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Hello - 11/29/2012 7:18:19 AM

buzzy10019

Posts: 2
Joined: 11/27/2012
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This is probably old stuff for most of you, but I would just like to type it out.
In the BDSM experience, there needs to be a tremendous amount of trust right from the start. The relinquishing of negotiation and control is very hard, but very healthy. I believe the problem with a great number of ladies, is that they are unable to imagine the rewards of letting go and giving; they cannot comprehend the paradox that they will receive far more than they give.
If you grasp this, I would like to hear from you.

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RE: Hello - 11/29/2012 9:08:01 AM

poise

Posts: 9509
Joined: 7/3/2010
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Hi there buzzy. While it's a bit unrealistic to expect a tremendous amount of trust right from the start, the rest isn't really
all that hard to figure out. Just be the kind of man that the great many ladies with problems can let it all go to.

_____________________________

When the path ignites a soul, there’s no remaining in place.

(in reply to buzzy10019)

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RE: Hello - 11/29/2012 9:56:39 AM

saundrakitty

Posts: 148
Joined: 9/11/2012
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I agree with poise, on this part. Its is hard to trust someone right at the first meeting, but if you take the time and show who you are and be totally honest and true to yourself, then even those that have been hurt will develop the trust that is needed and can then completely let down the barriers and be comfortable to let go and release complete control. Trust us many of us know how great the rewards are when We let go and give completely with out reserve, and We also know we receive what we need from a Dominate as well as He gets what he needs from us. This is the same even in the vanilla relationship.

(in reply to poise)

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RE: Hello - 11/29/2012 11:37:11 AM

AthenaSurrenders

Posts: 3582
Joined: 3/15/2012
Status: offline

Hi buzzy, welcome to the boards.

Your post does raise some interesting points. I might argue that I feel relinquishing negotiation and control and having complete trust 'right from the start' is actually quite unhealthy, in that it goes against common sense self-preservation. I'm a big believer in take it slow, get to know a person well before handing over control and build that trust until it's rock solid.

And I say that as someone who knows very well the pleasure of letting go of control and giving.

Come and join in some threads, there are lots of other interesting discussions to weigh in on.

_____________________________

Being your slave, what should I do but tend
Upon the hours and times of your desire?

(in reply to buzzy10019)

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RE: Hello - 11/29/2012 12:52:17 PM

DomMeinCT

Posts: 2355
Joined: 5/5/2005
Status: offline

Right from the start? Not a chance. You're a stranger to me until you prove you're worthy of my trust (and I the same).

But welcome, even if I don't agree.

_____________________________

The meeting of two personalities is like the contact of two chemical substances:
if there is any reaction, both are transformed.
~ Carl Jung

(in reply to buzzy10019)

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Post #: 5