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Lockit -> RE: Lied to (11/15/2012 9:23:10 AM)
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Frankie, I told you what was it... two years ago, that you needed to step up and find a way to take care of yourself and get off the feeling sorry and helpless gig. I even told you how I had done it and how you might do it and everything I said, you had a reason why it wouldn't work. I even understand that fear and the reasons because sometimes those reasons do make sense, but there are ways to cover some of them.
Now, you have continued with the same ol thing and have come no further in finding an answer or happiness because 'this' woman and family drag you down and you don't have enough money to be safely on your own and still have come up with no way to make it on your own. Two years ago or whatever it was, had you done some of the things I told you to do, you wouldn't be here looking again for someone to save you.
You say she lied to you... and maybe she did and she wasn't dominant, but how real is that? You see, I don't think you actually know what submissive is so how can you determine what dominant is? Submissive doesn't mean helpless and dependent. So... lets get down to the human factor. You are an adult human. Scared and stuck. You don't have inside you the determination to save yourself and that is a very scary sign to others that are healthy emotionally. You will only find in a rescue, someone as dysfunctional as the situation and people involved in your situation now, that will come to rescue hoping you will rescue them in some way.
It will take extreme measures to save yourself and it will be scary, but any other way than the hard road will only be harder in the end. There is no easy way out. You take the road that looks the scariest now and you will make it and find self respect and confidence and then you may be worth some interest of a healthy woman, if she can get passed the fact that you waited so long in life to step up and be what you needed to be not only for yourself, but anyone involved with you.
Had you listened to me two years ago, you could now be in public housing after renting a studio apartment or room-mating, but you didn't listen then and I doubt you will listen now. Your victimization by a woman that lied to you has only been compounded by the lies you feed on that come from you. I've been in tough spots... hell... I have lived in tough spots for many years. I wonder right at this moment how I am going to save the food we have in the house because the fridge is going out. Am I comfortable in what I have to do to solve this problem? No. It means a monthly bill I can little afford. I am not just working on this issue, but others and you know what, I am doing everything I can to find more income and working my ass off to do it. I am as disabled as you could be from what I know... but I have to dig deep. The difference between you and I isn't that I am dominant and you are submissive. It is that I am determined to do it without being needy, dysfunctional and looking for a savior.
Time to adult up or stay right where you are another two years.
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