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help with learning.... - 6/9/2006 9:48:41 PM   
DaddysEmber


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Joined: 4/14/2006
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i am new to the lifestyle and i find myself offended some people because of things that i am not aware of. i am asking if any of you will give me some advice to make me a better sub and make my Daddy proud when i encounter others in this lifestyle.

thanks
Namaste
ember
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RE: help with learning.... - 6/9/2006 10:10:04 PM   
LadyNeets


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Greetings ember  lil one,

the only thng  I can offer is to show respect to all about you if they are in the lifestyle and offering to help out in any situation  just as long as your Master is Ok with it.

I hope this helps.

Lady Neets 



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I am not a bitch I am the Bitch and to you I am Mistress Bitch


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RE: help with learning.... - 6/9/2006 10:30:41 PM   
theRose4U


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What is offensive to one will not always be offensive to another. The sad reality of individuality I suppose. I would ask what specifically you are meaning by implying you've offended others.
Goreans are self described high protocol known to make up rules that even other goreans have never heard of and are very quick to judge especially females that don't immediately cow tow because they enter a room. Try that with someone like me and I'd think you were nuts.
How you present yourself really depends on your daddy and what he believes is correct. This should be explained to you. Ultimately his opinions and desires are what will matter.

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Finding a good sub is like sifting through trail mix. You find a few fruits, a lotta nuts and have to sift to get to the sweet and special ones
drama llama

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RE: help with learning.... - 6/9/2006 11:26:28 PM   
Padriag


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Hi Ember,

Well... you just asked a hugely broad question.  If you could narrow it down some I can answer better.  Until then, here's a hugely broad answer

Emily Post's Etiquette, 17th Edition
ISBN: 0066209579

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Padriag

A stern discipline pervades all nature, which is a little cruel so that it may be very kind - Edmund Spencer

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RE: help with learning.... - 6/9/2006 11:37:03 PM   
slavejali


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How have you exactly offended people?

_____________________________

Freedom in Bondage

Different Strokes for Different Folks

"I'll always have a *soft spot* for Sadists"

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RE: help with learning.... - 6/10/2006 12:15:06 AM   
candleTC


Posts: 148
Joined: 5/8/2006
From: Springfield, Il
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Broad questions deserve broad answers, I suppose... and in the case of Rose, broad generalizations regarding certain types of individuals.

Let the flaming and Gor bashing begin.....( smiles sweetly , retracting claws )

Beth

~not your average non Gorean girl serving your not average Gorean Master ~


< Message edited by candleTC -- 6/10/2006 12:19:27 AM >


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~Thoughts are like arrows: once released, they strike their mark. Guard them well or one day you may be your own victim. - Navajo Proverb~

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RE: help with learning.... - 6/10/2006 7:04:19 AM   
ligar59


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While asking for insights into various  topics is usually a good thing, it is no substitute for going directly to the source. How does your Dom want you to interact with members of the lifestyle? Are there certain protocols he has in place for this? I would think that common curtesy and respect is all that he would expect, but then, I am not him

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RE: help with learning.... - 6/10/2006 8:57:16 AM   
juliaoceania


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I will throw in a thought, perhaps your Daddy should teach you what makes him proud and what is offensive in his eyes. Instead of trying to impress 100s of people, you only have to worry about impressing him. If you are doing what he wants and someone is offended by that, then it is his job to intercede on your behalf... It really makes things much simpler. Perhaps you can ask him what he expects from you before you interact with others from the lifestyle? I know I have asked my Daddy these things a few times because I would never want him to be embarassed by my actions. No one is born knowing how to please another

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

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RE: help with learning.... - 6/10/2006 9:01:40 AM   
FelinePersuasion


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If people get offended over something as simple as your new novice'ness they're not worth talking to.

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RE: help with learning.... - 6/10/2006 4:37:50 PM   
krikket


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To my way of thinking..if you're polite to others, show them respect (until they prove otherwise), and just use common sense and manners when you're dealing with others, then you're covered.  If after all of that someone finds "fault" and they're not your Master who has previously expressed his feelings on whatever it is, then i suspect the people who are offended take themselves way too seriously.  To those people i try to feel amusement rather than pity...and either way have little or nothing more to do with them.  If, perchance, they're in the lifestyle, suggest they discuss your "behaviour" with your Master, and let him take it from there..

Good luck
jimini

_____________________________

"And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to bloom."

by A. Nin



When your heart speaks take good notes.





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RE: help with learning.... - 6/10/2006 9:42:56 PM   
mastersayed


Posts: 119
Joined: 3/21/2006
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just read the forums and eventually post your opinions and surf the web for bdsm info and you'll be fine

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RE: help with learning.... - 6/10/2006 10:59:12 PM   
Daddysredhead


Posts: 23574
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From: Northern (yet still part of the South) Virginia
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Ember...

welcome to the wildy wonderful world of BDSM.  I had the same types of questions at first and would urge you to ask your Daddy what He likes and expects of you when you are out and about with other lifestylers.  He's the One you need to please, and I'm sure He is more than willing to tell the others who might be offended in some strange way that they can go fly a kite. 

Redhead

_____________________________

Founding Member, Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's

Do not challenge me to a battle of wits & come to fight unarmed.

Are you really that stupid? ~ Bless your heart

13th doughnut


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RE: help with learning.... - 6/11/2006 11:53:22 AM   
TemptingNviceSub


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quote:

ORIGINAL: krikket

To my way of thinking..if you're polite to others, show them respect (until they prove otherwise), and just use common sense and manners when you're dealing with others, then you're covered.  If after all of that someone finds "fault" and they're not your Master who has previously expressed his feelings on whatever it is, then i suspect the people who are offended take themselves way too seriously.  To those people i try to feel amusement rather than pity...and either way have little or nothing more to do with them.  If, perchance, they're in the lifestyle, suggest they discuss your "behaviour" with your Master, and let him take it from there..

Good luck
jimini
I agree here with Krikket and of course Padraig (in his minimalistic way..grin)go about it as you would in any usual societel norm and for the most part you should be golden..Just remember you cant please all the people all the time....Tempting

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