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RE: Newbies' Guide to BDSM Parties. - 7/10/2012 12:04:41 PM

PeonForHer

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quote:

ORIGINAL: dublinemma

. . . And the venues often have 'greeters' - people who'll meet newbies at the door and show them around once inside. Again, phone the venue in advance and ask.

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RE: Newbies' Guide to BDSM Parties. - 7/10/2012 1:28:52 PM

dublinemma

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Joined: 9/10/2010
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quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

At the ones in England, Emma, the 'strict dress code' is only 'strict' insofar as you have to look as though you've made some kind of effort. I spent a good couple of years before my first ever BDSM gig labouring under the misapprehension that people had to wear some kind of dominant or submissive 'uniform'. If I were you, I'd just pick out the venue you like the look of, and phone them up to ask if your intended costume is going to be OK. My guess is that they're very unlikely to say 'No'.

The stinger is they won't let you wear any kind of denim, i live in jeans!! Even black jeans, madness!!

I know once I got there I'd probably be fine and that at least one person would talk to me it's just working up the balls to do that, ha!

Thanks for the advice!

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RE: Newbies' Guide to BDSM Parties. - 7/10/2012 2:29:02 PM

everhope

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great find Dark Steven. great advice.

once upon a time at the Dominant that i was serving order, i went to a munch by myself. petrified does not even begin to describe how i felt. i walked down this long hallway to find the room where the munch was held, turned this slight corner and there were 40 to 50 people looking at me. talk about a deer in headlights! no one came up to say hello...just stares..maybe a few smiles. i saw a door on the other side of the room to an outside area.. i saw my escape. i told myself, if i don't see anyone i know i am going to walk straight out the door to my car.
nobody said hello and i didn't recognize anyone so hands shaking and about to puke...i stepped outside and heard prttyblossom (old screen name) hello and 3 people stood up to give me hugs.....i was good to go after that.

after this experience, i have made it a point to notice people alone and looking nervous, greeting them and taking them around to make introductions.

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RE: Newbies' Guide to BDSM Parties. - 7/10/2012 4:00:32 PM

ladynlord

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quote:

ORIGINAL: dublinemma
The stinger is they won't let you wear any kind of denim, i live in jeans!! Even black jeans, madness!!

We have found that different venues have different "dress codes" at different times. Some weekends are upscale and denim is a no no for that night, other weekends are pajama nights.
Halloween is a great time to go as a newbie!
The advice to check ahead of time and PLAN is the best offered.

BTW, kudos Steven!!

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