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Kids with delusions - 7/9/2012 3:15:47 AM

allyjax

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Does a girl of 18 really know if she is a sub ? I wonder. Any difference to an 18 year old boy declaring himself a Dom ? The mind boggles.

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RE: Kids with delusions - 7/9/2012 3:18:49 AM

ClassIsInSession

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How old were you when you started out? I experimented sexually long before I was 18, but didn't really plunge into the D/S lifestyle until I was about 23. Granted, there was nowhere near the online resources at that time. So, I'd say it's possible. Certainly age doesn't always equal maturity.

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RE: Kids with delusions - 7/9/2012 3:19:10 AM

GreedyTop

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um... hi? welcome to the discussion side of CM?

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RE: Kids with delusions - 7/9/2012 3:41:47 AM

kalikshama

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I certainly knew as a teenager that I liked rough sex and bondage, but due to the lack of internet at the time, didn't learn the concept of submission until much later.

What I do think is delusional is declaring oneself a Master at 18, because to me that is not a sexual orientation, it's having acquired a skill. We've discussed this at length here: http://www.collarchat.com/m_4159809/mpage_1/tm.htm

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RE: Kids with delusions - 7/9/2012 3:42:39 AM

DehumanizesYou

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Welcome to the site. Honestly its best to experiment in real time, in order to figure what you want, find out what you like and dislike, what type of relationship works out. Someone may think they want something. How do they know though without experience? Sure they may think they do, but experiences will give them answers and as they get older the experiences may change them in what they want, such as desiring to switch or go from a different role than they started out as. I know I did.

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RE: Kids with delusions - 7/9/2012 7:01:02 AM

OohAahMrs

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Welcome al, can't help you with the boys and girls............well the boys that is!

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RE: Kids with delusions - 7/9/2012 7:21:05 AM

ashjor911

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Welcome

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RE: Kids with delusions - 7/9/2012 9:51:02 AM

Killerangel

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Doesn't really matter if they know these things according to your definition, they think they know according to theirs and that's all it takes to hang out your shingle. They have to start somewhere, or everyone would be starting as they were older and still have the same learning curve to get through.

Welcome to CM.

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RE: Kids with delusions - 7/9/2012 10:02:26 AM

BurntKitty

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Welcome to CM, Al.

I was interested in s & m somewhere around HS age. I "experimented" with d/s a few years back. I'm not into the d/s dynamic at all. I'm still all about the pain aspect. I enjoy being a sadomasochist with noting to do with dominance or submission.

In answer to your query - Yes, an 18 year old knows her/his sexuality.

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RE: Kids with delusions - 7/9/2012 10:17:56 AM

stef

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quote:

ORIGINAL: allyjax

Does a girl of 18 really know if she is a sub ? I wonder. Any difference to an 18 year old boy declaring himself a Dom ? The mind boggles.

Your mind boggles easily. I knew how I was bent long before I was 18. Hasn't much changed since either.

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RE: Kids with delusions - 7/9/2012 10:20:14 AM

sexyred1

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quote:

ORIGINAL: allyjax

Does a girl of 18 really know if she is a sub ? I wonder. Any difference to an 18 year old boy declaring himself a Dom ? The mind boggles.

Some people don't know what they are till much older and some know as kids. Why does your mind boggle at the thought that someone is aware of their wiring?

I knew what I was into during puberty. Was I delusional? No.

You look old enough to stop with the sweeping generalizations.

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RE: Kids with delusions - 7/9/2012 10:20:48 AM

ChatteParfaitt

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quote:

ORIGINAL: allyjax

Does a girl of 18 really know if she is a sub ? I wonder. Any difference to an 18 year old boy declaring himself a Dom ? The mind boggles.

Depends on the kid, now doesn't it?

When I was 15 and first starting to experiment with my sexuality, I had a dominant male as my primary partner, and subs males (that he was aware of) as my secondary partners.

The dom partner (he didn't *know* he was a dominant, but sexually, he was, please trust me on this) knew I had sex with other men, but saw those men in a very different light.

Not much in my life has changed since then, except I am no longer 15 so I don't fuck around. I am monogamous with my primary partner (male dom) and have males subs I have power exchange relationships with but no sex.

Big surprise, I have considered myself a switch for about 33 years now (and have known what that definition means to ME). Obviously, I have always been a switch. It really is just who I am.

So yeah, I can see an 18 year old knowing they are sub or dom or switch or maso or a sadist or, you know, take your pic.

Do I think it's a great idea for someone that young to be very open to experimenting and exploring and discovering who and what they are with minimal preconceived notions?

Sure.

An 18 year old that knows what they want or need sexually is not delusional to me. YOU are delusional for not understanding how very grown up kids are these days about their sexuality.

Just my take, no offense meant (okay, some meant, but not that much).

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RE: Kids with delusions - 7/9/2012 10:21:13 AM

LanaDeVille

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*eyeroll*

That's about all I have to say.

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RE: Kids with delusions - 7/9/2012 11:08:58 AM

TNDommeK

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Everything LP said about kids being grown up these days..also, I think they have way more resources now to seek out info and learn what they want to know.

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RE: Kids with delusions - 7/9/2012 11:12:22 AM

Delilya

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welcome to CM

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Old men with delusions. - 7/9/2012 11:17:55 AM

LaTigresse

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quote:

ORIGINAL: allyjax

Does a girl of 18 really know if she is a sub ? I wonder. Any difference to an 18 year old boy declaring himself a Dom ? The mind boggles.

It boggles my mind less than 55 yo men thinking they have a chance with an 18yo girl. Enough so to be cruising their profiles, knowing they are on the site.

Welcome.

< Message edited by LaTigresse -- 7/9/2012 11:19:00 AM >

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RE: Old men with delusions. - 7/9/2012 11:25:07 AM

LanaDeVille

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quote:

ORIGINAL: LaTigresse

quote:

ORIGINAL: allyjax

Does a girl of 18 really know if she is a sub ? I wonder. Any difference to an 18 year old boy declaring himself a Dom ? The mind boggles.

It boggles my mind less than 55 yo men thinking they have a chance with an 18yo girl. Enough so to be cruising their profiles, knowing they are on the site.

Welcome.

The mail I get from some of the 50 and up crowd is really disgusting.
And when I politely decline, they curse at me and call me a "teeny bopper" or some other age-related insult.

My mind really doesn't get boggled anymore.
It's boggled the hell out. =P

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RE: Kids with delusions - 7/9/2012 4:01:26 PM

ARIES83

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quote:

ORIGINAL: allyjax

Does a girl of 18 really know if she is a sub ? I wonder. Any difference to an 18 year old boy declaring himself a Dom ? The mind boggles.

Don't take this personally because i've said it before,
A lot of people on here look down on the younger
posters, quoting lack of experience as the reason,
Maybe a lot of you are getting to old to remember but
18 is in many cases, more than old enough to know
who you are and what you want, yes theres almost
certainly a low amount of experience, and im sure
almost all of us went through an evolution of who we
were between the age of 18 and the present day.

I can honestly say I've been traveling in this direction
since atleast puberty... was a Dom at 13-16? Hell no!
But I was on a kinky path and this is where it's lead so
far.
I think many of you may underestimate just how kinky
your kids get in the bedroom haha.

I would say for me, I truly began to come into my Dominant
self at probably... 20-25 but I've ALWAYS been kinky.
And I consider myself a late bloomer!

-ARIES

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RE: Kids with delusions - 7/9/2012 4:37:15 PM

DarkSteven

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I'm 56 and I think I'm a Dom. If anyone thinks different, I don't care.

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RE: Kids with delusions - 7/9/2012 4:54:21 PM

sirsilas

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I was in no doubt as a teen that I was into bdsm and was pretty sure i was dom. Now 40 odd years on all thats really changed is Im sure Im dom and have a lot more experience. I dont think you need to be a certain age to know what you are, some are very sure very early while others will never know. Interestingly one of the most mature things i have read eecently about being the dominant was written by a 20 year old.

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