BitaTruble
Posts: 9779
Joined: 1/12/2006 From: Texas Status: offline
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Melanie38 I'd love to hear of real life experiences of being a 24/365/slaves existing this life or have done.Do'es and don'ts positive and negative feed backs my experience of part time subs life is it was hard work but interesting,if there are potential owners or previous owners i'd like to hear from you too,thank you slave melanie. Himself and I have undergone an evolution (and sometimes a downright revolution) during our years together. There is more 'us' and 'we' now whereas in the past there was a lot of "I" and "me" involved. "I" and "me" are still important and sometimes necessary for one reason or the other but these days they are the exceptions rather than the rule. Like any relationship, there have been ups and downs, some of which were due to circumstances beyond our control and others which we brought upon ourselves. We are very stubborn about our success though so neither of us bail at the first sign of truble. We work things out because 'we' are more important to each other than any one 'thing' that may seek to damage what has taken us a long time to build. We started off D/s, so in addition to the regular stuff that folks who are hooking up go through, that added an additional layer to our core that has been tweaked and refined over these years. Neither of us are willing to suffer the consequences of 'not' being together so we do what's necessary to make sure that such doesn't happen. That's been working pretty well for.. going on close to 17 years now. The foundation has been pretty solid and hasn't cracked so there isn't any super glue holding stuff in place and we don't have to worry about leakage (well, I worry somewhat about leakage, but that's what Depends are for!) The relationship we have built has taken time.. plenty of it and I'm sure as we continue to involve the soup is going to continue to change flavors on occasion. (I'm in the mood for Lobster Bisque.. that's going to color my response!) Some 'do' and 'do not do' stuff that is important to our M/s dynamic (as opposed to stuff that is built into any adult relationship) I follow the path he sets for us. It's attractive to me and with my input and feedback and the fact that I occasionally see bumps in the road that he hasn't taken notice of gives a better chance of progressing. We are a work in progress so when one or the other trips over a missed hazard, the other takes up the slack, reaches out a hand and readjusts the support beams to keep the M/s dynamic (important to both of us) in tact. We have reached a point where we rarely stumble in this area but mishaps are a part of life and while we might not welcome whatever caused us to stumble, we are more likely to look upon such things as an opportunity rather than a detriment. He leads - sometimes we end up in pretty screwy places but for the most part they have just added some dimensions that might otherwise have been missed but almost always have contributed to the 'greater' good of 'us' and the dynamic we share. I obey. He has the final authority in all matters. When push comes to shove, even if I don't like it, even if I believe it is detrimental, I obey. That doesn't mean I don't grumble or grouse on the rare occasion.. but I do it anyway. He gives reasonable commands which are thoughtful and purposeful on most occasions. When they are not.. I still obey. He doesn't ask of me things which he knows I am not capable of accomplishing. He is realistic in his expectations but does expect excellence and sincere effort. He doesn't beat me up when I fail to meet a given expectation and will give me the tools and tips I need to try again and a second attempt often brings success. He doesn't quit on me, on our dynamic or our relationship. He stretches us, pushes me and himself and whatever envelopes happen to be lieing around the place in a given momenet and allows me (in fact requires me) to be very open and honest with my creative ideas for play/scene time. When he takes one of my ideas and runs with it, it almost always leads to happy, sweaty, bloody torment which is a HUGE plus for us. SM is important to both of us so being creative in that area keeps things fresh and hopping (and I am nothing if not highly imaginative and very creative when it comes to this sort of stuff! I'm a perk, he acknowledges that and appreciates it and I appreciate his appreciation!) He doesn't have a gag reflex or a cringe factor so, for us, the sky is damn near limitless in this area. I could write so much more but have dinner to prep and want others to contribute their ideas.. (which I look forward to reading!) and may come back later with some additional thoughts. tfn
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"Oh, so it's just like Rock, paper, scissors." He laughed. "You are the wisest woman I know."
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