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RE: Contracts and/or agreements - 8/28/2012 8:51:54 AM   
JeffBC


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Kana
We're adults. Her contract is her word. The day I can't trust her, she is gone, jettisoned. And the same hold true for moi.

Well yeah sure. I suspect pretty much everyone else would say the same thing. But you and I have it easy here because even if we did bother to write a contract it'd be about 1 line long. In a TPE relationship there just isn't much to write about. I can easily see how it'd be useful to document things if limits and boundaries were complex. I can also see how writing things down is a great way to organize one's thoughts.

Insofar as who writes the first draft to me it wouldn't make any different. Somehow, at the end of the process, both parties must have their important points embedded in the contract. Whether he starts, she starts, or they both start doesn't really matter so long as the end state is achieved. All that being said, if I was doing such a document I'd probably have us both write our own sides independently then reconcile them much like OsideGirl said.


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RE: Contracts and/or agreements - 8/28/2012 9:12:06 AM   
Kana


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quote:

But you and I have it easy here because even if we did bother to write a contract it'd be about 1 line long. In a TPE relationship there just isn't much to write about.


Cha-ching.
And that right there is why go TPE.
It's sooooooooo much simpler for everyone involved...

...well, except when she kneeling with heavy clips on ears, lips north and south and nips, two fingers in her ass and cunt and I'm yanking hard on the heavy clamp chained to her tongue.

And hey, that's just kneeling for dinnertime.The real fun begins when I put the fork down...

< Message edited by Kana -- 8/28/2012 9:13:28 AM >


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RE: Contracts and/or agreements - 8/28/2012 12:33:15 PM   
Restyles


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Focus50



And you should stay away from "doms" who need the sub to lead....



A demand for the sub to write out terms of a contract is in no way having them "lead". Particularly early in a relationship it is a valuable way to learn about them, especially if youre skilled at reading the blank spaces.

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RE: Contracts and/or agreements - 8/28/2012 1:06:37 PM   
OsideGirl


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Restyles


quote:

ORIGINAL: Focus50



And you should stay away from "doms" who need the sub to lead....



A demand for the sub to write out terms of a contract is in no way having them "lead". Particularly early in a relationship it is a valuable way to learn about them, especially if youre skilled at reading the blank spaces.


I disagree. You're asking the submissive to set the tone of the relationship. And the submissives aren't psychic, they deserve the same opportunity to learn about their partner.


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RE: Contracts and/or agreements - 8/28/2012 5:13:47 PM   
culareD


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quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl

quote:

ORIGINAL: Restyles


quote:

ORIGINAL: Focus50



And you should stay away from "doms" who need the sub to lead....



A demand for the sub to write out terms of a contract is in no way having them "lead". Particularly early in a relationship it is a valuable way to learn about them, especially if youre skilled at reading the blank spaces.


I disagree. You're asking the submissive to set the tone of the relationship. And the submissives aren't psychic, they deserve the same opportunity to learn about their partner.




True...and frustrating.


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RE: Contracts and/or agreements - 8/28/2012 6:23:58 PM   
DesFIP


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From: Apple County NY
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Like others have said, the greatest usage comes in the writing. Because you have to fully think out what it is you want and need. If you can't figure out how to say it in black and white, then you haven't fully figured it out.

And I don't think it means the sub is in charge. It's a way to see if you're compatible. And if you aren't, then it doesn't matter what title you give yourself, the relationship will still end in tears.

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