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theSwan -> RE: Am I just completely insane or what? (11/24/2012 11:42:15 PM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Theservileone
But still I worry she might find out I have feelings for her I'm not a very emotional person something we both have in common so maybe we're just two lonely people trying to connect to someone. What do you think I should do? I mean if I tell her and she rejects me she might cast me aside and that's the last thing I want before I met her I never even would consider serving someone now being her servant is all I want. What if she thinks I deceived her? Have I deceived her? Do I even deserve to be her slave? I really need some advice on this.
quote:
ORIGINAL: theRose4U
Ok here's the deal, if you paid for sessions now tell her "I only came in because I wanted to date you" yes she's going to feel betrayed. Like it or not you started with a lie! That being said, how many sessions, how long this has been going on will be an issue.
You do realize that "dating you" isn't going to mean her stopping her work right?
Aakashia would probably have better first hand answers if you POLITELY c-mail her saying it was recommended in the forums.
Still don't think this sounds like a situation that will turn out the way you hope.
I am certainly not an expert on Dominatrix/submissive relationships but..
I can see an extremely romantic and honorable way to say that you came in because you wanted to date her.
You've already gotten an excellent start.
Something along the lines of..
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I saw you every day for [# of days] days, coming and going from where you worked.
I finally got up the courage to learn more about you the day that I walked into your dungeon.
[Maybe that sounds awkward but just roll with me on this so far.]
I thought I was going to ask you on a date, I wanted to get to know you.
I was shocked when I found out where I was and what was going on.
I froze when you asked if I was there for a session and all I could say is yes.
And I kept coming back, thinking I would ask you to go on that date with me.
And I kept finding myself unable to do anything.
But consent to session after session with you.
I wasn't looking to be dominated. I didn't know anything about that culture or that world.
But when I was without you, I felt how badly I missed being your servant.
And now, years later, I know that I want you, I need you in my life.
I wasn't looking for someone to dominate me.
I was looking for you.
And even when being with you came in nothing of the package I imagined it would, I chased it and I don't regret it.
I care about you/love you [whatever describes what you feel].
And as crazy as this journey was for me, I am happy because it means that I've been able to be yours.
I should have been honest with you from the beginning and I definitely should have told you the truth before now.
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Now, I am definitely a romantic and I can imagine how this wouldn't be as beautiful for everyone as I imagine it to be.
Maybe there should be more aloof respect and protocol, maybe the dishonesty at all is a deal breaker.
But, original poster, I want you to know that I think the situation you've worked yourself into speaks beautiful things of you.
And honors the woman who you are speaking of.
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