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CynthiaWVirginia -> RE: Questions and advice (6/12/2012 11:40:43 AM)
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Stephanie72, I only read your original post and not the rest of the thread. Am a night owl and just woke up, my eyes are still fuzzy, and I only came here to check my mail but saw this thread in the scroll.
I. Would. NEVER. Force. MY. slave. To ruin his reputation and destabilize him financially. Especially not to prove the depth of his submission to me. Dominance implies taking responsibility, not just enjoying all the fun kinky stuff.
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What i want to know is this. Am i obligated to obey his orders if i am uncomfortable with them even though i knew about this from the beginning and have repeatedly promised to obey every order whether i like it or not?
This is not a matter of submission, but one of survival. Is he prepared to take financial responsibility for you if you are fired and cannot find another job? Is he prepared to pony up with the cash you lose upon retirement as well as any other benefits you may lose by obeying his orders? When you agreed to obey, you thought you could trust him not to make you get fired from your job while following his orders...or else this would have sent up major red flags early on. I hate to say this but his demand sounds either stupid or crazy. I am not saying the word crazy lightly...several people I love require meds to live a normal life and sometimes the meds need adjusting or they go completely off the wall. IMHO, your Dom has issues if he is demanding this from you.
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Am i the one in control and taking control away from him?
If I pressured my slave to do something like that, I would expect him to turn to my mother or sister to have my sanity checked out by a professional. I would consider this as part of the service I demand from him. I do not need psych meds, but if I did, my slave had better have the balls to "defy" me and take control if they stopped working and I thought I was a Prophet or something. Last October when I had dozens of blood clots hit my lungs, my boy took over everything for me. Even when he was bathing me in my hospital bed and leaving me to go to my ATM to take my money out to pay my bills...he was serving me. Every Dom can fall on their arse at one time or another and might need their submissive to "take control", even "away from him/us". This does not make the submissive any LESS.
You are having to defend yourself from serious financial harm. IMHO, you should not be forced into this position.
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Is the saying that "without obedience there is no submission"really true?
...and if you had a kid and your Dominant required you to drown it, you wouldn't be a true submissive unless you obeyed? [:D] Without good leadership, there is no Dominance, that's my answer to that quote.
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Do you think i should give in and obey his orders about having sex with other men during work hours even if i am uncomfortable with it?
IMHO, after six years together...I cannot imagine your having to prove your submission to him by risking your job and your reputation. I would also be very uncomfortable with his expecting you to have unsafe sex with men of his choice, even if you like it and find it hawt. (I have a nephew who is dying from AIDS, so...be careful.)
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