Addressing new dominants.

Addressing new dominants. (Full Version)

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emmacarrie86 -> Addressing new dominants. (11/22/2012 2:02:56 PM)
Hi I have also posted this in ask a dom but want to know ther submissives points of view too. I was just wondering what is everyones take on the ettiquete when a submissive talks to a new Dom?? I already have a Master who I love to bits but I am on this site for friends, however a dom i am talking to has been telling me i HAVE to address him as Sir and he has been telling me that my Dom is doing things wrong for instance anal training etc and has been telling me the "correct way" and bossing me about. He also calls me subby.He is always very pushy with me and demands my 100% attention as well. Isnt BDSM interpretive? I feel that until I know someone well enough and they have gained my trust i shouldnt HAVE to call him anything. What is everyone elses opinion??

DarkSteven -> RE: Addressing new dominants. (11/22/2012 2:24:39 PM)
You've already posted this in Ask a Master. I suspect the mods will delete this thread (they don't like cross posted threads). All sorts of folks will answer your question there, not just male Doms.

GingerFreak -> RE: Addressing new dominants. (11/22/2012 4:55:16 PM)
I lwould tell him where to get off! Just because he is a Dom and you are talking to him does not give him the right to treat you like his property! He is probably trying to assert his authority when he clearly doesn't need to as you have already said you are just looking for friends! He is on an ego trip and I would avoid!

emmacarrie86 -> RE: Addressing new dominants. (11/22/2012 4:57:45 PM)
Thanks :) he has been blocked and deleted on skype at the request of my master

GingerFreak -> RE: Addressing new dominants. (11/22/2012 5:01:01 PM)
No probs! Just weed out the knobs and best of luck for the future!

VerypickyDom -> RE: Addressing new dominants. (11/22/2012 5:07:42 PM)
There is one step that no one here has said... as a matter of communications I would also recommend that before you had done anything permanent that you reminded him that you were already taken and that he had no authority over you what so ever....

DomMeinCT -> RE: Addressing new dominants. (11/22/2012 9:14:05 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: emmacarrie86 Thanks :) he has been blocked and deleted on skype at the request of my master You were having discussions about anal "training" with a complete stranger who was demanding things of you? Bigger issue before you worry about how to address him is how did you allow the conversation to get to that point in the first place.

smartsub10 -> RE: Addressing new dominants. (11/22/2012 9:28:50 PM)
There are so many twatfaces out there who can't make time with a vanilla woman so they come on this site with demands of "Call me Sir!!", "On your knees, bitch" and the like. Block. Delete.

Toppingfrmbottom -> RE: Addressing new dominants. (11/22/2012 10:07:45 PM)
Id laugh "in his face say yeah nice try but no " then stop talking to him.

MstSebastian -> RE: Addressing new dominants. (11/22/2012 11:36:56 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: smartsub10 There are so many twatfaces out there who can't make time with a vanilla woman so they come on this site with demands of "Call me Sir!!", "On your knees, bitch" and the like. Block. Delete. I had the reverse of that happen once. I had a sub boy contact me on the other side, and in the FIRST email he was calling me "Master." I told him that he doesn't have to call me "Sir" or "Master." He just screamed back (in all caps, of course) that I was "A FAKE WANNABE" because "REAL DOMS DEMAND RESPECT IMMEDIATELY." Yeah, that was a laugh for me. [:D]

seekingreality -> RE: Addressing new dominants. (11/22/2012 11:46:17 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: emmacarrie86 Hi I have also posted this in ask a dom but want to know ther submissives points of view too. I was just wondering what is everyones take on the ettiquete when a submissive talks to a new Dom?? I already have a Master who I love to bits but I am on this site for friends, however a dom i am talking to has been telling me i HAVE to address him as Sir and he has been telling me that my Dom is doing things wrong for instance anal training etc and has been telling me the "correct way" and bossing me about. He also calls me subby.He is always very pushy with me and demands my 100% attention as well. Isnt BDSM interpretive? I feel that until I know someone well enough and they have gained my trust i shouldnt HAVE to call him anything. What is everyone elses opinion?? Here's my opinion: As a sub, I am not submissive to the world, but only to those I choose to be submissive to. Just because someone self-identifies as dominant doesn't mean I have to like them, respect them, listen to them, or address them in any way other than how I want to. They have no rights with me other than those I give them. If I were you, and I was talking to this guy, I'd say: "You're being an asshole. Quit calling me 'subby." My name is X. You can address me by my name and I'll address you by your name. And if that's too much for you, then you can move on. i won't mind one bit. So it's choice: Be an asshole and watch me yawn and hang up, or be real and see what happens."

autumnember -> RE: Addressing new dominants. (11/23/2012 5:20:12 AM)
[sm=agree.gif]

kiwisub12 -> RE: Addressing new dominants. (11/23/2012 6:30:02 AM)
It must be the left over turkey in my system but all i could think of when i read this title was a little turkey carcass dressed in a tuxedo.........

Toysinbabeland -> RE: Addressing new dominants. (11/23/2012 6:41:30 AM)
What does your Master say regarding intimate conversation with another?

chatterbox24 -> RE: Addressing new dominants. (11/23/2012 8:44:46 AM)
hee hee hee. Reminds me of the guy who insisted he would own me. Send pics, cam, tell me how he wanted addressed. I hadnt even met the guy, I am not into the internet I own you bit, he was a dom ya know, so if he was interested, of course he was gonna own me and of course I was gonna mind and send nasty pics and of course I was gonna cam at his insistance. NOT NOT NOT............what a wanker. Needless to say we are no longer talking. You can be plain as day sometimes and people dont get it. I hate to say this, but it has proven true. ALot of guys who say they want to be friends also, 90% end up down nastyville. They have an agenda. No offense to those minority sincere guys out there. Just an observation.

poise -> RE: Addressing new dominants. (11/23/2012 8:51:56 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: DomMeinCT You were having discussions about anal "training" with a complete stranger who was demanding things of you? Bigger issue before you worry about how to address him is how did you allow the conversation to get to that point in the first place. This x 15584622911656684! If you were sitting on a bus, and the passenger next to you wanted you to call him HisRoyalHeinyHumper, and to discuss how to properly screw you in your butt, would you stay seated and carry on the discussion? [:-] Online should be even easier to figure out. Do Not Respond!

autumnember -> RE: Addressing new dominants. (11/23/2012 1:15:02 PM)
lol i like you

wandersalone -> RE: Addressing new dominants. (11/25/2012 9:29:14 AM)
I had someone say I could call him x (his real name) or sir. I call him by his real name. If I had not been given a choice we would not be meeting for a coffee next week

MAINEiacMISTRESS -> RE: Addressing new dominants. (11/25/2012 10:36:04 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: wandersalone I had someone say I could call him x (his real name) or sir. I call him by his real name. If I had not been given a choice we would not be meeting for a coffee next week It should always be a choice...and then if anything develops submission should happen over time, not jumped right into. I hate the idea of "forcing" someone to do something...because that means it's not coming from their HEART. I want them to ENJOY doing it. It should be a mutual thing that grows in both of us. I'm not interested in a fast-track "SUBMIT TO ME NOWWWWW!" situation (even though I enjoy engaging in Protocol together with My subbies whom I know). Developed over time D/s can mean a MUCH stronger friendship/relationship. And a side-note to you subbies: many of you are equally guilty of putting a rush on things. You are so eager to find a Dominant that you jump right into it (eager puppies practically peeing yourselves with glee at having caught the attention of a Dominant). I've been contacted by some subbies who want to call Me "Mistress" right off the bat, want to kneel at My feet, etc., and go through the whole protocol thing immediately. Awww, that's charming but I really like to develop a FRIENDSHIP first, then see how things advance. Don't rush things, many Dominants don't like that approach either and will think you aren't sincere. Personally I think the rush types "burn out" quicker because they skip the "exploration" phase of getting to know each other. --MM

MAINEiacMISTRESS -> RE: Addressing new dominants. (11/25/2012 10:41:45 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: emmacarrie86 Hi I have also posted this in ask a dom but want to know ther submissives points of view too. I was just wondering what is everyones take on the ettiquete when a submissive talks to a new Dom?? I already have a Master who I love to bits but I am on this site for friends, however a dom i am talking to has been telling me i HAVE to address him as Sir and he has been telling me that my Dom is doing things wrong for instance anal training etc and has been telling me the "correct way" and bossing me about. He also calls me subby.He is always very pushy with me and demands my 100% attention as well. Isnt BDSM interpretive? I feel that until I know someone well enough and they have gained my trust i shouldnt HAVE to call him anything. What is everyone elses opinion?? My Collared subbies have a line they use on other Dominants who try to dominate them: "FUCK...OFF!" You have GIVEN your submission to your Dom. Any other Dominant should have the brains to RESPECT that.

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