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One For The Women - 6/9/2006 9:21:49 AM

Gauge

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Joined: 6/17/2005
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A woman was leaving a convenience store with her morning coffee when she noticed a most unusual funeral procession approaching the nearby cemetery. A long black hearse was followed by a second long black hearse about 50 feet behind the first one. Behind the second hearse was a solitary woman walking a pit bull on a leash. Behind her, a short distance back, were about 200 women walking single file.

   The woman was so curious that she respectfully approached the lady walking the dog and said, "I am so sorry for your loss, and I know that now is a bad time to disturb you, but I have never seen a funeral like this. Whose funeral is it?"

   "My husband's."

   "What happened to him?"

   The woman replied, "My dog attacked and killed him."

   She inquired further, "Well, who is in the second hearse?"

   The woman answered, "My mother-in-law. She was trying to help my husband when the dog turned on her."

   A poignant and thoughtful moment of silence passed between the two women.

   "Can I borrow the dog?"

   "Get in line."

A Woman's Prayer:

Dear Lord, I pray for:
    Wisdom, To understand a man;
    Love, To forgive him; and
    Patience, For his moods -
    Because, Lord, if I pray for Strength,
    I'll just beat him to death!

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"For there is no folly of the beast of the earth which is not infinitely outdone by the madness of men." Herman Melville - Moby Dick

I'm wearing my chicken suit and humming La Marseillaise.

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RE: One For The Women - 6/9/2006 11:32:11 AM

cuddleheart50

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Joined: 2/20/2006
From: Kentucky
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I love that prayer!

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Dance like no one is watching,
Sing like no one is listening.
Love like you've never been hurt
and live like it's heaven on Earth.

(in reply to Gauge)

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RE: One For The Women - 6/9/2006 12:07:56 PM

pierceforpain

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Joined: 6/4/2006
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hehe... i can understand that one usually...

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RE: One For The Women - 6/9/2006 2:17:15 PM

BreakMeShakeMe

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Joined: 6/6/2006
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LOL.. thank you Gauge.... nicely done... and quickly forwarded to dear mom....

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Wisdom is knowing what to do, Skill is knowing how to, Virtue is just doing it.

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RE: One For The Women - 6/9/2006 6:31:02 PM

diamonddreamlove

Posts: 770
Joined: 5/19/2006
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in line and looking forward to my turn. lol . ok maybe not but is tempting especially the mother in law part.

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RE: One For The Women - 6/9/2006 7:33:14 PM

VampireKitten6

Posts: 44
Joined: 11/11/2005
From: Summerville, SC formerly from NOLA
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omgs that joke was funny! LMAO

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RE: One For The Women - 6/9/2006 7:50:26 PM

BBBTBW

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WONDERFUL JOKE....how many did you say were in line....I think I am going to cut in somewhere...LOL....

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"You keep using that word, I do not think it means what you think it means" -- Inigo Montoya, The Princess Bride

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RE: One For The Women - 6/9/2006 7:57:20 PM

forluvofmaria

Posts: 59
Joined: 5/16/2006
From: mountains of MD
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Hmmm, begs the question, How did she train him? Still laughing and glad I wasn't drinking anything......

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Live, Love and Laugh
Life is to be enjoyed, appreciated and treasured

"Only the Heart knows how to find what IS Precious"
Fyoder Dostoyevsky

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RE: One For The Women - 6/9/2006 10:10:42 PM

FootQueen

Posts: 241
Joined: 12/13/2004
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I absolutely love that prayer (saving it as we speak) *giggling*

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Don`t engage in a relationship if there is no trust, for without trust there really is no relationship!

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