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RE: Personal Rant - 8/4/2012 4:37:47 AM   
Whirlwind1


Posts: 10
Joined: 7/24/2011
Status: offline 		Well, darling, perhaps I'm just a plainly spoken person who values plain speaking.

Being judged as being "not good enough" for being polite and respectful rather than the usual "Sub-slut, get on your knees and worship me!"
And then sulking that no real trew-subbies took up his magnanimous offer of humiliation...well what the hell?

Bitchez be crazy!

(in reply to SpaceSpank)
Profile   Post #: 41
RE: Personal Rant - 8/4/2012 4:48:46 AM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline 		An off topic question.

Quite often, these rants include some version of the belief that unwanted, generic mail, to offer something (or someone) that isn't wanted is not spam. If that's the case, exactly what does constitute spam and what is the difference between that and what people are doing?



_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to Whirlwind1)
Profile   Post #: 42
RE: Personal Rant - 8/4/2012 4:58:23 AM   
kalikshama


Posts: 14805
Joined: 8/8/2010
Status: offline
quote:

Is sending a message that says "hello." followed by a question such as "Was wondering if you are still looking for a daddy." (to those who's profile says they are still looking) Is that such an offensive thing?


Agrees that "it's not offensive. It's simply unoriginal and uninspiring of a response."

Read at least the OP in this thread to learn how you can up your game: For men: how to find a woman here

Read the last few pages of The worst Dom you've ever met to see what your brethren have done to women on this site.



_____________________________

Curious about the "Sluts Vote" avatars? See http://www.collarchat.com/m_4133036/mpage_1/key_/tm.htm#4133036

(in reply to AlisterLockland)
Profile   Post #: 43
RE: Personal Rant - 8/4/2012 6:51:18 AM   
risktaker9


Posts: 197
Joined: 3/10/2010
Status: offline 		I'll just add that so many times a guy sends me the same cut and paste offer over and over without noticing that I answered 5 emails ago and said I wasn't interested. Once I actually pointed out to a guy that his latest email was the tenth time he'd written me with the same exact word for word message, and I'd responded after #'s 1, 4, and 7 to say no thanks.

I often wonder how many times a guy will say that he's sent 4 messages that day that were never read, or deleted unread, and they were in fact all to people that he's already written in the past that already responded? I'd say about a third of my total weekly email is from people I've heard from already and responded to. I mean I could just block them and carry on, but it's kind of interesting to see how many times they'll keep coming back with the same old song and dance. Sometimes I even respond to the repeated offer down the line with a response saying we've already spoken, leaving it up to him to check and see.

So if the email recipient is supposed to have good manners according to all these frustrated men, and reply to every email she gets, how does that hold up if she is getting repeat email from someone she already did answer? Want to bet that a lot of the men who come to the forums to rant about women on this site having no manners blah blah blah, are men who are writing the same women over and over and have already gotten a response, but are too involved in chasing their dicks to pay attention to who they are contacting and how many times? I'd say that if a man is having a response problem, he should factor in the content of what he's sending, who he is targeting, and if he's repeating the same targets.

< Message edited by risktaker9 -- 8/4/2012 7:12:11 AM >

(in reply to kalikshama)
Profile   Post #: 44
RE: Personal Rant - 8/4/2012 12:26:10 PM   
poise


Posts: 9509
Joined: 7/3/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: AlisterLockland

Are you fucking serious? Is sending a message that says "hello." followed by a question such
as "Was wondering if you are still looking for a daddy." (to those who's profile says they are
still looking) Is that such an offensive thing? More than that is saying simply "hello" a travesty?
I choose to show some base human respect to a woman and don't get the damn courtacy returned to me?


Perhaps another reason why you aren't getting anyone interested in you is this bit in your profile
that reads "I do have one submissive who I have been domming for Over a month"
Now, if you truly want to be respected, perhaps you can mention in your profile that you are in
an open relationship with this submissive of yours. You know, common courtesy and all.

_____________________________

When the path ignites a soul, there’s no remaining in place.

(in reply to AlisterLockland)
Profile   Post #: 45
RE: Personal Rant - 8/4/2012 12:44:05 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		Or are you cheating on her? Seeking to dump her when you get someone better? Because that indicates your lack of integrity and tells everyone you aren't trustworthy.

BTW if you aren't willing to do your homework, quit school. Stop wasting federal funds that someone who is serious about their education could make better use of.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


(in reply to poise)
Profile   Post #: 46
RE: Personal Rant - 8/4/2012 2:11:55 PM   
DarkSteven


Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Whirlwind1

What happened to

Hi!
My name is *insert name here*.
I noticed your profile, I enjoyed it and I think we might have a fair bit in common.
I'd like to get to know you better if that's agreeable.
Thank you for taking the time to read my PM.

Cheers,
~Nice Dude.



Nope.

1. My name is *insert name*. Slow start, and not really needed.
2. I noticed your profile, I enjoyed it and I think we might have a fair bit in common. If anyone sent me that without specifying WHAT they enjoyed, I'd delete the message.
3. I'd like to get to know you better if that's agreeable. Why? This basically asks for permission to have a conversation. I'll start one on my own initiative.
4. Thank you for taking the time to read my PM. Too genteel, too slow.

Let me use Baroana as an example. If I were to write her, I'd pick off some vanilla stuff out of her profile. (Ignore the fact that she lives on the East Coast, is a Dominant and specifies that her upper age limit is 45.) I notice that she's into outdoor stuff, and would write something like this:

"Hi, Baroana. I read your profile and noticed that you're into camping, horseback riding, and hiking. I'm wondering where that's done in the Newark area."

I'm not proposing play sessions or meeting. To be honest, I'm not about to meet anyone until I know it's someone I'd like to meet, and that'll take some messages first. I'm showing that I've read her profile And I'm asking her a question, which generally is the best way to get a response.

_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to Whirlwind1)
Profile   Post #: 47
RE: Personal Rant - 8/4/2012 2:21:48 PM   
LadyConstanze


Posts: 9722
Joined: 2/18/2005
Status: offline 		You know, if somebody decides to not respond to "hello", they just might not want to respond because they might consider it a bit brief and it not saying much, so why bother opening the mail and responding?

I mean because you sent an unsolicited email to somebody doesn't mean they OWE you a response, the fact that they deleted the mail and decided to not respond should possibly tell you they aren't interested, why do you think they need to spell that out to you? Should they automatically assume that you don't understand?

_____________________________

There are 10 kinds of people who understand binary
Those who do and those who don't!

http://exdomme.blogspot.com/2012/07/public-service-announcement.html

(in reply to AlisterLockland)
Profile   Post #: 48
RE: Personal Rant - 8/4/2012 2:39:00 PM   
sexyred1


Posts: 8998
Joined: 8/9/2007
Status: offline 		I am sick of these entitled guys who think that joining a week ago and not finding the sub of their dreams warrants a rant about mean all women are

Let me say something very bluntly:

It does not matter what you write, as long as it is normal. You do not have to be a super genius, or especially creative, just something nice and normal.

However, it DOES have to be something that I can reply to.

Here is what is not worth replying to other than thanks, if it's a compliment, which I always say thank to.

- Hi
- Hey Red
- Hey Sexy
- Wassup?
-got yahoo?
- are you into anal?
- are you into k9?
- where in NJ?
- are you owned?
- You are HOT
- I know I am married, but please give me a chance
- I know I am 18 but please give me a chance
- I know you are seeking a relationship but don't you just need a good fuck while you are looking?
- Nice hair
- Is it red all over?
- still looking?
- god you sound like a bitch
- will you be my Mistress?
- you are asking too much
- you don't sound submissive
- I know you said no couples but please, we are in NJ right near you
- those who cut and paste their fantasies for my review
- those who write me over and over again and forget they did

Honestly? If someone writes, hi, like your profile and photos, please take a look at mine and let me know if you might be interested, I would appreciate it, is the best way.

(in reply to LadyConstanze)
Profile   Post #: 49
RE: Personal Rant - 8/4/2012 2:49:56 PM   
CRYPTICLXVI


Posts: 3907
Status: offline
quote:

- Hi
- Hey Red
- Hey Sexy
- Wassup?
-got yahoo?
- are you into anal?
- are you into k9?
- where in NJ?
- are you owned?
- You are HOT
- I know I am married, but please give me a chance
- I know I am 18 but please give me a chance
- I know you are seeking a relationship but don't you just need a good fuck while you are looking?
- Nice hair
- Is it red all over?
- still looking?
- god you sound like a bitch
- will you be my Mistress?
- you are asking too much
- you don't sound submissive
- I know you said no couples but please, we are in NJ right near you
- those who cut and paste their fantasies for my review
- those who write me over and over again and forget they did


What the hell are you talking about, you have responded to every one of these messages from me.


(in reply to sexyred1)
Profile   Post #: 50
RE: Personal Rant - 8/4/2012 2:53:28 PM   
sexyred1


Posts: 8998
Joined: 8/9/2007
Status: offline 		I know, but that is because you crack me up. Most do not.

Anyway, you promised not to tell. Shhhh.

(in reply to CRYPTICLXVI)
Profile   Post #: 51
RE: Personal Rant - 8/4/2012 3:00:40 PM   
CRYPTICLXVI


Posts: 3907
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sexyred1

I know, but that is because you crack me up. Most do not.

Anyway, you promised not to tell. Shhhh.


Fuck, fuck, fuck... they were all sincere attempts to capture your attention, now I feel so damned used.


(in reply to sexyred1)
Profile   Post #: 52
RE: Personal Rant - 8/4/2012 3:03:52 PM   
sexyred1


Posts: 8998
Joined: 8/9/2007
Status: offline 		Well, if you would have attached that photo like I asked you....:)

(in reply to CRYPTICLXVI)
Profile   Post #: 53
RE: Personal Rant - 8/4/2012 3:20:34 PM   
CRYPTICLXVI


Posts: 3907
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sexyred1

Well, if you would have attached that photo like I asked you....:)








Attachment (1)

(in reply to sexyred1)
Profile   Post #: 54
RE: Personal Rant - 8/5/2012 4:57:13 AM   
ShaharThorne


Posts: 11071
Joined: 2/24/2009
From: Somewhere in TX
Status: offline 		To the OP.

I don't answer because either the person is too young, married, too controlling, wants my number or chat with me.

I suffer from mental illness and fibromyalgia so I have taken myself out of the game medically. No pressures there.

I am heading back to bed. Waking up sneezing ones' head off at 3 in the morning is not fun. At least I was able to complete my assignment on Runescape.

_____________________________

Goddess of Yarn

You are making two and a half feet of irresistible, tubular sex! -Lola, Kinky Boots

Founder: Bitch with Tits

Whip me, beat me, make me feel cheap and have great sex

(in reply to CRYPTICLXVI)
Profile   Post #: 55
RE: Personal Rant - 8/5/2012 6:41:40 AM   
sunshinemiss


Posts: 17673
Joined: 11/26/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: AlisterLockland

Thank you. Though I'm not so great at homework. Thank you for the information and time


Well, let's see... you wrote a rant and wanted information. You were given the hands-down-best answer for that. Read the post written by Stephann - the How to Find a Woman thread. He's not really around much anymore, but he's very well respected round these parts. He's too busy with chicks falling all over him to be on the webs these days (or that's the last I heard)... That post was written 4 years ago, and we still refer to it. That should tell you how pervasive the "Why don't women answer me?" stuff is.

You know what? When a dude wolf whistles at me, I don't usually respond then either.

Is it offensive what you write?

YES

And you want to know why? I've spent time on my profile. I started the conversation by saying, "Hey folks, here is the kind of person I am. I'm XY and Z. I like AB and C. I live here and there, This is how I think." I have expressed myself with great clarity and (I think) wit. Maybe a little charm on a good day. And your response to all that is, "Hello. Are you still looking for a daddy?" You know what I think about men like that?

THEY ARE NOT SMART ENOUGH FOR ME.

So, yes, your notes are offensive. They offend my intelligence. They offend the decent and kind human being I am by turning me into nothing but a slot filler. I'm no slot filler. Your inane letters are merely searches for slot fillers.

Go buy a damn blow-up doll

I am an amazing, beautiful, successful, brilliant, fascinating woman. I have better things to do than to answer trite nonsense.

YOU DON'T DESERVE ME.


*edit for grammar and to add link to Stephann's thread.

< Message edited by sunshinemiss -- 8/5/2012 6:49:25 AM >

_____________________________

Yes, I am a wonton hussy... and still sweet as 3.14

(in reply to AlisterLockland)
Profile   Post #: 56
RE: Personal Rant - 8/5/2012 7:14:27 AM   
LadyHibiscus


Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline 		I LOVE SUNSHINEMISS.

_____________________________

[page 23 girl]



(in reply to sunshinemiss)
Profile   Post #: 57
RE: Personal Rant - 8/5/2012 7:26:25 AM   
SpaceSpank


Posts: 244
Joined: 10/3/2010
Status: offline 		I won't even berate the OP. It sounds like he is looking at this all from the frame of mind of walking up to a person in the street, a bar, an event, whatever, and saying hello... In cases like that... yes, it's rude if they don't answer (and some people are indeed rude enough not to reply even in person).

But that is the wrong way to look at it. As I mentioned in another post, there is ZERO way for you to differentiate your message in someone's inbox from every other message there. Writing the most amazing message int he world and including a great picture will look the exact same as the 50+ cock shots with 10 words or less in her inbox unless she takes the time to either click on them all, or hover over them to preview if it's worth her time.

In many cases... they just wont. If you're unlucky enough to be at a point that is beyond her threshold to give a shit for that day, you're going to either get deleted unread, or be in the unread message limbo.

And that's if you have done everything right. If you put in something that says nothing, then you have just lowered your chances of a reply exponentially.

(in reply to LadyHibiscus)
Profile   Post #: 58
RE: Personal Rant - 8/5/2012 7:42:46 AM   
Baroana


Posts: 1480
Joined: 11/13/2011
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven


quote:

ORIGINAL: Whirlwind1

What happened to

Hi!
My name is *insert name here*.
I noticed your profile, I enjoyed it and I think we might have a fair bit in common.
I'd like to get to know you better if that's agreeable.
Thank you for taking the time to read my PM.

Cheers,
~Nice Dude.



Nope.

1. My name is *insert name*. Slow start, and not really needed.
2. I noticed your profile, I enjoyed it and I think we might have a fair bit in common. If anyone sent me that without specifying WHAT they enjoyed, I'd delete the message.
3. I'd like to get to know you better if that's agreeable. Why? This basically asks for permission to have a conversation. I'll start one on my own initiative.
4. Thank you for taking the time to read my PM. Too genteel, too slow.

Let me use Baroana as an example. If I were to write her, I'd pick off some vanilla stuff out of her profile. (Ignore the fact that she lives on the East Coast, is a Dominant and specifies that her upper age limit is 45.) I notice that she's into outdoor stuff, and would write something like this:

"Hi, Baroana. I read your profile and noticed that you're into camping, horseback riding, and hiking. I'm wondering where that's done in the Newark area."

I'm not proposing play sessions or meeting. To be honest, I'm not about to meet anyone until I know it's someone I'd like to meet, and that'll take some messages first. I'm showing that I've read her profile And I'm asking her a question, which generally is the best way to get a response.



Thanks, DarkSteven, I'm flattered :)

I think your way of writing to someone is definitely better than the "Hi, my name is..." approach.

However, the "Hi, my name is..." approach is still in the upper 90th percentile of messages I get. Chances are, I will give that message some sort of response out of courtesy. As people here have said a million times, such a response comes out of courtesy, not obligation. There's no obligation to respond. Moreover, courtesy often must be sacrificed on this site in order to avoid being pestered and harassed by HNG's.

(in reply to DarkSteven)
Profile   Post #: 59
RE: Personal Rant - 8/5/2012 7:54:55 AM   
Yachtie


Posts: 3593
Joined: 1/18/2012
Status: offline 		fr







Attachment (1)

_____________________________

“We all know it’s going to end badly, but in the meantime we can make some money.” - Jim Cramer, CNBC

“Those who ‘abjure’ violence can only do so because others are committing violence on their behalf.” - George Orwell

(in reply to Baroana)
Profile   Post #: 60
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