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forcedsensuality -> RE: Unsolicited Gestures of Affection (8/10/2012 3:33:55 AM)
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Rick,
It's a little bit easier these days, women do initiate stuff more generally. But in this game, ie many but not all d&s relationships, you can rely on her to initiate !! Either way, it takes some pressure off the guy.
And men have always had to be careful when they do initiate stuff, .. some women are prickly or shy or overly-feminist, but just as many others are just relieved you are showing some interest. And in a d&s you're quite likely to get a bit more unambiguous rule-based ideas of what's the score. Ther'll usually be some sort of signal.
Negotiate .. put it out there, what you feel, .. woman like to know what men feel. Sometimes it takes a while for a man to get comfortable sharing feelings, or getting comfortably making himself vulnerable, admit to weakness etc.., admit to feelings of connectedness, .. but women live for this sort of sharing, this sort of talk !!
And part of the fun in the bdsm stuff is being uncomfortable with a woman you want to impress ,.. maybe she wants to see you in discomfort, share in your suffering, see stuff you ordinarily hide.
it's cool, you might end up sharing a larger range of emotions with her, which is liberating really.
Enthusiasm is usually a good thing unless a woman just finds you pesky and isn't interested .. in that case, as long as she's not being coy or shy, just suck it up and move on.
Even if you've been told to worship, kiss shoes, express your awe in her presence, still a bit of genuinely spontaneous flattery usually goes down well .. your male sexual energy is a bountiful animalistic life-force, make her struggle to restrain that energy of yours !!
as long as it's fun, as long as she's fun .. as long as she's got some give and you can tell she likes you and is actually presently surprised she's got you for her sex-plaything
enthusiasm and spontaneity and creativity .. not to be ruled out !! keep pushing !!
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