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Things you've misread/said/heard... - 6/13/2006 2:18:05 PM   
glidewynd


Posts: 91
Joined: 7/2/2005
Status: offline 		All of us have had it happen:  those little things that you say, read, hear...that just don't quite sound right. 

Just now I was downstairs making a taco Hot-Pocket, and the packaging said "Great tortilla taste!".....I read "Great gorilla taste!"  hehe...was definitely something to make me look twice.

One I will never forget:  several years ago I saw a funny commercial for some product that was supposed to relieve "painful gas and bloating".  When I tried to tell someone about the commercial, I instead said "painful glass and boating".  Can't stop laughing about that one to this day.

So let's hear it everyone.... all the things you've misread, said wrong, heard wrong... and fill us in on what it was SUPPOSED to mean!

(and btw...typos don't count )

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RE: Things you've misread/said/heard... - 6/13/2006 2:28:07 PM   
crouchingtigress


Posts: 4387
Joined: 3/19/2006
From: Maui
Status: offline 		Ok I was in a SUPER wal mart one of those giant stores you could cram several houses into...and I hear really loudly over the loud speaker
 
CASKETS OF JESUS.... CASKETS OF JESUS
 
I felt really silly when got to the casheir and found they were selling baskets of cheeses....

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RE: Things you've misread/said/heard... - 6/13/2006 2:30:15 PM   
glidewynd


Posts: 91
Joined: 7/2/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: crouchingtigress
I felt really silly when got to the casheir and found they were selling baskets of cheeses....

LMAO!!!!

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glidewynd

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RE: Things you've misread/said/heard... - 6/13/2006 2:31:17 PM   
siouxie


Posts: 1725
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Southwest UK
Status: offline 		i once intended to say, 'everyone has their achilles heel,' but instead said: 'everyone has their athletes foot' - not nice!

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RE: Things you've misread/said/heard... - 6/13/2006 2:32:07 PM   
CERCKL


Posts: 1039
Joined: 3/4/2006
Status: offline 		About twenty years ago I was coming down from an acid trip and as I walked by two guys in the park blocks one said to the other "What you need in your life is more reverb."; to this day I have no idea what he meant but it left me laughing as I walked past them...I had had all the reverb I could take that evening.

C

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RE: Things you've misread/said/heard... - 6/13/2006 2:33:04 PM   
crouchingtigress


Posts: 4387
Joined: 3/19/2006
From: Maui
Status: offline 		that is hillarious!

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RE: Things you've misread/said/heard... - 6/13/2006 2:46:27 PM   
crouchingtigress


Posts: 4387
Joined: 3/19/2006
From: Maui
Status: offline 		OMG cerkl, that is words to live by..... esp if on acid!
 
I like the little 10 year old boy who was singing...
 
He was a buffalo soilder....dreadlocked lobster....

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RE: Things you've misread/said/heard... - 6/13/2006 9:07:31 PM   
MysticFireTopaz


Posts: 50939
Joined: 4/23/2005
From: Dallas/Ft. Worth, TX
Status: offline 		One time a few years back I was in a meeting.  Several of us from the Information Technology Department were discussing billing plans for our customers, e.g., annual pay, monthly pay, etc.
 
The guy conducting the meeting blurted out, "How about a foreplay plan?"  We all laughed and said, sure, that's that plan we'd want to be on!
 
What he meant to say was "How about a four-pay plan, i.e. an option to pay in quarterly installments.  He turned bright red when we told him what actually came out of his mouth, LOL.
 
Lady Topaz

< Message edited by MysticFireTopaz -- 6/13/2006 9:09:34 PM >

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RE: Things you've misread/said/heard... - 6/13/2006 9:15:23 PM   
missgiveNTake


Posts: 673
Joined: 3/22/2006
Status: offline 		LOL these are priceless. I am drawing a blank on the many times I have miss heard things. Since I wear hearing aids I am always miss hearing things.....LOL

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RE: Things you've misread/said/heard... - 6/13/2006 9:43:57 PM   
Daddysredhead


Posts: 23574
Joined: 11/6/2005
From: Northern (yet still part of the South) Virginia
Status: offline 		Several weeks ago, Master and I were at a club, a little dinner and dancing.  Since we couldn't get to the dance floor (too packed), I kinda danced up close to Master with my back against His chest, very flirty, kinda naughty.  There were people walking past on their way to the bar area (a tight squeeze indeed), and as one older lady (looked like the mother of the bride from the wedding party who was at the hotel attached to the club), went by, Master was commenting on my "dirty dancing" with Him (rubbing my booty up against His front).  Right about the time, this lady was walking/squeezing by, Master said, "Keep on working that ass like that, and I'll tear it up when I take you home."  She looked up at Him, really startled at first, and within seconds, she smiled really big and winked at Him!    With the way I was standing in front of Master, both of U/us facing out, she thought He was talking to her as she made her way through the overcrowded dance/bar area, since it didn't necessarily look like W/we were together at first glance.  W/we both fell out laughing after she went by and was out of earshot.  That brought such rib-tickling to U/us that night, and still does.  

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RE: Things you've misread/said/heard... - 6/13/2006 9:47:09 PM   
crouchingtigress


Posts: 4387
Joined: 3/19/2006
From: Maui
Status: offline 		awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww, i am so glad you waited to laugh till she was out of earshot.....that compliment prolly made her day!!!

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RE: Things you've misread/said/heard... - 6/13/2006 9:54:16 PM   
litleone8620


Posts: 3669
Joined: 6/12/2006
Status: offline 		In 7th grade science we were talking about lower life forms and all that. Well, our teach was having people read from the text book. I volunteer cuz i'm teach's pet and as i'm reading, i hear people start to laugh. I guess instead of reading the word organism, i say orgasm, and didn't even realize it. oops

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RE: Things you've misread/said/heard... - 6/13/2006 9:58:27 PM   
Daddysredhead


Posts: 23574
Joined: 11/6/2005
From: Northern (yet still part of the South) Virginia
Status: offline 		It most likely did...  or at least was the beginning of some really hot sex once she got back to her husband, who sitting innocently at his table in the hotel area, had no clue why his wife was feeling saucy when she got back to him.

That's Master and i...  a couple of kinky "Do-Gooders." 

< Message edited by Daddysredhead -- 6/13/2006 10:00:26 PM >

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RE: Things you've misread/said/heard... - 6/13/2006 11:07:32 PM   
Gauge


Posts: 5689
Joined: 6/17/2005
Status: offline 		Several years back, I was at a supply house looking for an obscure motor that I needed to fix a boiler at a greenhouse complex that our company serviced. This guy behind the counter searched and poked and prodded the deepest recesses of that supply house to try to help me. (It was winter and no heat in a greenhouse is disaster so it was fairly urgent) So, after all of his fine work he apologized to me profusely because they didn't have it. And my quote was, "They say 'Seek and Ye shall find' and you my good man suck." I really meant to say sought.

The guy just looked at me not understanding and I was way to embarassed to try to explain to him. I bolted for the door.

< Message edited by Gauge -- 6/13/2006 11:08:28 PM >

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RE: Things you've misread/said/heard... - 6/13/2006 11:09:36 PM   
crouchingtigress


Posts: 4387
Joined: 3/19/2006
From: Maui
Status: offline 		oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooh god it hurts to laugh this hard!!! tears are streaming down my face and think ill pee on the couch if i am not careful....!!!!!


quote:

ORIGINAL: Gauge

Several years back, I was at a supply house looking for an obscure motor that I needed to fix a boiler at a greenhouse complex that our company serviced. This guy behind the counter searched and poked and prodded the deepest recesses of that supply house to try to help me. (It was winter and no heat in a greenhouse is disaster so it was fairly urgent) So, after all of his fine work he apologized to me profusely because they didn't have it. And my quote was, "They say 'Seek and Ye shall find' and you my good man suck." I really meant to say sought.

The guy just looked at me not understanding and I was way to embarassed to try to explain to him. I bolted for the door.

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