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Looking for understanding domme - 9/7/2012 11:17:38 AM

garybrown300

Posts: 8
Joined: 9/2/2011
Status: offline

Hello. I'm a sub male living in NYC. All of my experience has been online. I'm looking for a domme who'd like to have some control and use me for her amusement online.
I live to serve and find it very exciting to be pushed to please a domme. I get addicted easily.
The difficult thing is that I am married. I wanted to be upfront and honest with you. I Love my wife very much, but she can not find a way to experiment in this field. I've encouraged her to read articles, talk to other dommes, and check out websites to no avail.

I understand if this is a problem for you, but I'm desperately looking for someone to give some control to while being discreet. I'm not looking to meet anyone in real life.
Thanks for your time miss.

If you'd like to talk, please send a message to my profile as I might miss if if you just reply here. Thank you

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RE: Looking for understanding domme - 9/7/2012 11:41:46 AM

Killerangel

Posts: 1169
Joined: 8/3/2010
Status: offline

Hello and welcome to Collarchat.

It might be nice to mention if your wife knows you are here looking for online fun and games? Some women will accept that, while most will not opt for the behind your wife's back scenario. I'll be honest with you, it's going to be hard finding a Domme, much less finding one that wants online only without the whole discreet thing going on. You will find that there are about a bazillion male submissives and not all that many lifestyle female Dominants.
But hey, good luck with things.

(in reply to garybrown300)

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RE: Looking for understanding domme - 9/7/2012 12:00:36 PM

MistressDarkArt

Posts: 5178
Status: offline

Welcome Gary. You're in a pickle, aren't you? Or should I say your pickle is in a pickle.

I see 3 pretty clear-cut choices here: 1) get out your wallet and pay a prodomme for online attention. The decent thing to do would be to offer your wife the same amount of $$ you spend on pros to do something special. Maybe there are needs of hers that aren't being met 2) Accept a guy for your dominant as in general they're more likely to wanna play this game without charge. Most 'dommes' on the other side are wankers posing as women anyway...just go with the fantasy. 3) Ask your wife what she expects you to do about your situation, then do it. You wanted control; do what she says.

Best of luck to you.

< Message edited by MistressDarkArt -- 9/7/2012 12:02:21 PM >

(in reply to garybrown300)

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RE: Looking for understanding domme - 9/7/2012 12:02:21 PM

LadyHibiscus

Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline

I like MDA's answer.

Good luck with that thing you've got going on there.

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[page 23 girl]

(in reply to MistressDarkArt)

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RE: Looking for understanding domme - 9/7/2012 12:09:59 PM

TNDommeK

Posts: 7153
Joined: 3/13/2010
Status: offline

MDA's answer as well. Welcome.

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(in reply to LadyHibiscus)

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RE: Looking for understanding domme - 9/7/2012 12:33:56 PM

LadyPact

Posts: 32566
Status: offline

Welcome to the forums, OP.

Along with what MDA's advice, (notice how many folks are agreeing with that assessment?) the only thing I have to offer is suggesting a book. The title is "When Someone You Love is Kinky." You may want to invest in a copy.

< Message edited by LadyPact -- 9/7/2012 12:34:37 PM >

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(in reply to TNDommeK)

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RE: Looking for understanding domme - 9/7/2012 1:19:57 PM

AthenaSurrenders

Posts: 3582
Joined: 3/15/2012
Status: offline

Welcome OP.

In addition to the excellent advice you've already received, you might also want to put what you've typed here into your profile, along with some information about what you are like as a person. As has already been pointed out, there are oodles of male subs looking for online domination, and very few female dominants, so you are in direct competition with a lot of other people. Added to that a lot of dommes won't be interested because you are married, that really narrows down the field and ups your competition. If you have a profile with no information and just a complaint about another user (which isn't allowed, by the way) those very select few dommes you are trying to appeal to won't give you a second glance, because there are hundreds of others guys trying a lot harder.

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Upon the hours and times of your desire?

(in reply to LadyPact)

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RE: Looking for understanding domme - 9/7/2012 1:39:41 PM

OsideGirl

Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline

I love how people try to spin things...

Really, your introduction should read as "Looking for a Dominant woman to be the piece on the side, while I cheat on my wife".

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RE: Looking for understanding domme - 9/7/2012 2:18:57 PM

VideoAdminChi

Posts: 3086
Joined: 8/6/2012
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(in reply to OsideGirl)

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RE: Looking for understanding domme - 9/7/2012 3:16:09 PM

Delilya

Posts: 4108
Joined: 2/2/2011
Status: offline

Nods to VAChi. I agree with ALL of the above. Good luck.

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“Love me without fear, trust me without questioning, need me without demanding, want me without restrictions, accept me without changes, desire me without inhibitions"-Dick Sutphen

(in reply to VideoAdminChi)

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RE: Looking for understanding domme - 9/7/2012 6:44:52 PM

Kaiel

Posts: 748
Joined: 4/17/2007
Status: offline

Welcome and good luck!

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RE: Looking for understanding domme - 9/8/2012 8:16:04 AM

OohAahMrs

Posts: 7723
Joined: 7/14/2010
Status: offline

Welcome gaz, strange that old wife thing, not to mention the on-line bit.

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You may choc the choc.........Oh forget it......

(in reply to garybrown300)

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RE: Looking for understanding domme - 9/9/2012 2:24:02 PM

garybrown300

Posts: 8
Joined: 9/2/2011
Status: offline

Thanks all for the responses...even the snarky one was fair :)

Maybe I wont actually find a domme here, but it might be good for me to just talk to others to explore. Thanks for all the suggestions.

(in reply to OohAahMrs)

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Post #: 13