3:49:42 PM   
irishbynature


Posts: 551
Joined: 5/11/2006
Status: offline 		I think the OP is asking if having a relationship on line (BDSM) is cheating...and if they did...did the relationship go further into the 3-D (reallife) experience.....just trying to interpret...???

_____________________________


What seems nasty, painful, or evil, can become a source of beauty, joy, and strength, for those who have the vision to recognize it as such. Henry Miller


(in reply to Tikkiee)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Researching Cheating Online !! - 6/6/2006 4:43:17 PM   
juliaoceania


Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: dave1212


Greeting's,
i would like to throw an intreresting though of mine into the "crowd" so to speak for Your opinion's and thought's....to both Dominant's and sub/slaves.....
i quite recently have had the humble pleasure of becoming an O/L slave to my beautiful Owner Haya Sierra of Ka' Azdor ....and as a part of my research and study's i would like if i may to ask Your thought's on this........The main reason for this particular post is that during one of Our discussion's the topic of "cheating" online was raised, as were the particular punishment's available..and given..
The amount of control my Owner uses to train and guide me by various method's is such that "cheating" in any way is virtually impossible ....and i was wondering how it is with other's here ?
The particular Dynamic's are not relevant but of course You may mention this if You so wish...so to make it easier for You to list Your answer's i will write it in a sort of questionarre form....
(1) What were the main reason's why You decided to choose the O/L way to serve...?
 
I havent decided to serve online and will probably never do so. It just doesnt compare to the real thing

(2) Did You choose/find Your Owner or did they choose/find You....?

I am not owned
(3) What step's if any did Your Owner/ You take to ensure compatibility...?

Communication is the way to ensure compatibility
(4) How difficult was it/has it been for You with regard's to Dicipline/Training if any ......?

I havent had this sort ofd training
(5) How is communication used to control You ie: online/via web cam/ phone etc...?

Um, in real life we scene but he hasnt taken control of my life .. not yet anyways
(6) Have You as a Dominant ever caught any in Your service "cheating" and if so how did You deal with such an occurence..?

Im a submissive
(7) Have any of the sub/slaves in or out of sevice ever thought of how they could get away with "cheating" ?......"this is of course theoretical"

I do not cheat with anything at any time. Cheating is cheating one's self as far as I am concerned.
(8) Is there a greater reward waiting for You further down the road ie: relocation and such...?

Life is full of rewards, I do not understand the question
The answer's given are purely to help me with my research and study's and of course to help my Owner also research the "completeness" of her method's of training..........
Please feel free to leave any question's un-answered as i do not wish to get anyone into any trouble...

i would like to thank You for taking the trouble to read and answer if You are allowed to do so and of course thank You to my Owner Haya Sierra for allowing me to post.............
abdo dave





Ok... I am all for research, but I doubt this was helpful to you...

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to dave1212)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Researching Cheating Online !! - 6/6/2006 4:56:05 PM   
OedipusRexIt


Posts: 634
Joined: 11/15/2005
Status: offline 		Sorry, Dave, but it looks like you're getting a near-universal "huh" from this post.

I know many people consider an online "relationhip" a real thing, but many also do not.  Looks like most of us in the latter group replied.

I suppose (which is all I can do) that one maintains whatever fidelity either through self-discipline, total devotion to one's partner, or both.

Otherwise, what on earth could stop you ?

_____________________________

"My name is Inigo Montoya, you killed my father, prepare to die..."

(in reply to juliaoceania)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Researching Cheating Online !! - 6/6/2006 5:35:24 PM   
keme


Posts: 163
Joined: 4/26/2006
Status: offline 		dave I will just say IF to you your online relationship is real then any cheating on it is therefore real. I know personally for me to cheat either online or in real life is disgusting... but then again I have chosen to be abstinant for years and get so much criticism over that I almost hate telling anyone... BUT on the other hand I can look into the mirror and like who I see.

_____________________________

The path I choose is not for everyone... it is mine alone... and my responsibility to reach the end of it making as much positive influence as I am capable of and being as true to myself as I can be.
~keme

(in reply to dave1212)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Researching Cheating Online !! - 6/6/2006 5:59:09 PM   
zumala


Posts: 1121
Joined: 6/16/2005
Status: offline 		Well... my answer may be a little convelouted.  My experience with online relationships was not related to BDSM.  It was more of a dating long-distance type of thing.  And neither long-distance (Texas to Canada) worked.  First guy was nuts, second one wasn't what I thought he was, but it took me a couple years to realize that.  He did cheat on me online.  So I understand that on-line relationships can be real to those involved.  At the same time, now that I'm married to the third guy I met on-line (we lived 6 hours apart), I know that on-line pales in comparison to a real face-to-face relationship.
 
On-line, you can't control what others do.  You may not even KNOW what they do.  You have to trust, sometimes even when you're nervous that something isn't right, just because you don't have PROOF.  I wouldn't do it now.  Friendship online, deeper relationship's gonna have to move to real life.  At least as far as I'm concerned.
 
zuma

(in reply to keme)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Researching Cheating Online !! - 6/6/2006 6:51:09 PM   
proudsub


Posts: 6142
Joined: 1/31/2004
From: Washington
Status: offline 		I can't tell if you are talking about married people cheating by having an online relationship or if it is about cheating on an online dom or sub by having more than one online relationship.

_____________________________

proudsub

"Without goals you become what you were. With goals you become what you wish." .

"You are entitled to your own opinions but not your own facts"--Alan Greenspan


(in reply to dave1212)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Researching Cheating Online !! - 6/6/2006 7:24:53 PM   
HayaSierra


Posts: 119
Joined: 4/7/2005
From: In Georgia
Status: offline 		Quick clarification because he actually discussed this with me prior to posting:

dave is speaking about people who are in online Master/slave or Dom(me)/sub relationships and their feelings about "cheating" in regards to instructions, rules and orders given by the Dominant.  In other words -- saying you did something that you didn't do. Also some of the questions he asked deal with how people got into the relationship of Master/slave or Owner/slave to begin with, and specifics of how this applies to individuals here.

I hope this helped clarify it a bit....



_____________________________

Haya Sierra
Haya Of Ka Azdor Estate --
http://groups.msn.com/Domsub/
Basic Information about the Hanian System of D/s

(in reply to proudsub)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Researching Cheating Online !! - 6/6/2006 7:40:00 PM   
proudsub


Posts: 6142
Joined: 1/31/2004
From: Washington
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: HayaSierra

Quick clarification because he actually discussed this with me prior to posting:

dave is speaking about people who are in online Master/slave or Dom(me)/sub relationships and their feelings about "cheating" in regards to instructions, rules and orders given by the Dominant.  In other words -- saying you did something that you didn't do. Also some of the questions he asked deal with how people got into the relationship of Master/slave or Owner/slave to begin with, and specifics of how this applies to individuals here.

I hope this helped clarify it a bit....




Thank you for the clarification. I wouldn't see much point in an online D/s relationship if the sub didn't do as asked without telling the dom.

I met my first online dom at a game site. We were playing a game in a private room and had had some sexual discussions in the past. On that day that changed my life he asked if i liked being dominated. I had no idea what he really meant but i said sure i like the guy to take charge. That led to 2 yrs of him dominating me online and teaching me what this lifestyle was all about.

_____________________________

proudsub

"Without goals you become what you were. With goals you become what you wish." .

"You are entitled to your own opinions but not your own facts"--Alan Greenspan


(in reply to HayaSierra)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Researching Cheating Online !! - 6/6/2006 9:45:51 PM   
objectivist


Posts: 13
Joined: 8/26/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: dave1212


i quite recently have had the humble pleasure of becoming an O/L slave to my beautiful Owner Haya Sierra of Ka' Azdor .



The very idea of "online slavery" is a mock.  For all you might think you know, you know only what a person cares to show you, when you are online.  They are a "Charlie Brown Christmas Tree."   A mostly bare frame, on which you hang all your tinsel, bright lights, and glittering crystal orniments, to obscure the fact what you see, is mostly of your own creation.

(in reply to dave1212)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Researching Cheating Online !! - 6/6/2006 10:05:52 PM   
EvilGeoff


Posts: 523
Joined: 8/24/2005
Status: offline 		Just a couple of quick observations:

1.  I'm a owner, the questions, as posed, were asking for answers from the slaves and submissives point of view.  So no input from me there.

2. _IF_ you are going to use the online rule about capitalizing pronouns, the capitalized Y in You and Your is addressing Dominants/Masters/Mistresses/Owners.  The y in you and your should be lower case when addressing submissives or slaves.  My personal preference is to use proper grammar and spelling and capitalization rules, but if you're going to use the online rules, please use them correctly.  It would be the end of online civilization if we were to start capitalizing pronouns (and other words) willy nilly.

YIK,
- Geoff

(in reply to dave1212)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Researching Cheating Online !! - 6/9/2006 11:47:59 AM   
dave1212


Posts: 158
Joined: 1/2/2006
From: Lancashire UK
Status: offline 		i would just like to thank everyone who took the time and trouble to either read or answer my post..

although i may not have made myself quite clear and needed a little help with some clarification from Haya Sierra it was not my intention to confuse anyone or to ruffle any feather's..

but a Sincere Thankyou anyway...
            abdo dave

< Message edited by dave1212 -- 6/9/2006 11:49:15 AM >

_____________________________

~Discomfort, endlessly has pulled itself upon me~
~Distracting/reacting~
~Against my will i stand beside my own reflection~
~It's haunting how i can't seem to find myself again..
"Linkin Park"
TSR-560-087-333

(in reply to EvilGeoff)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Researching Cheating Online !! - 6/9/2006 12:05:59 PM   
darkinshadows


Posts: 4145
Joined: 6/2/2004
From: UK
Status: offline
quote:

to both Dominant's and sub/slaves.....

 
Do you want to here from switches too?  And what about Tops?  Bottoms?  .....


_____________________________
.dark.



...i surrender to gravity and the unknown...

(in reply to dave1212)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Researching Cheating Online !! - 6/9/2006 12:06:16 PM   
marked


Posts: 12
Joined: 9/27/2005
Status: offline 		one. i did not choose it ,it just happened.
Master was married and i was living with a 250 lbvanilla gorilla
on-line fit out needs then
two.Master found me
three.i think Master made sure i was an honest woman
four.its been REAL let me tell ya..
five.always the written word
seven.never, i would be the one loseing if i cheated and did not do things exactly as told to
eight.yes a real life meet and a life long friend at the very least..
with on-line you get out exactly what you put in period
i would not change the last 11 months for anything

(in reply to dave1212)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Researching Cheating Online !! - 6/9/2006 12:16:35 PM   
RiotGirl


Posts: 3149
Status: offline
quote:

The very idea of "online slavery" is a mock


not to be soley directed at you.. but directed at everyone who replied like you

the boy didnt ask that question. 

so shut up.  If you dont have an answer.. get over it.. you dont have an answer.  Or alteast reply with something friendly. 

(in reply to objectivist)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Researching Cheating Online !! - 6/9/2006 2:27:13 PM   
pinkee


Posts: 487
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: dave1212


Greeting's,
i would like to throw an intreresting though of mine into the "crowd" so to speak for Your opinion's and thought's....to both Dominant's and sub/slaves.....
i quite recently have had the humble pleasure of becoming an O/L slave to my beautiful Owner Haya Sierra of Ka' Azdor ....and as a part of my research and study's i would like if i may to ask Your thought's on this........The main reason for this particular post is that during one of Our discussion's the topic of "cheating" online was raised, as were the particular punishment's available..and given..
The amount of control my Owner uses to train and guide me by various method's is such that "cheating" in any way is virtually impossible ....and i was wondering how it is with other's here ?
The particular Dynamic's are not relevant but of course You may mention this if You so wish...so to make it easier for You to list Your answer's i will write it in a sort of questionarre form....
(1) What were the main reason's why You decided to choose the O/L way to serve...?
(2) Did You choose/find Your Owner or did they choose/find You....?
(3) What step's if any did Your Owner/ You take to ensure compatibility...?
(4) How difficult was it/has it been for You with regard's to Dicipline/Training if any ......?
(5) How is communication used to control You ie: online/via web cam/ phone etc...?
(6) Have You as a Dominant ever caught any in Your service "cheating" and if so how did You deal with such an occurence..?
(7) Have any of the sub/slaves in or out of sevice ever thought of how they could get away with "cheating" ?......"this is of course theoretical"
(8) Is there a greater reward waiting for You further down the road ie: relocation and such...?
The answer's given are purely to help me with my research and study's and of course to help my Owner also research the "completeness" of her method's of training..........
Please feel free to leave any question's un-answered as i do not wish to get anyone into any trouble...

i would like to thank You for taking the trouble to read and answer if You are allowed to do so and of course thank You to my Owner Haya Sierra for allowing me to post.............
abdo dave





Took an online collar once...for  two weeks.  Lost a good friend, caused U/us both misery.  Lesson learnt.
 
pinkee

(in reply to dave1212)
Profile   Post #: 20
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