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RE: Question for the Sadists out there? - 6/16/2006 6:22:10 AM

MstrssPassion

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I have read many things written by professors, anthropologists, physicians, etc about the topic of sadism & masochism.

To often people view this exchange as cruel & one sided on the part of the sadist & this simply isn't true based on the studies I have read.

Havelock Ellis wrote a great deal on this subject along the same time Sigmund Freud was writing his views. Ellis more on the view of the sexuality. One thing Ellis focused on within his writings was that the sadist's application of pain could not be described as cruelty & that the motivation was that of love. The sadist is concerned with the sexual pleasure of their "victim" & they do not wish to exclude their pleasure & many sadists regard that pleasure as essential to his/her own satisfaction.

< Message edited by MstrssPassion -- 6/16/2006 6:25:32 AM >

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RE: Question for the Sadists out there? - 6/16/2006 6:27:36 AM

KatyLied

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I don't want anyone to miss this (current) thread, in the sub room, about maso:
http://www.collarchat.com/masochism/m_428681/tm.htm

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RE: Question for the Sadists out there? - 6/16/2006 7:02:45 AM

LuckyAlbatross

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quote:

ORIGINAL: heartfeltsub
For those of you who are sadists, may i ask do you prefer to "play with" or look for someone who enjoys the pain for pain sake or someone who doesn't really enjoy the pain for pain sake but submits to it for your sake?

Reposted:
I happen to think actual sadism is incompatible with actual masochism. A sadist wants the other person to feel PAIN, not pleasure. A masochist feels pain AS pleasure.

Fluffy sadists however, who want the other person to enjoy the pain, works perfect with a masochist.

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RE: Question for the Sadists out there? - 6/16/2006 8:06:06 AM

CrappyDom

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I don't often thump my chest here but here goes.

I enjoy both and can deliver both to either. If I want a masochist to HURT, they ain't gonna like it, trust me. Sometimes that IS what gets me off, other times, it is surfing the pain/pleasure barrier with them, seeing how far I can take them.

I also get off on doing the same thing with someone who doesn't like pain. Making someone who doesn't like pain "take" it for me, or when the chemistry is right and I am spot on, making them love the pain, feel it as pleasure, and take them someplace they haven't gone before.

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Post #: 24

RE: Question for the Sadists out there? - 6/16/2006 8:15:54 AM

TxBadMan

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From: Moody, Texas
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quote:

For those of you who are sadists, may i ask do you prefer to "play with" or look for someone who enjoys the pain for pain sake or someone who doesn't really enjoy the pain for pain sake but submits to it for your sake?

I would have to say both, but I would be more interested in one who enjoyed it for pain's sake.

quote:

Also on the same vein, do you prefer to "play with" or look for someone who can go into sub space from the pain or someone who doesn't end up floating from the pain, but stays in the moment.

Again, I would have to say both, but I lean towards those who perfer to stay in the moment.

For myself, it's not so much 'just inflicting' pain. I like to see my girls suffer. There is difference ( in my eyes anyway )

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RE: Question for the Sadists out there? - 6/16/2006 9:27:32 AM

heartfeltsub

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quote:

ORIGINAL: TxBadMan

quote:

For those of you who are sadists, may i ask do you prefer to "play with" or look for someone who enjoys the pain for pain sake or someone who doesn't really enjoy the pain for pain sake but submits to it for your sake?

I would have to say both, but I would be more interested in one who enjoyed it for pain's sake.

quote:

Also on the same vein, do you prefer to "play with" or look for someone who can go into sub space from the pain or someone who doesn't end up floating from the pain, but stays in the moment.

Again, I would have to say both, but I lean towards those who perfer to stay in the moment.

For myself, it's not so much 'just inflicting' pain. I like to see my girls suffer. There is difference ( in my eyes anyway )

i guess i was thinking that someone who likes the pain can float with the pain and not stay in the moment, but i guess it is not mutually exclusive and i was just thinking from my frame of reference as someone who doesn't like the pain and doesn't go into subspace until it is alllllll over. Thank you for giving me something else to ponder.

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RE: Question for the Sadists out there? - 6/16/2006 9:36:40 AM

Darkmike

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Personally it depends.
I like whipping girls who enjoy it mainly.

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RE: Question for the Sadists out there? - 6/16/2006 11:09:36 AM

MistressSassy66

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quote:

ORIGINAL: heartfeltsub

For those of you who are sadists, may i ask do you prefer to "play with" or look for someone who enjoys the pain for pain sake or someone who doesn't really enjoy the pain for pain sake but submits to it for your sake?

Also on the same vein, do you prefer to "play with" or look for someone who can go into sub space from the pain or someone who doesn't end up floating from the pain, but stays in the moment.

i see so many profiles from people who are sadists who say they are looking for masochists and they always make me wonder, because if inflicting pain is what arouses a person sexually, if the person receiving the pain processes it as pleasure, i would think that would lessen the "pleasure" of inflicting the pain. Hence the question.

Thank you in advance for your answers.

heartfelt

*editted because i can't seem to type lately.

For Me personally...I wasnt very Sadistic in the beginning.
But as time goes on and on....I enjoy it with submissives who like it.slave bishops butt has taken a good whipping and she loves it,but I wouldnt say it made her horney or Me horney,its not about sexual feelings for U/us.

There is a certain feeling however with ones that are new and not sure what they can take.Again its not a sexual feeling for Me.Its a high but not like an Orgasm high.

It can be hard to stay grounded for both parties when pain is being inflicted...when thresholds are being crossed.

Okay I have to go whip someone anyone now....LOL

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RE: Question for the Sadists out there? - 6/17/2006 1:37:38 PM

Tamerofwild1s

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I have been called sick . I have been called twisted and just plain ol mean when it comes to my Sadism ... but never have I been called fluffy .. lmao . thats a new one to me ....

wondering where I fit in since I like using a masochist since she will be able to go the extra mile to make sure I get what I need from my twisted Sadism and yet I still like using a slave who may not be able to go the extra and training her to go that extra mile .. but in all that she would do it simply because it brings me pleasure . in return I show her the pleasure in it all so that she will be better capable of handling my demented twisted sadistic thoughts and allow them to spew forth into a realistic session

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RE: Question for the Sadists out there? - 6/17/2006 6:19:57 PM

HouseofBear

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We happen to prefer playing with those who enjoy the pain play.

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RE: Question for the Sadists out there? - 12/5/2007 1:46:41 PM

painslave97

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you might say you like it, but you only talk about it online, you aeren';t the real deal in person

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Post #: 31

RE: Question for the Sadists out there? - 12/5/2007 2:57:09 PM

OldBastardly1

Posts: 651
Joined: 7/22/2006
From: Atlanta, GA
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I like playing with a masochist that enjoys the pain. To see her delight in the pain, even giggle. There is 1 girl that I play with that will repeatedly cum while on the cross, being beaten, even with welts and blood. That is a special time for me. And another, to look into her eyes and see the pure passion as her skin is opened by the dragontail or whip. I truly miss playing with her, LOL.

Simply what I prefer.

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RE: Question for the Sadists out there? - 12/5/2007 3:01:05 PM

Lumus

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Personally, I have a rather strong sadistic streak, but it's more more geared towards hurting a person's mind than their body [though I do enjoy both]. I know, kicking a person upstairs in the cranium is viewed more as humiliation; that's not always the case, though.

I do not see a paradox in inflicting pain upon a person who is subsequently aroused by the act. Sadism can mean enjoyment of the act as well as the result, so it follows that committing the act of inflicting pain can be satisfactory. More to the point, if I make a girl bleed, and she cries, then she has demonstrated that she felt the pain I wanted to inflict...if it also happens to make her wet, so be it.

Then there's the old joke, which I'll paraphrase here: a Dom tells his sub that they will be beaten in an hour. The sub, aroused by pain, can hardly contain themselves. When the hour is upon them, the Dom shrugs and says, "Changed my mind. Rub my feet.". I'd say doing that on purpose and seeing the sub's hopes vanish is a prime example of sadism...and conveniently it's an example of how sadism can be mental, not just physical...

One last comment, for LA. Careful falling into those absolutes, there's no such thing, after all.

'Fluffy' is a cute buzzword, like any other label, and it accomplishes just about as much as any other label, n'est pas?

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RE: Question for the Sadists out there? - 12/5/2007 5:13:29 PM

SirJohnMandevill

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quote:

ORIGINAL: heartfeltsub

For those of you who are sadists, may i ask do you prefer to "play with" or look for someone who enjoys the pain for pain sake or someone who doesn't really enjoy the pain for pain sake but submits to it for your sake?

My former sub was the latter. I found it satisfying, but am really looking for someone who enjoys discipline as part of the D/s dynamic.

But as a good friend of mine said, the BDSM part of a relationship is icing on the D/s cake, not the substance.

Les (Purveyor of Fine, Handcrafted Kink)

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RE: Question for the Sadists out there? - 12/5/2007 11:42:17 PM

MasterFireMaam

Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
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quote:

ORIGINAL: heartfeltsub

For those of you who are sadists, may i ask do you prefer to "play with" or look for someone who enjoys the pain for pain sake or someone who doesn't really enjoy the pain for pain sake but submits to it for your sake?

Also on the same vein, do you prefer to "play with" or look for someone who can go into sub space from the pain or someone who doesn't end up floating from the pain, but stays in the moment.

I will play with either type from question one, although there's a certain rush to someone enduring for me just because it makes me happy. As for the second, I enjoy someone who will reach non-ordinary reality. To me, that can often be spiritual work and I enjoy that in an of itself.

Master Fire

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RE: Question for the Sadists out there? - 12/6/2007 7:54:59 AM

chellekitty

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quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

quote:

ORIGINAL: heartfeltsub
For those of you who are sadists, may i ask do you prefer to "play with" or look for someone who enjoys the pain for pain sake or someone who doesn't really enjoy the pain for pain sake but submits to it for your sake?

Reposted:
I happen to think actual sadism is incompatible with actual masochism. A sadist wants the other person to feel PAIN, not pleasure. A masochist feels pain AS pleasure.

Fluffy sadists however, who want the other person to enjoy the pain, works perfect with a masochist.

so is it actual masochism when i feel nothing but pain, but i don't want it to stop? or am i just fucked in the head?

edited to add: it has nothing to do with enduring it for anyone...i am just enjoying it for pain's sake...

< Message edited by chellekitty -- 12/6/2007 7:56:05 AM >

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RE: Question for the Sadists out there? - 12/6/2007 8:14:55 AM

breatheasone

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quote:

ORIGINAL: chellekitty

quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

quote:

ORIGINAL: heartfeltsub
For those of you who are sadists, may i ask do you prefer to "play with" or look for someone who enjoys the pain for pain sake or someone who doesn't really enjoy the pain for pain sake but submits to it for your sake?

Reposted:
I happen to think actual sadism is incompatible with actual masochism. A sadist wants the other person to feel PAIN, not pleasure. A masochist feels pain AS pleasure.

Fluffy sadists however, who want the other person to enjoy the pain, works perfect with a masochist.

so is it actual masochism when i feel nothing but pain, but i don't want it to stop? or am i just fucked in the head?

edited to add: it has nothing to do with enduring it for anyone...i am just enjoying it for pain's sake...

I ADORE the OP's question(bolded) I think I'll ask Him this... and I am VERY pleased that my Master/Daddy is a "Fluffy Sadist"

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RE: Question for the Sadists out there? - 12/6/2007 10:57:54 AM

heartfeltsub

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Though i originally asked this question a while ago, i am very glad that someone brought the thread back up as it has become applicable to me again. i recently (in the last few of months) went through about 4 operations (girl stuff) and got off of birth control pills and have found that was once a rather high pain tolerance had dramatically changed. Also the frequency of play has also decreased which has had an effect on my pain tolerance. So while stressing about the fact that my pain tolerance is not what it once was and may not ever be that again, One of the Dominants who i serve made sure i realized that He is not so concerned with how much pain i can take but rather is concerned with my obedience. Which was a very reassuring thought for me. While i can not control what my pain tolerance will be in the future, i can control whether i will obey or not. Thank you one and all for your replies.

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RE: Question for the Sadists out there? - 12/6/2007 11:48:25 AM

Mercnbeth

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quote:

do you prefer to "play with" or look for someone who enjoys the pain for pain sake or someone who doesn't really enjoy the pain for pain sake but submits to it for your sake

As a "sadist" my joy and preference is to INFLICT pain. Agreeing to be with me under my terms and conditions guarantees pain will be inflicted - meeting my preference qualification.

If on the other end you "enjoy" the pain - GREAT for you; hope to see you again soon!

If you don't - oh well...; and I still hope to see you again soon!

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Post #: 39

RE: Question for the Sadists out there? - 12/11/2007 12:54:42 AM

Guilty1974

Posts: 467
Joined: 11/2/2005
From: Den Haag
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quote:

ORIGINAL: heartfeltsub

For those of you who are sadists, may i ask do you prefer to "play with" or look for someone who enjoys the pain for pain sake or someone who doesn't really enjoy the pain for pain sake but submits to it for your sake?

Doesn't matter. If soemone likes pain, I'll just start looking for the point where it becomes "less pleasurable".

(in reply to heartfeltsub)

Post #: 40

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