When you first started

When you first started (Full Version)

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lilmissdefiant -> When you first started (8/12/2012 2:25:32 AM)
What were the first questions you had when you first dipped your toes into the BDSM waters?

BambiBoi -> RE: When you first started (8/12/2012 2:46:04 AM)
I don't think there were a lot of researched pointed questions at the beginning. At first, it was all experimental. Questions took the form of "did you like that?" or "was that too hard?" Basically every question where the answer is "it's a matter of choice" or "there's no right/wrong answer" I didn't even bother asking. Most questions of health and medicine (how to sterilize, how to not strike the kidneys) I didn't need to ask because I had a basic background from non-kink stuff. My first meaningful question I can recall was on how certain lubes will destroy certain sex toys. Edits: Typos. Typos are only acceptable when the post is sexy. This post was dry. Except when I started talking about sex toys.

ARIES83 -> RE: When you first started (8/12/2012 2:54:46 AM)
Well not to put to fine of a point on it, the first things I wanted to know were about myself, I wanted to know the categories used to describe what I did, and at first it was almost comforting to go from the odd one out, to a member of a category. Later on I wanted to know how my behaviours, urges and quirks may have come about and this opened up more ways of seeing myself and accepting the various aspects that make up me. BTW, I'm still working it all out haha -ARIES

sunshinemiss -> RE: When you first started (8/12/2012 3:02:17 AM)
I think my first question was, "Who is that hottie, and how can I get me some of that?"

lilmissdefiant -> RE: When you first started (8/12/2012 3:08:56 AM)
lol I kinda meant specifically. Like what did you want to know about BDSM itself. Type slow, my comprehension skills are craptacular tonight lol

sunshinemiss -> RE: When you first started (8/12/2012 3:21:46 AM)
Seriously, that's how it was for me. I just went with how I felt. I didn't really have questions. I just followed my heart and my brains. I'm naturally fairly careful and believe I have the right (and responsibility) to make sure I'm comfortable with what I do. I am not shy about speaking my mind (I know - shocking!) and when things seemed odd or something I didn't like or understand, I just analyzed it and made my own decisions. I read a couple of fiction books and got some ideas and decided what I would and wouldn't tolerate, and then I went and approached the aforementioned hottie and ... well, the rest is history.... good history. :)

SexyThoughts -> RE: When you first started (8/12/2012 4:39:34 AM)
"You want to do what?!?"

kalikshama -> RE: When you first started (8/12/2012 4:49:45 AM)
My first question was, "Can I be a feminist and submissive?" Fortunately, the answer is Yes.

Kana -> RE: When you first started (8/12/2012 5:30:34 AM)
Literally,and I totally shit thee not here, my first question (I was so naive) was, "Why do you have ping pong paddles and no table, dear?" Oh, the gates of hell open to such simple keys :-)

LadyPact -> RE: When you first started (8/12/2012 5:35:07 AM)
Mine went something like, "If this is all about power and control, how do I get it and what do I do to keep it?"

Lucifyre -> RE: When you first started (8/12/2012 7:09:01 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Kana Oh, the gates of hell open to such simple keys :-) LMAO OMG Kana, this quote is SOO delicious! Lucifyre

IrishMist -> RE: When you first started (8/12/2012 7:11:14 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: sunshinemiss I think my first question was, "Who is that hottie, and how can I get me some of that?" That was almost my first question and thoughts also.

sexyred1 -> RE: When you first started (8/12/2012 7:16:15 AM)
I knew I was into this before I knew what "this" meant. When I finally started reading some fiction, I realized, oh, ok, these wild thoughts are actually connected to my sexuality, ok, cool. Then I just tried things out with men who also were into this and never looked back.

RemoteUser -> RE: When you first started (8/12/2012 9:27:15 AM)
My first BDSM partner gave me answers to questions I didn't realize I had, when I started out, so there wasn't a whole lot to ask. She was very helpful and understanding. I suppose it would have been this: "How do I/you..." [insert topic here] I wanted to know how things were done properly and safely; what was expected of me, and what she needed to do. Once the technical side of things was understood I went from there. [:)] I'm still learning seventeen years later.

ResidentSadist -> RE: When you first started (8/12/2012 9:32:04 AM)
The first scene I saw was a leathermen scene with a boy tied to the cross. His Master pierced his ball sack with a sharp pointed steel tube like needle the size of a drinking straw and inflated his balls. My first question was, "where can I get one of those".

sheisreeds -> RE: When you first started (8/12/2012 9:02:13 PM)
I'm not alone? That was the first question. Then it was "Are you okay?". Then it was "What about this?" My first exposure to the scene was a question while on the phone with my best friend laying on my bed after school. I answered masochist, took me over a decade to realize the joy of being a sadist too. I probably have more to add but have to gear up for round 2 . . .

littlewonder -> RE: When you first started (8/12/2012 9:20:53 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: lilmissdefiant What were the first questions you had when you first dipped your toes into the BDSM waters? What the fuck am I doing??? But I said that about anyone I was fucking at the time lol. Other than that, honestly, I never had any. It just came naturally to me. And the only question I ever had about with Master is "Is this who and what I want?".

NiceButMeanGirl -> RE: When you first started (8/12/2012 9:40:18 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: lilmissdefiant Like what did you want to know about BDSM itself. Can I have BDSM and a love & kisses type relationship all at the same time? Fortunately, I found out the answer is "yes." [:D] NBMG

ProlificNeeds -> RE: When you first started (8/13/2012 5:42:08 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: lilmissdefiant What were the first questions you had when you first dipped your toes into the BDSM waters? "Holy crap what is THAT?!" Said while pointing to set of full manicles and chains. "Are you really going to HIT me with that?" Said while staring down at a moosehide flogger.

Karnikula -> RE: When you first started (8/13/2012 10:23:28 AM)
Why would a mentally healthy person ever want to submit to someone else voluntarily?

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