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Rules.....grrrrrr - 6/14/2006 1:05:54 PM

Arpig

Posts: 9930
Joined: 1/3/2006
From: Increasingly further from reality
Status: offline

I have seen a lot of posts of late asking the "right" way to do things...Iam not talking about the right way to wield a whip, but the right way to go about a BDSM relationship.

The answer is really very simple...there is NO right way, whatever works for you and yours, whatever floats your mutual boats...

It matters not at all if you are "collared" unless you and yours feel it matters, and whatever process went into your collaring has exactly the same value as any other...none except that value attached to it by those involved. BDSM is about being who and what you are in your deepest places, therefore what works for anybody else is of no importance, outside of being a general guide....my Pet and I have a relationship that many would question as being BDSM, simply because because that is the sort of life and style of interaction we have chosen. she needs certain things and I need certain things...we have found a way to meet both our needs...it isn't even close to any of the generally accepted predefinitions of a D/S relartionship, and therefore we refer to eachother as "Partner-in-Crime"...it sounds fun, and avoids any of the stereotypical assumptions.

Collaring or, any other term, only means as much as it means to you and yours, it doesn't mean the same thing to you as it does to me, to me it only means that she will not obey any other without prior consent from me, to others it means the collared one won't shit without permission...we all define it for ourselves, there are NO rules.

There is no correct way to thrash an ass, there are good and bad ways to do it, and there are wrong ways to do it, but there is no right way. In this lifestyle there are NO rules, we have agreed to explore and indulge our basest desires, so do it...and outside technical "how to" there are no answers, only opinions.

When and if some body estasblishes a set of rules, I will flaunt them, just as I have the rules of vanilla life....be you, you are beautiful and amazing, not just to a mystical one, you are beautiful and special period. It isn't one's physical shape that engenders beauty, it is the soul, the spirit, you are unique, and therfore there is no predefined set of rules that will apply to how you live your life.

_____________________________

Big man! Pig Man!
Ha Ha...Charade you are!

Why do they leave out the letter b on "Garage Sale" signs?

CM's #1 All-Time Also-Ran

Post #: 1

RE: Rules.....grrrrrr - 6/14/2006 1:14:55 PM

angelface183

Posts: 688
Joined: 4/12/2006
Status: offline

Truly lovely and well said. I could not agree with you more.

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RE: Rules.....grrrrrr - 6/14/2006 1:21:47 PM

LadyNoel

Posts: 17
Joined: 6/2/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORGINAL: Arpig
When and if some body estasblishes a set of rules, I will flaunt them, just as I have the rules of vanilla life....

Well, this is the first post that has tempted me to reply, and I have to say I couldn't agree more. Well said Arpig.

< Message edited by LadyNoel -- 6/14/2006 1:34:39 PM >

(in reply to angelface183)

Post #: 3

RE: Rules.....grrrrrr - 6/14/2006 1:23:04 PM

PlayfulOne

Posts: 1047
Status: offline

No rules, next thing your going to tell me the flogger fairy doesn't leave gifts under the cross.

geeessssssh

K

< Message edited by PlayfulOne -- 6/14/2006 1:33:45 PM >

(in reply to angelface183)

Post #: 4

RE: Rules.....grrrrrr - 6/14/2006 1:28:26 PM

RavenMuse

Posts: 4030
Joined: 1/23/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Arpig
When and if some body estasblishes a set of rules, I will flaunt them, just as I have the rules of vanilla life....

Rules:
1) Domley types by the name of Arpig shalt not go out attired only in a pink tutu and kick the nearest police officer in the backside

2) In the even of breaking rule #1 on finding yourself incarserated alongside a 29 stone redneck by the name of Bubba thou shalt not drop the soap whilst in the shower.

_____________________________

This above all: to thine own self be true,
And it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man.

Owner of metalmiss

(in reply to Arpig)

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RE: Rules.....grrrrrr - 6/14/2006 1:31:32 PM

OedipusRexIt

Posts: 634
Joined: 11/15/2005
Status: offline

No rules in life except those you make and keep. Sort of reminds me of Butch Cassidy :

"Rules, in a knife fight?"

"No rules? Ok, somebody count 1,2,3, go"

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"My name is Inigo Montoya, you killed my father, prepare to die..."

(in reply to RavenMuse)

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RE: Rules.....grrrrrr - 6/14/2006 1:58:41 PM

Arpig

Posts: 9930
Joined: 1/3/2006
From: Increasingly further from reality
Status: offline

Um...well except for those 2 rules of course

_____________________________

Big man! Pig Man!
Ha Ha...Charade you are!

Why do they leave out the letter b on "Garage Sale" signs?

CM's #1 All-Time Also-Ran

(in reply to RavenMuse)

Post #: 7

RE: Rules.....grrrrrr - 6/14/2006 2:24:26 PM

Bearlee

Posts: 2311
Joined: 10/25/2004
From: South Central CO
Status: offline

Lovely! Thank you, Sir.

errrrrrrrr... Arpig.

(in reply to Arpig)

Post #: 8

RE: Rules.....grrrrrr - 6/14/2006 2:46:36 PM

BreakMeShakeMe

Posts: 339
Joined: 6/6/2006
Status: offline

Arpig.... excellent post. And thank you.

Jessica

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Wisdom is knowing what to do, Skill is knowing how to, Virtue is just doing it.

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Post #: 9

RE: Rules.....grrrrrr - 6/14/2006 3:08:21 PM

amaidiamond

Posts: 1793
Joined: 2/6/2006
From: Watford / London
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: RavenMuse

quote:

ORIGINAL: Arpig
When and if some body estasblishes a set of rules, I will flaunt them, just as I have the rules of vanilla life....

Rules:
1) Domley types by the name of Arpig shalt not go out attired only in a pink tutu and kick the nearest police officer in the backside

2) In the even of breaking rule #1 on finding yourself incarserated alongside a 29 stone redneck by the name of Bubba thou shalt not drop the soap whilst in the shower.

Such thoughts! Is enough to send a man to the special hell....

(in reply to RavenMuse)

Post #: 10

RE: Rules.....grrrrrr - 6/14/2006 3:15:10 PM

MrrPete

Posts: 614
Joined: 11/7/2005
Status: offline

I do have to say that was nicely said. But I have to disagree.

What happens at a dungeon when you pick up somebody else's flogger?
What happens if you hit on a collared sub?

Even within a realtionship there are rules. Rules just the same even if the couple decides
what they are.

Society makes rules called laws. Sure you can disregard them but be prepared to pay the
consequense of your actions.

Honesty may not be a rule per se but you'll pay dearly if you're dishonest. [eventually]

_____________________________

Awrabest,

Mr. Pete

Boycott Citgo

(in reply to BreakMeShakeMe)

Post #: 11

RE: Rules.....grrrrrr - 6/14/2006 3:30:24 PM

Arpig

Posts: 9930
Joined: 1/3/2006
From: Increasingly further from reality
Status: offline

So tell me Pete....
What does happen at a dungeon when you pick up somebody else's flogger, is it the same at every dungeon?

What happens if you hit on a collared sub, is the result the same for every collared sub or does it depend on who's sub it is?

As far as the laws, most of WIITWD is illegal in most of the US, so legality is of questionable relevance when discussing what is basically an illegal lifestyle in most places.

And as for honesty...well wouldn't you say that honesty is damned good advice for any relationship, and not just a BDSM issue?

Rules were made to be broken.

edited for better formatting

< Message edited by Arpig -- 6/14/2006 3:32:02 PM >

_____________________________

Big man! Pig Man!
Ha Ha...Charade you are!

Why do they leave out the letter b on "Garage Sale" signs?

CM's #1 All-Time Also-Ran

(in reply to MrrPete)

Post #: 12

RE: Rules.....grrrrrr - 6/14/2006 3:45:40 PM

slavejali

Posts: 2918
Status: offline

I'm disagreeing with your post Aprig. Everyone knows Rule Number 1 is: Master is the Law. and number 2 is: Refer to rule number 1.

Oh wait, I think I'm agreeing with you, why do I have to always be so damn agreeable?

< Message edited by slavejali -- 6/14/2006 3:47:27 PM >

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Freedom in Bondage

Different Strokes for Different Folks

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(in reply to Arpig)

Post #: 13

RE: Rules.....grrrrrr - 6/14/2006 3:55:00 PM

KnightofMists

Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline

GRRRRRR I couldn't disagree more..... I have this whole library of books that tells me without question that There is only one way!

"BDSM for Dummies" Written by Master I.M Jackingoff

"D/s Relationships for Dummies" Written by Sir I.M Lonely

"Dominance for Dummies" Written by Mistress A. Bitch

"Submission for Dummies Written by Slave Doormat

< Message edited by KnightofMists -- 6/14/2006 3:57:11 PM >

_____________________________

Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

(in reply to Arpig)

Post #: 14

RE: Rules.....grrrrrr - 6/14/2006 3:56:14 PM

Arpig

Posts: 9930
Joined: 1/3/2006
From: Increasingly further from reality
Status: offline

quote:

why do I have to always be so damn agreeable?

Because you are a right doll

_____________________________

Big man! Pig Man!
Ha Ha...Charade you are!

Why do they leave out the letter b on "Garage Sale" signs?

CM's #1 All-Time Also-Ran

(in reply to slavejali)

Post #: 15

RE: Rules.....grrrrrr - 6/14/2006 4:06:43 PM

Arpig

Posts: 9930
Joined: 1/3/2006
From: Increasingly further from reality
Status: offline

Good point......hmmmm, must get me a buggy whip......

_____________________________

Big man! Pig Man!
Ha Ha...Charade you are!

Why do they leave out the letter b on "Garage Sale" signs?

CM's #1 All-Time Also-Ran

(in reply to kickinchick)

Post #: 16

RE: Rules.....grrrrrr - 6/14/2006 5:19:48 PM

mastersayed

Posts: 119
Joined: 3/21/2006
Status: offline

thank you for making this point, I'm tired of saying this to people: "whatever floats your boat, gets you hard and makes her wet"

(in reply to Arpig)

Post #: 17

RE: Rules.....grrrrrr - 6/14/2006 7:16:45 PM

Ridilyn

Posts: 5
Joined: 5/31/2006
Status: offline

Thank you thank you thank you. I for one am tired of all this rules bs. Time and again I am asked what are MY rules and get a blank vacant stare when I say I have none other than "Whatever would work for our individual dynamic". You were able to but in a few words what I've been struggling to say. Thank you.

(in reply to mastersayed)

Post #: 18

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