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looking for a master - 10/29/2012 9:31:48 AM   
fatgirl22


Posts: 2
Joined: 12/28/2011
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Hi, my name is emma, im 23, plain looking and fat. im looking to be a full time sub. I am new to this but i am willing to try specially with the right master. I am not looking to be treated like shit but more like a loved pet. If you would like more info please contact me.
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RE: looking for a master - 10/29/2012 9:39:39 AM   
myotherself


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From: The cold bit of the UK
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Welcome Emma!

I was a little taken aback by your description of yourself - you seem to lack self-confidence. If you hope to be part of a loving relationship, you should first learn to love yourself. I'm sure there are things about you that are lovely - although we women sometimes overlook those and focus on the negatives

I wish you luck in your search, and I hope you find all the love you seek

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(in reply to fatgirl22)
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RE: looking for a master - 10/29/2012 9:45:32 AM   
Char2688


Posts: 151
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Welcome to collarme....lets work on that self esteem!

(in reply to myotherself)
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RE: looking for a master - 10/29/2012 9:53:33 AM   
Toysinbabeland


Posts: 1693
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From: the other end of Cx's leash
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Emma there is no plain looking...god made you perfectly you.
That is beautiful.
I'm certain, you have a beautiful smile....there are no ugly smiles...

Now, can you tell me anything more beautiful than a human who has a submissive heart?
Welcome.


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RE: looking for a master - 10/29/2012 9:58:16 AM   
JanahX


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If you center your core-being on adjectives such as plain and fat - then I suggest you work more upon yourself and get in a better place mentally before you decide to look for a relationship. You seem to have self esteem problems - which are very detrimental to having a successful relationship.

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RE: looking for a master - 10/29/2012 10:05:07 AM   
sexyred1


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I don't understand why all of you think she has low self esteem.

She simply described herself as she sees herself, nothing more. She did not say "treat me badly". She said, treat me as a beloved pet.

Her profile and journal do not indicate a lack of self esteem.

The comments seem to feel that the descriptors "plain" and "fat" are negatives.

I think the comments thus far reflect more on the reader than the writer.

< Message edited by sexyred1 -- 10/29/2012 10:06:05 AM >

(in reply to JanahX)
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RE: looking for a master - 10/29/2012 10:21:05 AM   
mnottertail


Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
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Welcome.   I am staying out of this other shit, unless this would be an appropriate opportunity to solicit fatgirls for blowjobs, in which case..............

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Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30


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RE: looking for a master - 10/29/2012 10:22:57 AM   
OsideGirl


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From: United States
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Welcome to the forums! There's a lot of good information here.

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Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

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RE: looking for a master - 10/29/2012 10:28:08 AM   
JanahX


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Joined: 8/21/2010
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I guess its because thats how she describes herself at all. Surely there is more to a person than being plain and fat. Im sure that if she provides a picture to whomever wants to correspond with her, then they will come to their own conclusions on her physical appearance. Maybe if she said what she likes to do - or something about her personality, it wouldnt come across the way it does here.

_____________________________

The first rule of Fight Club is you do not talk about Fight Club.

The second rule of Fight Club is you do not talk about Fight Club.


(in reply to sexyred1)
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RE: looking for a master - 10/29/2012 11:33:28 AM   
LoneDevil93


Posts: 11
Joined: 10/27/2012
Status: offline
Hello, and welcome to the forums Emma.

And don't put yourself down because your weight, there are plenty of doms/masters out there who actually have a bbw fetish, much like myself.

As they say more tushy for the pushy. =P

(in reply to JanahX)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: looking for a master - 10/29/2012 2:02:54 PM   
TheLilSquaw


Posts: 2340
Joined: 10/24/2012
From: Middle River, MD
Status: offline
Welcome Emma

I don't see someone saying " I am fat" as them having low self esteem. Sometimes it's true, perhaps the world would be a better place if more people were willing to admit the truth about things. I would rather say I am fat than I am a BBW.. I HATE that acronym. You don't see skinny girls calling them sbw, skinny beautiful women. Uggg.

Nor do I see "plain" as a bad description, hell I think plain looking women are sexy as hell!

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(in reply to LoneDevil93)
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RE: looking for a master - 10/29/2012 2:22:49 PM   
AthenaSurrenders


Posts: 3582
Joined: 3/15/2012
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Hi Emma and welcome.

I also would prefer to be called 'fat' than 'BBW'. To me Big Beautiful Woman suggests one of two things - either fetishizing fat people (no thanks, I want to be liked for me not just for ticking some sexual box) or that it's implied you have to specify that this particular big woman is beautiful, because most aren't.

That said, both fat and plain are often used as mild insults on someone's appearance, so the OP might well attract people who get off on that type of humiliation or have that type of fetish. Which is OK, if that's what she likes. I just wouldn't want her unintentionally attracting the wrong type of person.

_____________________________

Being your slave, what should I do but tend
Upon the hours and times of your desire?

(in reply to TheLilSquaw)
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RE: looking for a master - 10/29/2012 2:24:58 PM   
absolutchocolat


Posts: 1392
Status: offline
i'm sure there are many interesting layers to you. welcome :)

(in reply to fatgirl22)
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RE: looking for a master - 10/29/2012 2:43:06 PM   
LoneDevil93


Posts: 11
Joined: 10/27/2012
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: AthenaSurrenders

Hi Emma and welcome.

I also would prefer to be called 'fat' than 'BBW'. To me Big Beautiful Woman suggests one of two things - either fetishizing fat people (no thanks, I want to be liked for me not just for ticking some sexual box) or that it's implied you have to specify that this particular big woman is beautiful, because most aren't.

That said, both fat and plain are often used as mild insults on someone's appearance, so the OP might well attract people who get off on that type of humiliation or have that type of fetish. Which is OK, if that's what she likes. I just wouldn't want her unintentionally attracting the wrong type of person.


Hmm I'm sorry for posting this knowing that this is for introducing some one, however you make a very good point there...Well I guess this is one site I'll learn everyday from.

(in reply to AthenaSurrenders)
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RE: looking for a master - 10/29/2012 2:45:02 PM   
mnottertail


Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
Status: offline
Jesus.  So now I gotta call this a fat beautiful cock?  I dunno about all this politically correct speech.

_____________________________

Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30


(in reply to LoneDevil93)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: looking for a master - 10/29/2012 3:43:51 PM   
fatgirl22


Posts: 2
Joined: 12/28/2011
Status: offline
hi all. So im kinda amazed by the responses! I didnt mean for it to be about my self esteem. I was just describing the way i look and being up front about it. Yeah im fat. So what? I cant go around in denial about it and pretend im skinny trying to fit into clothes from supre! That would be very scary lol.

And the plain bit? I dont want to get the attention of a guy and then be sees a pic and hes expecting this hot chick and then i show up and it was a waste of time. I say i look plain because i beleive i do,
I didnt say ugly because i dont think i am.

Yes there is more to me: i bake awesome cupcakes,
Im kind ect. But its an intro just basic facts. if you get to know me those things will become apparent.

Emma

(in reply to mnottertail)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: looking for a master - 10/29/2012 3:49:58 PM   
AVegasMaster


Posts: 119
Joined: 8/2/2010
Status: offline
Believe me, when you find the ONE you will be the most beautiful creature on earth to him!!!

(in reply to fatgirl22)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: looking for a master - 10/30/2012 10:23:47 PM   
sexyred1


Posts: 8998
Joined: 8/9/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: AthenaSurrenders

Hi Emma and welcome.

I also would prefer to be called 'fat' than 'BBW'. To me Big Beautiful Woman suggests one of two things - either fetishizing fat people (no thanks, I want to be liked for me not just for ticking some sexual box) or that it's implied you have to specify that this particular big woman is beautiful, because most aren't.

That said, both fat and plain are often used as mild insults on someone's appearance, so the OP might well attract people who get off on that type of humiliation or have that type of fetish. Which is OK, if that's what she likes. I just wouldn't want her unintentionally attracting the wrong type of person.


I want to address yours and Emma's posts.

I have never met a woman who called herself a BBW to be fat fetishist.

Whether a man uses that term because HE is a fetishist is his problem. It is quite easy for an intelligent woman to discern whether a man is a BBW fetishist or if he just has a preference. You know, there actually are men who like that.

I was a plus size model for over 13 years and we called ourselves BBW's since the term was coined in the fashion industry.

Unfortunately, you and the poster above you, as well as many other people, tend to generalize that women who call themselves BBW's have self esteem issues or are in denial.

I know I am not in denial; I got paid for my looks as a BBW, so I am realistic in my view of myself. I am beautiful. If you don't think you are, that is your issue, not others.

What all of you forget (and I say all since this topic is overdone to death) is that people have every right to call themselves whatever they like.

Just as I said the OP has every right to call herself fat and plain. However, everyone jumped on her to say, get self esteem, oh you are truly beautiful, etc.

That was not necessary. She knew what she was trying to convey.

Just as the term BBW conveys something.

How nice it would be if people stopped projecting their insecurities on others.


(in reply to AthenaSurrenders)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: looking for a master - 10/31/2012 7:28:03 AM   
BurntKitty


Posts: 3340
Joined: 9/7/2010
From: Here To Eternity.
Status: offline
quote:

What all of you forget (and I say all since this topic is overdone to death) is that people have every right to call themselves whatever they like.


I totally agree with this.

OP- welcome to CM from BK, The Auburn Haired Snarktress of Doom.





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(in reply to sexyred1)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: looking for a master - 10/31/2012 7:40:05 AM   
AthenaSurrenders


Posts: 3582
Joined: 3/15/2012
Status: offline
All your points are excellent but I feel you missed the spirit of my post. I actually meant to support the OP's choice of phrasing if that's what worked for her, and in doing so using the example of why I personally prefer fat over BBW if someone were referring to me.

I felt that the tone of the thread was saying the OP should use some more 'positive' descriptors and I was trying to show that not everyone sees positive in the same way.

I'm sorry if you thought I was belittling people who did chose to use BBW. My response was mostly in response to LoneDevil (no offense Lone) because something about comforting the OP by saying some people might fetishise her made me uncomfortable.

OP - I get what you are saying about being upfront about your appearance. I'm always baffled by people who use photos that are old or of someone else, because I personally would rather someone said 'sorry, I'm not really interested in your type' up front than we met up and I got a negative reaction because they were expecting someone more their type.

Hope that makes sense.

_____________________________

Being your slave, what should I do but tend
Upon the hours and times of your desire?

(in reply to sexyred1)
Profile   Post #: 20
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