RE: What is the one piece of advice you would give an aspiring Dom/sub?

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RE: What is the one piece of advice you would give an a... - 11/29/2012 6:33:11 PM

icarus020

Posts: 21
Joined: 11/16/2012
Status: offline

I'd have to say hide from those you love only as long as you need to.

Now I realise that seems silly given that none of my pictures show a clear view of my face. Well first off it's nothing much to look at and secondly, my professional reputation need protecting. I, from time to time give evidence in courts and I cannot afford to give ammunition to the enemy (what the hell does that say about our system?).

But seriously, tell the people you care about. By that I don't necessarily mean your birth family. My family are people who are not blood relative but who are far more solid and supporting than blood-kin. My family are people I've chosen to have in my life and chosen to be in their lives. We've been through some dark times together and have stuck with each other (god how grey's anatomy did that sound :S). All of those people I count as my family know about my submissive tendancies. They don't all know to what extent, but they know. It's a useful thing too.

Hide only if you have to! (Sorry for the long post!)

(in reply to TNDommeK)

Post #: 21

RE: What is the one piece of advice you would give an a... - 11/29/2012 7:10:31 PM

kalikshama

Posts: 14805
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The booklist: http://www.collarchat.com/m_1726118/tm.htm

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(in reply to icarus020)

Post #: 22

RE: What is the one piece of advice you would give an a... - 11/30/2012 6:15:42 AM

ResidentSadist

Posts: 12580
Joined: 2/11/2007
From: a mean old Daddy, but I like you - Joni Mitchell
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: TheWriter13

The advice I would give would be don't be a doormat, have a safe word and remember S.C.C. Safe Sane Consensual.

That's three pieces of advice not one.

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I give good thread.

(in reply to TheWriter13)

Post #: 23

RE: What is the one piece of advice you would give an a... - 11/30/2012 6:30:21 AM

theRose4U

Posts: 3403
Joined: 8/22/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: icarus020
. I, from time to time give evidence in courts and I cannot afford to give ammunition to the enemy (what the hell does that say about our system?).

If this is true you need to switch to an avitar TODAY!!! Because this post tells us facial recognition software isn't your area of expertise.

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(in reply to icarus020)

Post #: 24

RE: What is the one piece of advice you would give an a... - 11/30/2012 9:56:44 AM

littlewonder

Posts: 15659
Status: offline

I like being a doormat thankyouverymuch, never had a safeword and I'm not anywhere close to ssc.

As for my advice: Be yourself and bdsm is absolutely no different than any other relationship on the planet so don't park your brain outside.

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Nothing has changed
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(in reply to TheWriter13)

Post #: 25

RE: What is the one piece of advice you would give an a... - 11/30/2012 1:51:30 PM

MissImmortalPain

Posts: 2440
Joined: 4/1/2011
Status: offline

Always remember that no matter which side of the "kneel" you are on that you do not, and will never, know everything.

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It is always by way of pain that we arrive at pleasure.

We must all go through a right of passage,and it must be physical, it must be painful,and it must leave a mark.

(in reply to TheWriter13)

Post #: 26

RE: What is the one piece of advice you would give an a... - 11/30/2012 3:54:45 PM

lthrpup

Posts: 125
Joined: 4/28/2004
Status: offline

Go where the people are: a kink/fetish event, a munch, a serious fetish store, a lowkey meeting at the coffee shop with your newfound kinky cyber friend.

(in reply to TNDommeK)

Post #: 27

RE: What is the one piece of advice you would give an a... - 11/30/2012 4:07:06 PM

PranksterBtch

Posts: 30
Joined: 10/15/2012
Status: offline

Be yourself. Watch out for Dom/mes who act like they have a chip on the shoulder, or subs who will do "anything and everything."

Edited to add: I'm talking about the subs/slaves who will "do anything and everything for you," before they've ever met you. For me, this basically says, "I don't care who you are, just beat me, whip me, make me cum." Sounds like a professional Dom/me is more in order for them. Now ... if they know you, ignore this lol. Some truly love and need to be used to feel fulfilled. That's all good.

< Message edited by PranksterBtch -- 11/30/2012 4:12:48 PM >

(in reply to TNDommeK)

Post #: 28

RE: What is the one piece of advice you would give an a... - 11/30/2012 5:22:06 PM

PhoenixDynasty

Posts: 6
Joined: 9/3/2012
Status: offline

Never stop learning and growing.

(in reply to PranksterBtch)

Post #: 29

RE: What is the one piece of advice you would give an a... - 11/30/2012 6:54:36 PM

LookieNoNookie

Posts: 12216
Joined: 8/9/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: TheWriter13

The advice I would give would be don't be a doormat, have a safe word and remember S.C.C. Safe Sane Consensual.

quote:

would

Don't.

(Ever).

(in reply to TheWriter13)

Post #: 30

RE: What is the one piece of advice you would give an a... - 11/30/2012 9:44:21 PM

Nakhla

Posts: 104
Joined: 10/24/2012
Status: offline

Have a plan B, because if person A doesn't work out, you will still be alive and needing to do something with your life.

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(in reply to TheWriter13)

Post #: 31

RE: What is the one piece of advice you would give an a... - 12/1/2012 6:20:13 AM

TheWriter13

Posts: 77
Joined: 6/29/2012
Status: offline

Don't think D/s relationships are easier than vanilla they are not.

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Men have called me mad; but the question is not settled, whether madness is or is not the loftiest of intelligence...-Edgar Allan Poe

(in reply to TNDommeK)

Post #: 32

RE: What is the one piece of advice you would give an a... - 12/1/2012 6:36:30 AM

JstAnotherSub

Posts: 6174
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LaTigresse

Personal responsibility.....live it.

It's still........just a relationship.

this

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yep

(in reply to LaTigresse)

Post #: 33

RE: What is the one piece of advice you would give an a... - 12/1/2012 9:55:44 AM

autumnember

Posts: 185
Joined: 8/30/2012
Status: offline

To dominant types: Don't ride the white horse
To submissive types: Stop looking for someone to rescue you

(in reply to JstAnotherSub)

Post #: 34

RE: What is the one piece of advice you would give an a... - 12/2/2012 11:10:50 PM

MinkNoir

Posts: 3
Joined: 12/1/2012
Status: offline

Everyone's situation is different,but experience has taught me to value myself and all that I have to offer.
Don't lose yourself and do what is right for you. Not everything is right for everyone.

(in reply to TNDommeK)

Post #: 35

RE: What is the one piece of advice you would give an a... - 12/2/2012 11:58:44 PM

kitkat105

Posts: 1690
Joined: 11/29/2011
From: Eating dutch crunch in the Silicon Valley
Status: offline

Have fun. Because having fun in life is good for you.

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(in reply to TNDommeK)

Post #: 36

RE: What is the one piece of advice you would give an a... - 12/3/2012 2:02:54 AM

LordofDecadence

Posts: 12
Joined: 3/10/2012
Status: offline

For Subs and Slaves: You Always have the Right to say "No" and not consent.

For Doms: Take care of your subs the same way you would take care of something you value.

(in reply to kitkat105)

Post #: 37

RE: What is the one piece of advice you would give an a... - 12/3/2012 7:57:34 AM

SimplyMichael

Posts: 7229
Joined: 1/7/2007
Status: offline

Two pages of wildy different "most important thing is" advice...

Most of it utterly lacking in guidance on how to achieve it if you actually dont already get it.

Advice is most needed by those least likely to understand it and most in need of it.

And some give advice as a lure to snag just such people...

(in reply to LordofDecadence)

Post #: 38

RE: What is the one piece of advice you would give an a... - 12/3/2012 6:06:26 PM

littlewonder

Posts: 15659
Status: offline

I really don't get the whole giving advice to newbies. I mean, you are either dominant or you are not. If you are dominant then you should already have an idea of what you want and all that. Why does bdsm somehow make that different?

If you can't be you then maybe it's time to rethink your life. That's my only real advice I guess.

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Nothing has changed
Everything has changed

(in reply to SimplyMichael)

Post #: 39

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