RE: Worst. Domme. Pickup Line. EVER!

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RE: Worst. Domme. Pickup Line. EVER! - 9/20/2012 6:21:53 PM

Jaquin

Posts: 156
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Having the same issue. Tis sad.

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RE: Worst. Domme. Pickup Line. EVER! - 9/21/2012 8:14:10 AM

Tantriqu

Posts: 2026
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Another old chestnut:
'How big is yr strapon?' [with variations on the spelling of 'strap-on', including some freudian 'stRAPEons'.
I tell them it's not the size of the ship but the motion of the ocean, and I although I always buy new, I start with the dainty and never go beyond daring.
Alas, size-queens are never satisfied, and good men get scared.
This is how I imagine they imagine it, complete with triumphant trumpets in the background:
http://skd-online-collection.skd.museum/de/contents/show?id=117276
Can't upload the pic: if you can't see it, google: Trinkhorn (Greifenklaue) wohl Prag, um 1400

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RE: Worst. Domme. Pickup Line. EVER! - 9/21/2012 1:47:02 PM

hairlover123

Posts: 71
Joined: 4/1/2012
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Is it bad that 75 percent of these comments came from me? :/ hahaha :p

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RE: Worst. Domme. Pickup Line. EVER! - 9/21/2012 3:50:36 PM

Arturas

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She and her husband are in an open marriage but still he does not want to be a part of this and we don't have a phone at the house but I have a cell phone...

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RE: Worst. Domme. Pickup Line. EVER! - 9/21/2012 7:11:45 PM

Alecta

Posts: 1355
Joined: 1/19/2010
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On that note, one of the better pickup lines I've ever received (on the vanilla side) was a picture of the most adorable kitty in a guy's (clothed) lap. No face pic.

Unfortunately, I could not like him enough to meet the kitty.

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RE: Worst. Domme. Pickup Line. EVER! - 9/21/2012 8:13:31 PM

Tantriqu

Posts: 2026
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I love big appropriate words.
Recently, it's been more moobs, pubes and big black d*cks, which seems like a gay=bear lovers' paradise.

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RE: Worst. Domme. Pickup Line. EVER! - 9/21/2012 9:16:15 PM

VeryMercurial

Posts: 620
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I want to offer you, my virgin ass!

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RE: Worst. Domme. Pickup Line. EVER! - 9/21/2012 9:45:35 PM

Tantriqu

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That's what they all say :-)
And some very, very sweetly/whisperingly/moaningly indeed!

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RE: Worst. Domme. Pickup Line. EVER! - 9/25/2012 11:44:42 PM

MistressDarkArt

Posts: 5178
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Just got one today. No hello (which always bugs the befukfest out of me):

"What will it take for you to put out a cigarette on me below the waist"

"Nothing much, really. You would just have to be somebody else."

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RE: Worst. Domme. Pickup Line. EVER! - 9/26/2012 12:39:13 PM

QueenRah

Posts: 380
Joined: 6/3/2005
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FR

OOh! Ooh! Mister Kotter! I just got mine!:

"wow, very nice u make my 9 inch smackel go right up"

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RE: Worst. Domme. Pickup Line. EVER! - 9/26/2012 12:50:53 PM

VioletViolence

Posts: 169
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Smackel?

No man should ever refer to his penis in that manner.

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RE: Worst. Domme. Pickup Line. EVER! - 9/26/2012 1:07:12 PM

Ninebelowzero

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Do you take it up the dirt box on the first date?

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RE: Worst. Domme. Pickup Line. EVER! - 9/26/2012 5:27:03 PM

MistressDarkArt

Posts: 5178
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quote:

ORIGINAL: QueenRah

FR

OOh! Ooh! Mister Kotter! I just got mine!:

"wow, very nice u make my 9 inch smackel go right up"

He probably meant 'schmekel' which is a diminutive form of the Yiddish term 'schmuck' (who doesn't know what THAT means!). Schmekel (and putz, for those wanting to increase their Yiddish vocabulary) is used as a derogatory term for penis i.e. 'dick'.

< Message edited by MistressDarkArt -- 9/26/2012 5:29:01 PM >

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RE: Worst. Domme. Pickup Line. EVER! - 9/26/2012 6:06:19 PM

lizi

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quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressDarkArt

Just got one today. No hello (which always bugs the befukfest out of me):

"What will it take for you to put out a cigarette on me below the waist"

"Nothing much, really. You would just have to be somebody else."

I got that one too just the other day, this is a repeat offender from way back. I wrote back "You again. Haven't you found someone to do this yet?" He said, "one, but she was not to my liking."

Sigh.

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RE: Worst. Domme. Pickup Line. EVER! - 9/27/2012 2:46:04 PM

QueenRah

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quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressDarkArt

quote:

ORIGINAL: QueenRah

FR

OOh! Ooh! Mister Kotter! I just got mine!:

"wow, very nice u make my 9 inch smackel go right up"

He probably meant 'schmekel' which is a diminutive form of the Yiddish term 'schmuck' (who doesn't know what THAT means!). Schmekel (and putz, for those wanting to increase their Yiddish vocabulary) is used as a derogatory term for penis i.e. 'dick'.

That fella (this is him -->

) must have gotten as far as line I or II of my profile and thought he'd wow me with a nod to my use of a Yiddish word (I spelt it "zaftig").

Anyway, among all the typical, bad introductory words of courtship, many of which have already been shared by other unfortunate Dominas, here, he wins the biscuit, in my book.

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RE: Worst. Domme. Pickup Line. EVER! - 9/27/2012 4:40:26 PM

MistressDarkArt

Posts: 5178
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quote:

ORIGINAL: QueenRah

That fella (this is him --> ) must have gotten as far as line I or II of my profile and thought he'd wow me with a nod to my use of a Yiddish word (I spelt it "zaftig").

Anyway, among all the typical, bad introductory words of courtship, many of which have already been shared by other unfortunate Dominas, here, he wins the biscuit, in my book.

Oh, how sweet of him to try to accommodate you!

Well, at least he knows we zaftig chicks ROCK!

Btw, QR, I see your

and will you raise you one

! (Any excuse to use the dancing pineapple!)

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RE: Worst. Domme. Pickup Line. EVER! - 9/28/2012 9:35:00 AM

QueenRah

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quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressDarkArt

Btw, QR, I see your and will you raise you one! (Any excuse to use the dancing pineapple!)

And I raise you a B-52s connection to that, there

- "Strobelight."

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RE: Worst. Domme. Pickup Line. EVER! - 10/6/2012 6:04:39 AM

Tantriqu

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Lol, fabulous profile pic of a t-shirt [never thought I'd ever type those words] and the nice chest under it: the front of which reads:
Strap-on Dommes: /
Please enter at rear
;-)

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RE: Worst. Domme. Pickup Line. EVER! - 10/11/2012 1:51:24 AM

Alecta

Posts: 1355
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lol! awesome shirt!

Here's one from right now:

quote:

Alecta on 10/11/12 at 1:36 AM:
It is hilarious that you picked the one most insulting thing you could possibly imagine to say.

**censor** on 10/11/12 at 1:36 AM:
i have a lot to say Ma'am

**censor** on 10/11/12 at 1:33 AM:
age and location and i do believe your existence

Alecta on 10/11/12 at 1:32 AM:
and what qualifies me?

**censor** on 10/11/12 at 1:17 AM:
Complete obedience, respect, no negotiation from my side, other than (yes Miss)

Alecta on 10/11/12 at 1:16 AM:
what qualifies you?

**censor** on 10/11/12 at 1:15 AM:
yes Miss, may i offer myself for a complete service?

Alecta on 10/11/12 at 1:14 AM:
yea... when you send messages saying "can i say something" that's a message too. Spit it out or swallow it.

**censor** on 10/11/12 at 1:13 AM:
no i did not yet, i am interested to say something if you give me the permission

Alecta on 10/11/12 at 1:12 AM:
aren't you already?

**censor** on 10/11/12 at 1:09 AM:
Hi may i say something please?

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Post #: 159

RE: Worst. Domme. Pickup Line. EVER! - 10/13/2012 7:42:53 PM

Tantriqu

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Ladies, anyone else get the first-contact pic of a orange furry with groin cut-out that looks like a morbidly obese myopic dude in a cheap US-sport mascot/ewok suit after he fell in a vat of Tang? No? Just me? lucky . . .

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Post #: 160