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Ummmm....yea - 8/6/2012 3:35:59 PM

chicherin

Posts: 1
Joined: 8/6/2012
Status: offline

First of all (wave hand): Hi!
So I've joined this site this morning. First impression, crowded inbox on first 2 hours, 60 messages, more less, at once. Is that really normal here?
And, normally, what are things that I should do, step by side Collarme's Guide to BDSM community? What's the to-do list on this site?

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RE: Ummmm....yea - 8/6/2012 3:47:57 PM

domcouplelooking

Posts: 1
Joined: 7/10/2010
Status: offline

Welcome to CM. Uhmmm.. a submissive female getting a ton of emails is pretty normal. Beyond that, CM is what you make of it. It's a free site so there's a decent amount of fakes and scammers. Pic collectors too. You'll undoubtedly receive the "you're a fake and I'll report you if you don't send me pics to prove it email before long".My best advice is to be cautiously optimistic and try to find someone you can trust to help you get your feet wet.

(in reply to chicherin)

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RE: Ummmm....yea - 8/6/2012 4:21:05 PM

sexyred1

Posts: 8998
Joined: 8/9/2007
Status: offline

Read your profile OP and here you go:

1. You are fresh meat on the other side, so all sub women who are new get a ton of emails
2. There is no direction or to do list. There is this side which is a discussion and the other side which is the personals.
3. You ask in your profile why everyone is asking you about age preferences. That is understandable. You are 22 so if you want older guys, say so, if not, say so, so people know whether you would be open to them. Easy enough to understand.

I think you are very clear about what you want in the profile, so you are going to get those who just write to everyone, use your judgement and have fun.

(in reply to domcouplelooking)

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RE: Ummmm....yea - 8/6/2012 4:24:22 PM

OsideGirl

Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline

What Sexy said. Also, if you get someone that tells you that you've been reported as fake. Ignore them. Official emails come with Gold lettering as the title. Those are the only emails that you need to worry about.

Welcome to the forums!

_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to sexyred1)

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RE: Ummmm....yea - 8/6/2012 4:27:11 PM

ladynlord

Posts: 247
Joined: 1/27/2006
Status: offline

Welcome. The above is great advice. You already did the best thing...filling out your profile. Some of Us actually read the narratives and compare the interests. Now it is just a matter of finding the right fit for you.
Since you already have some r/t experience, that will help you a great deal.
I too will second the answer to your question. Yes, an overflowing inbox for a new profile is common. One trick you can use is to hover your "cursor" over the emails and read the first few lines without having to read or open the whole letter. Any thing that starts out with "kneel b*tch" or "I claim you" will give you an idea of what is to come. Hey, you might like that sort of thing.
Another trick is setting your inbox filter to only get mail from the persons you are interested in. DON'T be bullied into ANYTHING! You can report any mail that you get of that nature. The "report message" button or the "mark as spam" button are your friends too!
Good luck. And don't be afraid to come back to the boards for advice.

_____________________________

‘The radical invents the views. When he has worn them out the conservative adopts them.’

— Mark Twain

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¿uǝddɐɥ sıɥʇ pıp ʞɔnɟ ǝɥʇ ʍoɥ˙˙˙˙ǝɯ ןןǝʇ ʎpoqǝɯos

(in reply to domcouplelooking)

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RE: Ummmm....yea - 8/6/2012 4:28:57 PM

TNDommeK

Posts: 7153
Joined: 3/13/2010
Status: offline

Also if someone says "you are the topic of the forums and fake"..ignore and hide them. I assure you none of us talk about anyone over on the other side.
Hmmm, also, expect people to not be as serious as they claim.

That's all I can think of right now. Welcome.

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(in reply to OsideGirl)

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RE: Ummmm....yea - 8/6/2012 5:05:25 PM

ladynlord

Posts: 247
Joined: 1/27/2006
Status: offline

I apologize to all posters for how LOUDLY my text came out! lol
Just went back and reset things.

_____________________________

‘The radical invents the views. When he has worn them out the conservative adopts them.’

— Mark Twain

_____________________________________________

¿uǝddɐɥ sıɥʇ pıp ʞɔnɟ ǝɥʇ ʍoɥ˙˙˙˙ǝɯ ןןǝʇ ʎpoqǝɯos

(in reply to TNDommeK)

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RE: Ummmm....yea - 8/6/2012 5:55:56 PM

twreck2

Posts: 16
Joined: 4/2/2011
Status: offline

Welcome...have fun!

(in reply to chicherin)

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RE: Ummmm....yea - 8/6/2012 6:22:30 PM

Shininglight23

Posts: 1336
Status: offline

Hi there..

First.. Welcome to the forums!

Second... Your experience with the emails is so far typical. You've gotten a lot of great advice... Do what works for you.. learn.. explore.. meet people.. don't meet people.. respond to email.. or don't.

Your journey is up to you.. Good luck!

-Allie

(in reply to twreck2)

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RE: Ummmm....yea - 8/6/2012 9:03:04 PM

DomMeinCT

Posts: 2355
Joined: 5/5/2005
Status: offline

The more specific you are in your profile (age limits, no cyber, no long distance), the more guidance you give others, the better you can focus on connecting with the right dom for you.

Responding to others or not is your prerogative. Do you open all the junk mail that comes into your mailbox? You don't have to here either.

Also, if it sounds like bullshit, it probably is bullshit. Someone being a jerk and you don't want to deal with them? Delete their emails and block them. Plenty of nice domly fish in the sea and no need to deal with the rotten ones.

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The meeting of two personalities is like the contact of two chemical substances:
if there is any reaction, both are transformed.
~ Carl Jung

(in reply to chicherin)

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RE: Ummmm....yea - 8/6/2012 9:23:23 PM

Delilya

Posts: 4108
Joined: 2/2/2011
Status: offline

Best of luck

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“Love me without fear, trust me without questioning, need me without demanding, want me without restrictions, accept me without changes, desire me without inhibitions"-Dick Sutphen

(in reply to DomMeinCT)

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RE: Ummmm....yea - 8/6/2012 11:10:13 PM

ARIES83