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RE: why does my age bother people? - 9/15/2012 7:38:06 AM

DarkSteven

Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline

It's not your age. It's a few things.

1. Your statement about saggy old men. That contempt is what you just led with.
2. Your profile is almost nonexistent. You strike me as a young man in a hurry - get a woman, get her into the bedroom, get it on, etc. Perhaps the ladies prefer a more genteel approach.
3. Life does not begin and end in the bedroom. Women like conversation. And shared activities like bicycling together, plays, etc.
4. Marketing 101 - ask what Dommes are looking for. Let me give you an example - there's a Domme on CM that's lesbian, lives in Massachusetts, and is only interested in women age 30 and under. I've chatted with her, joked with her, and occasionally complained bitterly about all the barriers she's placed in our romance by her age and sexual preferences. I've also asked her about someone local to her who I had concerns about. In short, I gave her conversation. She once offered her sub to me for a play session should I ever visit Massachusetts, and if I were a sub, I'd have a very good chance of getting a play session from her even though she's a lesbian.

_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to Musicmystery)

Post #: 21

RE: why does my age bother people? - 9/15/2012 7:48:20 AM

VaguelyCurious

Posts: 5264
Joined: 12/2/2009
From: United Kingdom
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: GreedyTop

*loves me some VC*

*loves me some Greeds*

(I was about to say *loves me some Agony*, but then I realised I was in the wrong place. :p)

_____________________________

Sthetic on FetLife.

(in reply to GreedyTop)

Post #: 22

RE: why does my age bother people? - 9/15/2012 7:51:00 AM

kalikshama

Posts: 14805
Joined: 8/8/2010
Status: offline

I will be very cross if you fail to look me up during this hypothetical trip to Massachusetts.

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(in reply to DarkSteven)

Post #: 23

RE: why does my age bother people? - 9/15/2012 7:53:25 AM

Musicmystery

Posts: 30259
Joined: 3/14/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DomDaddy155

Suddenly I feel like Goldilocks. "This one's too young! This one's too old! This one's juuuuussst right!". People pplace way too much importance on physical age and not enough on emotional maturity.

Age is not his problem.

Though it may exacerbate it.

(in reply to DomDaddy155)

Post #: 24

RE: why does my age bother people? - 9/15/2012 7:53:52 AM

kalikshama

Posts: 14805
Joined: 8/8/2010
Status: offline

quote:

Suddenly I feel like Goldilocks. "This one's too young! This one's too old! This one's juuuuussst right!". People pplace way too much importance on physical age and not enough on emotional maturity.

While I prefer to date men my age or older, I do have what I call the Rhodes Scholar Exception.

_____________________________

Curious about the "Sluts Vote" avatars? See http://www.collarchat.com/m_4133036/mpage_1/key_/tm.htm#4133036

(in reply to DomDaddy155)

Post #: 25

RE: why does my age bother people? - 9/15/2012 8:05:25 AM

WinsomeDefiance

Posts: 6719
Joined: 8/7/2007
Status: offline

I'm 47. On any given day I'll have 2- 6 gorgeous young men in their early 20's stomping around my house. They are like puppies. Feed them, they never really go away.

I've never once been sexually attracted to any of them. Young men are great for mowing the lawn, taking out the trash - working construction, carrying in the groceries etc. but they don't even rate (for me) on a sexual scale because they just don't do it for me.

Now, if you really want to make yourself useful, I can always make use of a strong athletic young man.

WinD

(in reply to kalikshama)

Post #: 26

RE: why does my age bother people? - 9/15/2012 9:09:04 AM

SylvereApLeanan

Posts: 8275
Joined: 11/1/2007
From: Hell
Status: offline

~FR~

After skimming through the replies, I see you've had some excellent advice, OP. I'm going to be the odd one out and say that I'm one of the few dominant women who is attracted to *much* younger guys. You would not be my first teenage boy toy nor, I suspect, would you be the last.

And there's the rub.

At your age, you're a pretty toy and nothing more. Toys are a dime a dozen and I grow bored with them quickly. I'm looking for a submissive guy who has some staying power. You ain't got it. There are plenty of things you can do to improve your situation - be a well-rounded person who keeps current on world events, study philosophy and classic literature, be willing and able to clean and cook a meal more complex than a microwave dinner. Start with those things and go from there.

_____________________________

Sylverë
Dark Muse
30 Fluffy Points
Grumpy Cat is my spirit animal.
Shadow Governess & Mean Girl

"There's something that doesn't make sense. Let's go and poke it with a stick."— The Doctor

(in reply to WinsomeDefiance)

Post #: 27

RE: why does my age bother people? - 9/15/2012 9:30:42 AM

DaddySatyr

Posts: 9381
Joined: 8/29/2011
From: Pittston, Pennsyltucky
Status: offline

Speaking as a not-so-saggy (5' 10.5" and 195 lbs.) old man, I can tell you that I get my fair share of younger ladies that show interest and in only the most unusual of circumstances, I don't even consider tham to be potential mates.

I, myself am in a bit of a predicament. I'm the very end of the Baby Boomer generation and I definitely turned out like most boomers I've met. Ladies that are even 5 years younger than I are, often times, raised by (older) baby boomers and are therefore very different in their outlook on many things.

I tend to be physically attracted to ladies about 10 years my junior but, emotionally attracted to ladies 10 years my senior.

Like I said; there are the rare occasions when a lady has been raised or had life experiences that put our ideals into sync but, those times are precious few.

As a result, I rarely even consider ladies that without more than 5 years of my age in either direction.

I would think that is what you are facing. Ladies see your age as a major hurdle to any "substantial" relationship. I also understand that it's difficult, at your age to find a contemporary that has enough life experience to truly be considered a dominant female.

Better luck to you in the future.

Peace and comfort,

Michael

< Message edited by DaddySatyr -- 9/15/2012 9:34:57 AM >

_____________________________

A Stone in My Shoe

Screen captures (and pissing on shadows) still RULE! Ya feel me?

"For that which I love, I will do horrible things"

(in reply to SylvereApLeanan)

Post #: 28

RE: why does my age bother people? - 9/15/2012 9:34:47 AM

GreedyTop

Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: VaguelyCurious

quote:

ORIGINAL: GreedyTop

*loves me some VC*

*loves me some Greeds*

(I was about to say *loves me some Agony*, but then I realised I was in the wrong place. :p)

Yeah, that probably woulda been a bad idea ;)

MIss you! good to see you over here again!

Cutie *ducks and runs*

_____________________________

polysnortatious
Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

(in reply to VaguelyCurious)

Post #: 29

RE: why does my age bother people? - 9/15/2012 9:57:17 AM

tj444

Posts: 7574
Joined: 3/7/2010
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Unsavedher0

Every dominatrix i have messaged is creeped out by the fact that im 18. would they rather have an old saggy man i dont get it?

First off, you only joined here like 2 days ago! Despite the ads on tv, its not an instant world.. just sayin'

(sigh).. I am not a Domme although I do have my demanding times..

Honestly,.. at this point in time,.. after reading many male profiles, chatting with various guys, had my share of coffee meetings.. those saggy old men want a fantasy few of them actually get, they want someone 10, 20 or more years younger and/or online wank material and that seems to be all they think about (just like 18 year old guys do)... imo, older men are just as shallow and immature.. so dam right I would take an 18 year old guy!!!

But the problem is i want an actual sustainable relationship, not just an encounter (I could get that all day long if thats all I wanted)..

_____________________________

As Anderson Cooper said “If he (Trump) took a dump on his desk, you would defend it”

(in reply to Unsavedher0)

Post #: 30

RE: why does my age bother people? - 9/15/2012 10:21:09 AM

Musicmystery

Posts: 30259
Joined: 3/14/2005
Status: offline

quote:

Speaking as a not-so-saggy (5' 10.5" and 195 lbs.) old man, I can tell you that I get my fair share of younger ladies that show interest and in only the most unusual of circumstances, I don't even consider tham to be potential mates.

This.

I work a lot with 18-21 year olds, and years ago, they were hot. Now they're children. There's nothing erotic about them at all. Meanwhile, several silver-haired women have become very sexy over the past decade or so.

That men are looking for younger women routinely is horse shit. That older women often give up on relationships happens fairly frequently. Would I rule out a girl only based on her younger age? No....but I'd realize what I'm not getting. Are there worthwhile exceptions? Maybe. But they'd still be young, and they'd still be the rare exception.

(in reply to DaddySatyr)

Post #: 31

RE: why does my age bother people? - 9/15/2012 11:36:01 AM

DaddySatyr

Posts: 9381
Joined: 8/29/2011
From: Pittston, Pennsyltucky
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DaddySatyr

Speaking as a not-so-saggy (5' 10.5" and 195 lbs.) old man, I can tell you that I get my fair share of younger ladies that show interest and in only the most unusual of circumstances, I don't even consider them to be potential mates.

I, myself am in a bit of a predicament. I'm the very end of the Baby Boomer generation and I definitely turned out like most boomers I've met. Ladies that are even 5 years younger than I are, often times, raised by (older) baby boomers and are therefore very different in their outlook on many things.

I tend to be physically attracted to ladies about 10 years my junior but, emotionally attracted to ladies 10 years my senior.

Like I said; there are the rare occasions when a lady has been raised or had life experiences that put our ideals into sync but, those times are precious few.

As a result, I rarely even consider ladies that are without more than 5 years of my age in either direction to be "relationship material".

I would think that is what you are facing. Ladies see your age as a major hurdle to any "substantial" relationship. I also understand that it's difficult, at your age to find a contemporary that has enough life experience to truly be considered a dominant female.

Better luck to you in the future.

Peace and comfort,

Michael

My mis-spellings and poorly worded sentence structure were aggravating me and I went over the one-hour editing ability. Sorry. That's the only reason I quoted this (to change things)

Peace and comfort,

Michael

_____________________________

A Stone in My Shoe

Screen captures (and pissing on shadows) still RULE! Ya feel me?

"For that which I love, I will do horrible things"

(in reply to DaddySatyr)

Post #: 32

RE: why does my age bother people? - 9/15/2012 12:14:31 PM

Alecta

Posts: 1355
Joined: 1/19/2010
Status: offline

quote:

Looking for a real encounter with somebody. orientation doesn't matter

Because of this ^

Saying it's because you're 18 is a polite way of saying "you just don't get it".

(in reply to Unsavedher0)

Post #: 33

RE: why does my age bother people? - 9/15/2012 3:11:14 PM

NiceButMeanGirl

Posts: 2756
Joined: 11/4/2011
From: Bellingham, WA U.S.A.
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Unsavedher0

Every dominatrix i have messaged is creeped out by the fact that im 18. would they rather have an old saggy man i dont get it?

Saggy? Is that what you think of older men? And older women for that matter? I'm sure this is not how you want to portray yourself but that comment in itself is spitting out contempt and it's very insulting. It also makes you appear sulky and butthurt. Your profile makes you sound like you're in an all-out hurry looking for a quickie. Most women want more than that. We like conversation and getting to know someone first before hopping into the sack.

How old are the Dommes that you're writing to? It's not only you that have preferences in what you're looking for, they do too. I'm going on 55 and my sub just turned 53. He's anything but saggy. He's sexy as hell! He has intelligence, maturity, interests in common with mine, he's romantic and he's patient, among many other things. He's "just right" for me in every way where someone your age would not be. I'm a very lucky Domme.

You've only been on here for a day or two, so give it some time. While you're waiting for your perfect Domme, read the Ask a Mistress FAQ. There's a whole lot there, so you will be busy for awhile. But that's okay, you're young and have lots of time.

NBMG

_____________________________

I'm now SweetlySadistic1 on CollarSpace. NBMG is an old profile, please see my new one.

(in reply to Unsavedher0)

Post #: 34

RE: why does my age bother people? - 9/15/2012 3:32:39 PM

LookieNoNookie

Posts: 12216
Joined: 8/9/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Unsavedher0

Every dominatrix i have messaged is creeped out by the fact that im 18. would they rather have an old saggy man i dont get it?

You age has always bothered me.

We've been watching you for quite a while now.

(And by the way....saggy old men are handy....where do you think we keep our credit cards and the extra garage beeper?)

(in reply to Unsavedher0)

Post #: 35

RE: why does my age bother people? - 9/15/2012 3:34:22 PM

LookieNoNookie

Posts: 12216
Joined: 8/9/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Musicmystery

quote:

Speaking as a not-so-saggy (5' 10.5" and 195 lbs.) old man, I can tell you that I get my fair share of younger ladies that show interest and in only the most unusual of circumstances, I don't even consider tham to be potential mates.

This.

I work a lot with 18-21 year olds, and years ago, they were hot. Now they're children. There's nothing erotic about them at all. Meanwhile, several silver-haired women have become very sexy over the past decade or so.

That men are looking for younger women routinely is horse shit. That older women often give up on relationships happens fairly frequently. Would I rule out a girl only based on her younger age? No....but I'd realize what I'm not getting. Are there worthwhile exceptions? Maybe. But they'd still be young, and they'd still be the rare exception.

Besides....they don't know all the words to the Beatles albums.

(in reply to Musicmystery)

Post #: 36

RE: why does my age bother people? - 9/15/2012 4:27:10 PM

MissKittyDeVine

Posts: 1054
Joined: 9/24/2011
Status: offline

OP, the next 40 years will go faster than you think ...

_____________________________

Sanity is overrated. Live la vida loca

(in reply to LookieNoNookie)

Post #: 37

RE: why does my age bother people? - 9/15/2012 8:35:25 PM

aamiowa

Posts: 2
Joined: 9/15/2012
Status: offline

Age doesn't factor in nearly as much as one's true desire and ability to serve/submit, etc. Lots of younger guys think it's more about being ordered around in bed or an occasional spanking from me-- while wearing a nurse's uniform....

And while I can appreciate an 'Adonis' as much as the next woman-- In the long run-- substance always wins.

(in reply to LadyHibiscus)

Post #: 38

RE: why does my age bother people? - 9/15/2012 10:11:17 PM

Titaniya

Posts: 85
Joined: 9/9/2012
Status: offline

I'm only three years older than you, and I'm not opposed to dating/pursuing things with 18-year-olds, but the line "would they rather have an old saggy man i dont get it?" would prevent me from considering you for anything beyond a casual level of platonic friendship - and would make even that unlikely.

Who are you contacting? In some cases, you're probably getting rejected based on your age. In others, it's probably the perceived level of maturity.

(in reply to Killerangel)

Post #: 39

RE: why does my age bother people? - 9/15/2012 10:35:30 PM

LanaDeVille

Posts: 209
Status: offline

I'm 19 and I don't see me being interested in you. It's all about the presentation.

(in reply to DomDaddy155)

Post #: 40

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