RE: Anal *DUN DUN DUUUUUUNNNNN!!!!!*

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RE: Anal *DUN DUN DUUUUUUNNNNN!!!!!* - 10/29/2012 5:38:17 PM

Kana

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quote:

ORIGINAL: OttersSwim

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lyl5DlrsU90

Relax...

I really hope that's a Frankie Goes to Hollywood video there

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RE: Anal *DUN DUN DUUUUUUNNNNN!!!!!* - 10/29/2012 7:41:44 PM

AnimusRex

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Joined: 5/13/2006
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Wish your guy was here.

I would offer him this-

Dude, try inserting a dildo in yourself once- no, just that small one. I'll wait.

Yeah, it hurt like hell, right? Women's anuses aren't any different- there's no magicall LadyAss mechanism that makes hers any more limber than yours.
It takes a lot of lube, massaging, fingering and stretching before you ever will get to be inside her.

Good news is this is foreplay, and is terrific fun. Have her bring you to orgasm first, so you aren't pressured by being horny. Then when you are relaxed, spend a long time fingering her and massaging her, and if you can rub her to orgasm at the same time, it will be pretty nice for all involved.

Don't try to go from Step 1, "Finger" to Step 5, "Cock" in one sitting; let it take a few sessions. Or a lot. Point is, get comfortable and learn to enjoy the journey. I mean, you are lying in bed with a naked woman. There's plenty worse ways to spend an evening.

And even if you never get there? Seriously, man. Its just a warm opening. Don't make it into the Hallowed Hall of Forbidden Pleasure. Ain't all that.

Now go forth, and mount her like the beast you are.

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RE: Anal *DUN DUN DUUUUUUNNNNN!!!!!* - 10/29/2012 8:26:02 PM

MAINEiacMISTRESS

Posts: 1180
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quote:

ORIGINAL: sexyred1

quote:

ORIGINAL: Curvynewsub

Hi ok so I have been asked my many guys if i do anal. The answer is no, I don't do it. It hurts me. Well my new Dom wants me to work on being able to take anal for when he and i finally do have fun. I understand that there are tons of women who can handle this but i am horrible with pain. I cry when i get a shot. I cuss when i hit my arm or knee on something. I don't like sharp pain. I have given birth and that wasn't that bad but i had drugs too. I want to pleasure him but i don't know how to start getting myself ready. If anyone has any ideas please let me know. The only reason i posted this was because i hadn't seen anything like it yet. THANKS!!!!

PS i am pregnant right now IDK if that makes a difference or not at this point.

If you are pregnant, I would think that would take precedence over having anal sex.

I also agree with Lockit, that if you are involved with a new Dom, why on earth are you discussing this now? I have found that people that focus on a particular act, vs. letting the relationship and sexual aspects develop organically between individuals, are problematic.

There are thousoands of threads on anal sex advice, but I would say that priorities are in order for you, especially being pregnant.

I agree. I'm seeing Red Flags too. If he is a GOOD Dom he should be focussed on protecting your well being (in your current pregnant state) rather than pressuring you into doing something you aren't quite ready for so that he may have pleasure (sounds like it was a Hard Limit for you due to painful experiences but due to his pressure you now feel obligated to try again). Someone earlier mentioned the possibility of infection as well (it's not just vaginal/urethral contamination, but anal & rectal tears also happen). Keep in mind, infection requires medication to treat, and medications are something that should be avoided during pregnancy!!! I don't care WHAT cock and bull fantasy rules anyone in the lifestyle gives you, don't forget, subs ALWAYS have the right to set Hard Limits/Consent--and as a caring mother your child's well-being should have priority over some man's pleasure.

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RE: Anal *DUN DUN DUUUUUUNNNNN!!!!!* - 10/30/2012 5:28:48 AM

LillyBoPeep

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I'm not seeing any red flags - in another post she clarified that he'd only mentioned it and they talked about it once, but it's something she would like to do for him. Subs run into situations like that all the time. Plus, lots of people have sex while they're pregnant. If it's particularly stressful, I wouldn't push it until later. But some people run, go on cruises, lots of ladies belly dance - if she isn't having any other complications with her pregnancy, I don't see a big reason to tell her to avoid trying new things while being pregnant.

IF this is particularly stressful for her, which it sounds like it COULD be, then she should likely avoid it for now. And I haven't read anything that she's written that states "he is pushing for this like a madman in spite of me being pregnant." =p She said they talked about it ONCE.

Anyway - to AnimusRex - I actually wish more guys would JUST ONCE try fiddling with their own hinies, because a lot of them just don't know anything about it other than "i really want to do it, and you should just like it because I LIKE giving." =p

Everywhere else in BDSM we suggest "try toys on yourself before using them on your partner!" or any number of other statements to explain how IMPORTANT actual working knowledge is before doing something -- except here. =p Why's that? There's just as much risk for psychological and physical harm here as with a single tail.

I am really glad that my first anal experiences were with my previous M, who was into anal stimulation himself, and he totally understood how painful it could be, even something small like a finger.

I was actually the "let's go, gung ho!" one, and he slowed me down. =p In self-fiddling experiences, I'd gotten used to my own fingers, but penises are MUCH bigger - hell, even his fingers were twice the size of mine. My thumb was like his pinky. TOTALLY different experience.

I like when anal is painful, that's part of the fun for me, but I'm really glad that I had great experiences to start with. :)

< Message edited by LillyBoPeep -- 10/30/2012 5:29:51 AM >

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RE: Anal *DUN DUN DUUUUUUNNNNN!!!!!* - 10/30/2012 8:20:49 AM

mnottertail

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I can only state the obvious:

Take it up the ass, for christ!

You may quote me.

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RE: Anal *DUN DUN DUUUUUUNNNNN!!!!!* - 10/30/2012 12:00:16 PM

Curvynewsub

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thank you Lilly i guess people didn't read what else i have to say on it. you are my new best friend lol. if it weren't for the fact that i wanted to do it i wouldn't be. at any point i can just walk away. no ware in any written or verbal form does it say i have to do anything. the only reason that it is a hard limit on my profile is because i don't want someone to think hey i can go and bang away and she will be good with it. as far as being pregnant well i am the same person and i am not a bad mother for having fun while i am pregnant. My Dr. wants me to have sex. he encourages it lol. He doesn't want me to go out and sleep with anything that moves but he encourages it none the less.

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RE: Anal *DUN DUN DUUUUUUNNNNN!!!!!* - 10/30/2012 12:35:10 PM

AthenaSurrenders

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I don't think anyone was saying that having sex while pregnant makes you a bad mother. They were expressing concern about you and how the stress may be affecting you, and whether he was taking that into account. Some people replied before you clarified and I'd bet some people replied to your OP without reading the whole thread and seeing your update.

Sex is good when pregnant if you have no complications. Stress is bad. So don't stress about it! Simples! If it happens it happens, if not, well, no rush right? You've got the rest of your life to do it if you really want to.

PS. Have you asked your doctor about anal while pregnant? He may have additional safety info and such. He will have heard it all before so don't be shy.

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RE: Anal *DUN DUN DUUUUUUNNNNN!!!!!* - 10/30/2012 2:55:40 PM

Lilviper091

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I have to say... there is some GREAT advice on here... especially from Lockit... I would be asking Him why it's such an important part when you haven't met as yet, how do you know physically you'll connect anyways?

As for the anal part... I'm no fan of it lol (I keep hearing about these ladies that LOVE it, orgasm after orgasm... maybe they exist??!)
I have tried it three/four times (just to be sure lol) ... I found the feeling does become more... acceptable... depending on what position you're in. I think thats the key... and with a lot of lube and some other stimulation.
Like the others said... Horny, horny, horny is the key!! lol.

But!! I would (personally) wait until after your baby is born... but that's just me! ;)

Good luck sunshine! x

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RE: Anal *DUN DUN DUUUUUUNNNNN!!!!!* - 10/30/2012 4:02:23 PM

Lockit

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One of the biggest red flags for me wasn't the dom, but the young mother of two, pregnant and just coming out of a relationship of whatever sort, being so concerned over this romantic new relationship and jumping right in. When is there time to heal and for the children to adjust to the many changes going on in their lives? Running from one man to another with the romantic ideal of submitting and being so focused on it that one would worry so much... as a former young woman and a mom of a young woman that was in a similar situation, I have to say... hold the horses!

Before there really is enough time to know someone and really trust them, one is consumed with a sexual act? Priorities darlin, priorities. If you can't think about the best way to get yourself emotionally through all the changes, think of how focused you are on this whether he is pushing or not and what will happen if things don't work out. Heart broke? And guess who gets go to on that ride with mama...

Women need to be a whole lot smarter and a whole lot less needy for that connection. What's the rush?

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RE: Anal *DUN DUN DUUUUUUNNNNN!!!!!* - 10/30/2012 9:49:07 PM

littlewonder

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If you're still casually fucking around, make sure you have protection. Not only will an STD affect you, it can affect your baby, physically and/or mentally.

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RE: Anal *DUN DUN DUUUUUUNNNNN!!!!!* - 11/1/2012 1:46:59 AM

Curvynewsub

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Sorry to come off as defensive in my last post. The whole bad mother thing came in from the 'Jerry Springer' comment. I am protective of my children and that is one reason i left their father. My first son doesn't really know him because he was never at home. The child i am pregnant with now will never know him. I have never casually screwed around at all. I understand why Lockit and Littlewonder are concerned for my safety and well being as that of my kids, but my children will never meet anyone until i have known them for months and even then if it is a real need for them to meet this person. I have been doing the dating thing with a child for a year or so now. My ex and i were off and on for quite some time. I also understand that the whole romantic thing isn't smart right now but too i don't see myself falling in love quite yet lol. It takes me a min to fall in love. I want love and i want to give love but i think one can give love without being in love. I am in love with my family and friends but i love most people i meet because i am a loving person. I care and worry about complete strangers lol. I know there is alot more to love than just care and worry but it is early and i don't really wanna type THAT much lol. I don't know everything but i am not totally stupid. I do thank you all for the concern tho. More people need to care about others.

Now that we got all that cleared up lol... I have started taking everyone's advice on the OP problem and it is working wonderfully. I am very proud of myself for being able to do this. Lube is my new best friend lol. I actually am ENJOYING!?!?!?!?! the time i am taking to work on this. I am not stressed at all anymore. I have no idea why i really freaked out that much over something that turned out to be this pleasurable lol. Yes it hurt at first but everything is fine now. My Dr. said that as far as the baby goes i can do anything i want to as long as i don't hurt the baby. I told him what all was going on, he said that i can't do anything that makes me hurt in my lower back or my stomach or puts me under to much stress and i am not to lay on my belly or on my back so i am to stand up as long as i am stable or i am to lay on my side or sit up. My breast are going to be tinder right now so that means nipple play is at a minimum but that is ok. and my belly is a no go to all contact but rubbing and holding.

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RE: Anal *DUN DUN DUUUUUUNNNNN!!!!!* - 11/11/2012 11:36:36 PM

PranksterBtch

Posts: 30
Joined: 10/15/2012
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quote:

ORIGINAL: AnimusRex

Wish your guy was here.

I would offer him this-

Dude, try inserting a dildo in yourself once- no, just that small one. I'll wait.

Yeah, it hurt like hell, right? Women's anuses aren't any different- there's no magicall LadyAss mechanism that makes hers any more limber than yours.
It takes a lot of lube, massaging, fingering and stretching before you ever will get to be inside her.

Good news is this is foreplay, and is terrific fun. Have her bring you to orgasm first, so you aren't pressured by being horny. Then when you are relaxed, spend a long time fingering her and massaging her, and if you can rub her to orgasm at the same time, it will be pretty nice for all involved.

Don't try to go from Step 1, "Finger" to Step 5, "Cock" in one sitting; let it take a few sessions. Or a lot. Point is, get comfortable and learn to enjoy the journey. I mean, you are lying in bed with a naked woman. There's plenty worse ways to spend an evening.

And even if you never get there? Seriously, man. Its just a warm opening. Don't make it into the Hallowed Hall of Forbidden Pleasure. Ain't all that.

Now go forth, and mount her like the beast you are.

Curvy ... print the above post and hand it to your man. It's stellar advice. During your second and third trimester, the relaxin coursing through your body will make relaxing a bit easier as well. Relaxin helps relax the body in preparation for birth. Probably a good time to try ;).

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RE: Anal *DUN DUN DUUUUUUNNNNN!!!!!* - 11/12/2012 5:51:04 PM

NiceButMeanGirl

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Curvynewsub, you said "I have been asked my many guys if i do anal. The answer is no, I don't do it. It hurts me." So, have you told HIM that? If so, why can't he just....GET that? You're entitled to your limits. I know lots of women do like anal. But what I don't understand is this fascination men have with the female asshole. A woman's asshole is no more "made for" getting fucked than a man's. Just sayin'.

Oh, and AnimusRex, I loved that post!!! Awesome!!

NBMG

< Message edited by NiceButMeanGirl -- 11/12/2012 5:55:02 PM >

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RE: Anal *DUN DUN DUUUUUUNNNNN!!!!!* - 11/12/2012 8:45:38 PM

PrincessDonna11

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ok Im Domme but I doubt if I ever would have tried anal while pregnant...there are ways to relaxe of course.....

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RE: Anal *DUN DUN DUUUUUUNNNNN!!!!!* - 11/13/2012 9:52:09 AM

littleone35

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Fo me anal wwas a hard due to a pervious very bad experience with it. It is however something Master enjoys so i decided to try it with and for him. He did not push the issue he waited till i was ready and we sued a small butt plug anal beade and a ton of lube. I actually enjoy it now. Not the intianla insertation that still hurts but we alway use lube and he alwasy goes slow.

Only advice i can give is what others said if you are bound and detrimined to do this for him makes sure he goes slow and have pleant of lube on hand.

Matt's littleone

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RE: Anal *DUN DUN DUUUUUUNNNNN!!!!!* - 11/13/2012 12:17:02 PM

PranksterBtch

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quote:

ORIGINAL: PrincessDonna11

ok Im Domme but I doubt if I ever would have tried anal while pregnant...there are ways to relaxe of course.....

Yeah, me either ... intentionally lol. But hey, slips happen in the bump n grinding, and thankfully the relaxin coursing through my body allowed for the slip to cause less pain than it would have otherwise. Ruined the mood, but at 7 months pregnant, I am amazed how quickly I jumped up and had him pinned under me lmao. Our bodies are amazing.

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RE: Anal *DUN DUN DUUUUUUNNNNN!!!!!* - 12/20/2012 7:21:42 PM

gutsygirl

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The Comfort Plug is made for long wear and stretching, it along with lots of lube work well.

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RE: Anal *DUN DUN DUUUUUUNNNNN!!!!!* - 12/20/2012 9:27:45 PM

TieMeInKnottss

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Ok, first I was nervous about it as well. My prev Dom was smart though (LOL)...we discussed it, talked...I agreed that once I was ready (so the consent was there!). He didn't mention it again, one day we were fooling around & I was really worked up and he was playing around back there and suddenly said (NOT going to gross you with details), you have done XYZ...I think you are ready.. Want to try it? I think I screamed my frustrated answer... Needless to say no lube and a very happy sub... (And before the comments...yes he is extremely large which is what was making me so nervous). Anything you psyche yourself out for is not good...telling you to relax is not going to work...being so turned on that you can't IMAGINE saying no....much better idea.

And despite it not being asked for, I am going to still put my 2 cents in. On Oct 29, you didn't appear to know him & The way your profile reads....just make sure you aren't going into D/s because you want to be cared for and loved. Yes, you may very well find a Prince Charming who is a Dom but just as likely you will find a vanilla one... Read what some of these subs are willing and have been asked to do (and Lord, I always think back to LW posting her Master threatened to nail her tongue to a table & she went and got the hammer & nails). Pregnancy hormones have a way of making us feel vulnerable. I would do "courtship" now...any guy who can withstand third trimester, labor/delivery, post-partum mood swings, seeing you unshowered & crazy from lack of sleep...he may very well be a keeper!

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RE: Anal *DUN DUN DUUUUUUNNNNN!!!!!* - 12/20/2012 9:53:46 PM

littlewonder

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ha ha....consequences can be worse than the order given.

I have a feeling I'll be going through that tonight.

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RE: Anal *DUN DUN DUUUUUUNNNNN!!!!!* - 12/21/2012 7:22:32 AM

mnottertail

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Pregnannt and this and that notwithstanding, here is some Ron Melby advice, and if you think about it girls.............

Next time you girls take a dump (yeah, I know; girls don't poop, so unladylike) turn around and look at that old lincoln log, is your lovers dick that big? Real doubtful. It is lubed, and sort of comes a little slowly until it passes a point.........same way you want to work it backwards, and remember there is a human conditioning that says it is a one way valve, and so you have to sort of get over that too, and all the more reason, but slow and easy and relaxed at first, and there will be this little 'pop' point where you actually suck it in some, and once you are there, it can be somewhat rambunctious.

Hope this helps more than it grosses you out or makes you laugh.

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