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RE: Abnormal pleasures... - 8/13/2005 6:39:32 PM   
tade


Posts: 663
Joined: 4/23/2005
From: Tampa Bay, Florida
Status: offline 		We have vanilla sex in together and kiny sex when playing with others. Ofcourse our vanilla and the neighbors vanilla aren't anywhere near the same. Personally I like it split up that way.

Tade

_____________________________

I wouldn't recommend sex, drugs or insanity for everyone, but they've always worked for me.
Hunter S. Thompson

It's a magical world Hobbes 'ole buddy. Let's go explorin'~ Calvin

(in reply to RavenofPK)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Abnormal pleasures... - 8/13/2005 6:59:44 PM   
IronBear


Posts: 9008
Joined: 6/19/2005
From: Beenleigh, Qld, Australia
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: RavenofPK


quote:

ORIGINAL: SentForu



"Be careful Anais, abnormal pleasures kill the taste for normal ones."
~ Eduardo, (Anais Nin's Cousin in the movie Henry & June)


This was taken from a Master's profile here in collarme. This quote, rang well with me. My question to you is, has the lifestyle effected your "taste" for vanilla things...sex, relationships, etc? In a way of weakening the effects of any vanilla encounters you may have had. All open discussion is welcome, as always...:)


Greetings,

It has made me very intollerant of them. I don't hang out with regular people, I don't have "regular friends", and I don't particularly care for them invading my space. But having felt this way since I was a teenager, some 20-odd years, I have found a way to survive, peacefull with myself, without going on some "Post Office-mow-them-all-down-with-an-automatic-weapon-spree."

And no........contrary to what you all may believe.......there is no rule that states that I *must* like or hang out or socialize with sames.

Raven



Vanilla sex or relationships hold no interest for me, however many vanilla people do. All the lifestyle did for me was to place convenient labels on my feelings and guide me into ways and means of self-actualisation in specific areas of my life. I have found however that like Gor, it has altered my perceptions and in many ways showed me that I can be at peace with myself again in specific areas. I moved from a high level of intolerance with some people to a high level of tolerance and understanding of them.

_____________________________

Iron Bear

Master of Bruin Cottage

http://www.bruincottage.org

Your attitude, words & actions are yours. Take responsibility for them and the consequences they incur.

D.I.L.L.I.G.A.F.

(in reply to RavenofPK)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: Abnormal pleasures... - 8/13/2005 7:33:59 PM   
darlingjade


Posts: 54
Joined: 1/31/2005
Status: offline 		A few months back I did a spot of vanilla dating just for the heck of it. While sitting across the table from a nice gentleman one night during dinner out the image of a tabby cat kept skipping madly across my brain. Later,while sipping a glass of wine after I'd gotten home my warped little brain kept producing images of lions and tigers...'g'...

See, the thing is, that while I can respect and even admire a vanilla gentlemen , what makes my heart go pitter, patter is the D/s dynamic. Knowing a man has "claws" that he can and will use adds an edge that I can no longer live without and geeez don't want to.

Another thing that's changed since I began exploring WIITWD in full is that orgasming has become, unless told otherwise, just another biological function of my body. So while I have a high sex drive and can and do enjoy what would be termed as vanilla sex it now has a different flavor for me.

All of that said, I still need and desire those things I'd label as being more human needs than strictly vanilla...ie: Gentle touches, shared laughter, a soft place to land etc.

Edited cause I can...'g'

< Message edited by darlingjade -- 8/13/2005 7:36:18 PM >

(in reply to IronBear)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Abnormal pleasures... - 8/13/2005 11:05:49 PM   
EmeraldSlave2


Posts: 3645
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SentForu
This was taken from a Master's profile here in collarme. This quote, rang well with me. My question to you is, has the lifestyle effected your "taste" for vanilla things...sex, relationships, etc? In a way of weakening the effects of any vanilla encounters you may have had. All open discussion is welcome, as always...:)

It did in the beginning, I shunned vanilla after getting active in bdsm, feeling I couldn't get any real connection and intimacy unless there was some authority or kink involved.

Now, not so much. I have realized that intimacy and connecting to someone is about the individual context. While my primary relationship DOES need to involve kink/authority transfer as part of it, I can thoroughly enjoy and languish in the "normal vanilla" things with other people.

I find there's a special intimacy in sitting watching TV quietly that in some ways is incomparable to the best scene high.

(in reply to SentForu)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Abnormal pleasures... - 8/14/2005 12:39:53 AM   
domtimothy46176


Posts: 670
Joined: 12/25/2004
From: Dayton, Ohio area
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SentForu



"Be careful Anais, abnormal pleasures kill the taste for normal ones."
~ Eduardo, (Anais Nin's Cousin in the movie Henry & June)


This was taken from a Master's profile here in collarme. This quote, rang well with me. My question to you is, has the lifestyle effected your "taste" for vanilla things...sex, relationships, etc? In a way of weakening the effects of any vanilla encounters you may have had. All open discussion is welcome, as always...:)


Absolutely. I find that I am increasingly intolerant of the little deceptions that seem to play such a vital part of vanilla relationships. The lack of communication, the lies, the grudges, the incessant baggage that arises from never-ending power struggles, I remember dealing with these issues but they're no longer a part of my life and I no longer relate to the vanilla mindset.
Timothy

(in reply to SentForu)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Abnormal pleasures... - 8/14/2005 2:54:02 AM   
zaynab


Posts: 377
Joined: 6/20/2005
Status: offline 		I never had a taste of the vanilla life but I would have to say...
uhm.... geez..... let's see....... here are my choices....

missionary position only sex three times per week.... not too loud... and you have to act like you dont enjoy it too much...

vs.

being tied spread eagle with several people who you dont know, massaging your body, and giving you pleasure and pain that is almost equal to all of your wildest dreams, while you buck and writhe in ecstasy with your cries of overwhelming pleasure being muffled by a pillow over your face that you use for breath control......?

Uhm...... hm..... let me flip a coin.....

ok sorry.... I like you so dont mean to be a smart ass but couldnt resist, what was the original question again?

_____________________________

zaynab[DM]
quote:

i used to care... but now i take a pill for that

(in reply to SentForu)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Abnormal pleasures... - 8/15/2005 10:00:28 AM   
cmatrix4761


Posts: 73
Joined: 6/28/2005
Status: offline 		With me, it is quite the contrary. I've found I'm more experienced intimately and have an easier time in what you so blandly refer to as "vanilla relationships". I think perhaps it is a desire to replace that causes problems with BDSM; most followers of the BDSM lifestyle seek to replace their normal "mundane" lives with the spice of BDSM. But, BDSM should only be that: a spice. BDSM should not replace real affection and human interaction; it should just be an enhancing agent. Use it to "spice things up" and I think it makes vanilla love more flavoful.

-- CM

(in reply to SentForu)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Abnormal pleasures... - 8/15/2005 10:41:03 AM   
justatoy2


Posts: 163
Joined: 6/20/2005
Status: offline 		well i suppose it depends on what someone defines as "vanilla" activities. I still enjoy going to the theater and going to art galleries. Although i do tend to find the kink in even the most vanilla of activities. As far as vanilla sex goes, i can't even say i know what vanilla sex is anymore. Sure i have vanilla friends and enjoy them to certain extent. I do secretly try to figure out who is the top and who is the bottom if they are a couple. Sometimes i will be sitting at a PTA meeting and wanting so desperately to gag the wench who won't stop talking...so i guess it has skewed my way of thinking. So even in the most boring of vanilla activities my wicked kinky mind still keeps working.

(in reply to RavenofPK)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Abnormal pleasures... - 8/15/2005 12:31:03 PM   
RosaB


Posts: 852
Joined: 1/10/2005
Status: offline 		It's difficult to have vanilla sex when so many guys can't figure out that just humping on you won't get many of us females to an orgasm. I find it hard not to take control and add a d/s componet to the experience to obtain satisfaction. Don't get me wrong, I loooove vaginal penetration, man on top missionary position sex, but I seem to find I need to control what's happening.


(in reply to justatoy2)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Abnormal pleasures... - 8/15/2005 12:54:06 PM   
cmatrix4761


Posts: 73
Joined: 6/28/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: justatoy2

... Sometimes i will be sitting at a PTA meeting and wanting so desperately to gag the wench who won't stop talking...


Lol: that would be quite distracting at a PTA meeting :D

-- CM

(in reply to justatoy2)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Abnormal pleasures... - 8/15/2005 1:11:51 PM   
MsIncognito


Posts: 742
Joined: 5/24/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SentForu

My question to you is, has the lifestyle effected your "taste" for vanilla things...sex, relationships, etc? In a way of weakening the effects of any vanilla encounters you may have had. All open discussion is welcome, as always...:)



Not in the least. It has expanded the range of pleasurable encounters but not replaced any of the things I found pleasurable before getting into kink. I'd be really disappointed if all of a sudden my likes were more limited rather than expanded.

(in reply to SentForu)
Profile   Post #: 31
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